What would you do based on these factors?

[PSL1990]

I am trying to decide between a VBAC or ELCS for my baby due in Feb.

My first baby was born at 40+10 via EMCS at full dilation after a 38 hour back to back labour and failed ventouse, he weighed 9lbs 5oz. My next baby is due 21 months after my EMCS. My consultant says either option should be 'safe' based on my circumstances and that she didn't have a strong preference for me and was completely happy for me to choose. I'm undecided and she suggested writing down key pros and cons which I've managed to boil right down to this:

VBAC pro = better for me emotionally, mental health etc as I was disappointed by needing an EMCS last time

VBAC con = potentially harder/longer recovery. My recovery from my EMCS was amazingly easy and barely any of my friends have recovered from a natural birth as quickly. Obviously there could be complications with either option but I do feel a bit safer at the thought of an ELCS

ELCS pro - could book this for 39 weeks. I've been struggling with SPD, sciatica, abdomen pain and just generally looking after my 19 month old (I'm a SAHM)

ELCS con - I hate the thought of all the adhesions and scar tissue caused by multiple c sections and so I'm sure 2 c sections would be my limit. If I have another c section this time, I'm sure it would mean our last baby and would rule out a third (although I think we'd most likely stick to two anyway)

There are so many other pros and cons I'm considering but these are the ones that I think are most important to me. Of course, above everything is safety and if for any reason it was far safer to go with one option I would do that but as things stand, my consultant thinks either option would be fine.

My questions are - what would you do in these circumstances and why? Which pro/con is the most important? And just generally, what are your thoughts and advice on this?

Thank you!

My first was a c section at 40+13 after 36 hours of back to back labour my recovery was horrible ended up spending ten weeks in hospital all my scar got infected and swore I'd never had another my second they pushed for me to have a c section as I was very high risk of scar rupture I refused and DD was born after 1 hour 40 mins home after 6 hours and walked to town next day with my third again they wanted c section I refused ds was 11 hours forceps plus cut from front to back currently 23 weeks pregnant and not got a choice this time I have to have a c section and I'm petrified all labours are different and even tho your first labour was difficult it dosent mean the second one will be u can have a plan in place I was only allowed to labour for 6 hours with my second then would have to have a section speak to your consultant see what plans you can have in place if it was me I would go for a vbac but only because of the horrible experience I had with my section I'm convinced it's going to happen again x

I can't comment on a csection be it emergency or elective as I have never had one (they kind of scare me🙈) but I've had two natural births and recovered pretty well and fairly quickly. First baby was 7lb 11 and 2nd was 9lb 8 so big difference in size but recovered pretty much the same after both.

Personally if I was in your situation giving that your last birth ended up in emergency I would preferably go for a elective and I can totally sympathise with you with having spd etc it's horrible esp when having other children to look after so I think for those factors I'd choose the csection but of course its your body and I've never actually had one so I'm not too sure on recovery etc after one x