Terrified! (Don't open if sensitive)

[pearl20]

Hiya! Please don't read this if you're about to give birth as I really don't want to scare anyone!

I guess I'm looking for some reassurance really...

I'm 20 years old, 36+3 weeks pregnant with my first baby. I worry about my health ... a lot.

I am so scared that I am going to die during/after childbirth. Sorry if this sounds ridiculous but it's just a fear I've had ever since I fount out I was pregnant. Thankfully, I've been able to block these instructive thoughts for the majority of my pregnancy and enjoy everything. But as my due date becomes closer and closer, it's something I can't stop thinking about. I've spoke to my MW about it and she has told me it's rare etc but I don't think she quite understands how much it is in fact scaring me!

My biggest fear is post-partum haemorrhage. I don't know why. I am classed as a low risk pregnancy and I am healthy but this just doesn't ease my mind and when doing research on line, looking for articles trying to soothe me, it makes me worse! I don't find them very reassuring at all. My BMI was perfect before I fell pregnant and I've put on 3 stone which is making me so paranoid that my weight is going to affect me in some way!

Does anyone have any advice? Any reassurance? What are the statistics? Will I die or will I be ok?

Thank you in advance.

Statistics? They are not going to help you because unless you go into why then you dont know if they have preexisting medical issues

My personal statistics are I've had three I've a preexisting medical issue we are all here and ok

Googling will feed into this my advice is talk again to your midwife express your concerns that despite knowing that its a common fear you dont believe this level of fear is normal or reasonable

If you get no joy go to a doctor

I've had 4 and it did not cross my mind xx

And yes it is a common fear my ex husband asked the midwife if something went wrong who would they save me or the baby? That horrified the midwife she did tr6 and hide it

Hello there, I can empathise with your fears.I had same fears when I had my first child 5 years ago.I was convinced I would bleed to death after childbirth as I was told I was high risk for Hemorrhage due to multiple fibroid.I pleaded and pleaded with consultant to let me have c section on account of my fears but they refused.The Dee day came and I gave birth and everything went fine.No hemmorhage despite my fibroids.
Today am 38 weeks pregnant with my second still have multiple fibroids and classed as high risk but this time am confident that all will be well.The only fear i have now is how to face the labor pains.

You have mentioned you are not high risk.Its very very unlikely for you to die during childbirth in this country.Theres lots of emergency provision available even if something were to go wrong.Even if hemmorhage(I apologise for spelling) occurs there are ways they can put a stop to it.You will be fine .I wish you safe delivery

Thank you for all your responses!

@Bree88 made me feel so much better already so thank you! I suppose I just have to trust the medical professionals and reminds myself how many women do this day in day out and that it is very rare something bad will happen! Good luck to you too! X

It's very rare somebody dies during or due to complications of labour. I did haemorrhage when delivering the placenta in a hospital that's been named and shamed for its maternity care and I cannot fault them. I didn't feel it and couldn't see anything as the doctors and midwives were so unbelievably quick and efficient. They have packs ready for anything like that so if it does happen they are fully trained to deal with it. You are in the hands of people who deliver babies daily so have faith that they know what they are doing. My experience hasn't put me off having more babies but if you do give birth and don't understand why something happened or want to discuss it request a debrief as they can talk you through everything. Hopefully you will have a completely smooth labour but if it doesn't go quite to plan you will have amazing medical professionals to help you through it

@ToTravelIsToLive that's exactly my worry! I spoke to my midwife today about it as I had an appointment with her and she assured me I'm in good hands and also encouraged me to have the injection after giving birth to encourage the uterus to contract and deliver the placenta, she said it should hopefully put my mind at ease more.
But reading your experience, to say that's in a hospital that people spoke badly about and they still managed to deal with your situation amazingly says everything! Thank you ☺️ I do feel better hearing other people's experiences. I'm sure I'll be ok as I know it's rare but it's just that "what if" thought

It is always a possibility so I would have been wrong to say it won't happen etc and dismiss your fears. I am glad my experience has offered some reassurance. The worst bit for me was remembering to take iron tablets after with baby brain but I filled my calender on my phone with reminders

I had a haemorrhage and lost 2.3l after a difficult birth last year and just to reassure you that it wasn’t nearly as traumatic as it sounds. In fact, it wasn’t traumatic at all, and I’m a complete wimp. Staff were very clearly prepared, knew what they were doing and there was no panic. So l didn’t panic either. I had the baby on my chest as they were sorting me out and I was much more focused on her. The team looked so in control, no one skipped a beat. I honestly can’t praise them enough. I was tired afterwards - as you’d expect even without the bleeding- but then had a transfusion two days later and that was like someone had flicked a switch on. I had lots more energy and felt much better.
Just to reassure you that even a situation like that doesn’t have to be scary.