I am faced with the choice of where to have my second child which is due July 09. I had my first at ESH in 2004. I shake at the mere mention of the place.
I was at the time quite overweight and I was treated as a leper throughout every visit. I was a nuisance and disgusting to be drawing on their resources. I had never in my life experienced prejudism or bullying until I became pregnant.
I had to be induced, which they did and then pretty much abandoned me in a room all night. My waters broke and I started contractions through the night. The staff absolutely refused to let me call my husband to let him know I was in labour and I was told he would not be allowed in until 10am the next morning. I laboured the whole night completely on my own (many times on the floor).
Having been induced, my contractions started to occur the next morning with very few breaks in between. I was advised to have an epidural which I accepted. The midwife and the anaesthatist were bickering and arguing for 20 minutes whilst getting ready for this. I was sat up and the epidural was administered. The anaesthatist suddenly swore and said he'd gone in too far. I was warned that I may begin to feel very ill.
I eventually gave birth at 10pm and then was put into a private room where I was left. I began to have excruciating headaches and I couldn't move my neck. My baby kept gagging on mucas. I was never encouraged to feed her or anything so did this on instinct although I didn't know what I was doing. I could barely sit up and kept thinking I was going to faint. I buzzed for help which came eventually and was given two paracetamols and then left till the morning. I was screaming for my husband by now as I was in agony. I was told again that I would not be allowed to call him and he would not be allowed back until visiting time.
The next day, I was told that I would have to go back to theatre to have a blood patch done on my spine. The nurse irritably asked what I wanted her to feed my baby with and got very impatient when I couldn't talk for crying.
I came back from theatre with a drip in each arm and left yet again to cope with my baby alone ( try using the wheeling a crib and two drips to the toilet). Not once was I offered food or even a wash. When I asked, the nurse said that I should have filled out a menu (How? in theatre). She said I'd have to go to the day room to see if there was anything left. I practically crawled there as my husband was told that he wasn't allowed to get anything for me and he was refused entry to the day room anyway. Blood patch hadn't worked (they tried 4 times in the end on seperate occassions). I was moved to a ward. My husband drew the curtains round so that he could help me to attempt to feed whilst laying down, there were other fathers and I desired some privacy as I was struggling. The nurse ripped the curtains back and said that I wasn't allowed to have them closed as it was a security risk
Throughout all of this, my own Mother was understandably beside herself and was reluctant to leave my side. Again, she was allowed very limited access to me.
I had 2 years of severe post natal depression and couldn't bond with baby for 7 months. This all definitley contributed to it. I only wish that I had had the strength to fight for justice but I was so broken and humiliated. Can't believe that I have found the strength to have another child but I could never go back to ESGH. The good news is that I am starting 6 stones lighter this time.