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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

How do I have this baby?Elective section or risk normal delivery?

16 replies

Flo23 · 21/08/2007 19:57

My ds(now 2.5)was 2 wks overdue and weighed in at 11lb 3...I had a normal delivery and a 3rd degree tear.Tear healed pretty well but it took me quite a while to come to terms with a fairly traumatic delivery and I remember feeling a bit ruined by the whole experience.
Anyway am now 35wks preg and have been offered an elective section,but am so unsure what to do.Am worried about the recovery post section,having a 2 yr old and a new baby to look after(dh will take 2 wks off work)Could go for a normal delivery and everything be absolutely fine,or could end up with another nasty tear and other horrible probs.Could have a section and risk all that involves.
Just wanted to know if anyone else has had similar experience and what did you do!?
Growth scan next wk,but I feel like this is also a rather hefty baby...

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mousemole · 21/08/2007 20:08

DS1 was a week late and 9lbs. Went into labour and got to 5cms and then all went wrong (his hearbeat was failing etc etc) so ended up having an emergency c section. DS1 is now 2 and have just had DS2 'naturally'. He was 5 days early, weighed 9lbs and I had an episiotomy and 3rd degree tear.
The 'natural' approach was tough but the recovery SO MUCH better than a c section. I was up and about straight away ( albeit it with a very sore bottom half) tending to my toddler. beleive me, with a c section you will be in bed for a while, cant drive for 6 etc. Having done both I am going for natural next time. Yes, it was sore to sit down for a while but on the whole so much better than having my tummy cut open !

TuttiFrutti · 21/08/2007 21:49

Really difficult decision because it's crystal ball territory.

In your situation I think I would be tempted to try for a natural birth. Just because you tore badly last time doesn't necessarily mean you will again. On the other hand, there is the "big baby" thing and you may be one of those women like me who always has big babies, which means greater risk of tearing and difficult births. You will be in a better position to judge after your growth scan.

I don't think recovery after an elective c-section is as bad as Mousemole has painted it, but then I see she had an emergency which is much worse. I've had both elective and emergency, and with the elective was out of bed a few hours later and driving 3 weeks later.

Original poster

Flo23 · 21/08/2007 22:02

Thank you for replies. Think will have to wait for scan next week,but really my instinct is to go for normal delivery..

OP posts:

loler · 21/08/2007 22:09

I had similar experience with 1st birth. Was very scared of 2nd birth and was also offered an elective CS. Decided that would have a go at natural delivery as was more scared of having to deal with a toddler and scar!

So was induced slightly early, was all very calm and relaxed and allowed time to plan pain relief (epidural!!!). Although DS was bigger it was a completely different experience - i.e. was fantastic!

Am due to be induced for no. 3 on Tuesday, growth scan shows this is another big one - and although the first time is worrying me hoping that will be a repeat of number 2!

It is true that every birth is different. Good luck and don't be scared of induction!

Loopymumsy · 22/08/2007 16:51

This reply has been deleted

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loopyredangel · 22/08/2007 19:45

Can I just ask, why are you having a growth scan? Is this something that is offered as standard?

mamawhyte · 22/08/2007 19:53

I had this exact same dilemma and spent months agonising over it. I got completely stressed out trying to convince myself that a natural birth was the best option. I studied both options obsessively, spoke to doulas, midwives, friends, doctors, anyone who'd listen. Then one day I realised that I was waiting for someone to tell methat it would be 100% safe to have a natural birth but obviously no-one could. I realised that there was no way I would be relaxed enough at the birth to be able to experience a "good" birth experience and opted for a c-section. All the weight was lifted off my shoulders, I hired a doula to help at the birth, organised parents to come and help for the 6 weeks and took homeopathy to speed up the recovery.

I can honestly say that for me I made the best decision. It was a wonderful experience. I had a doula with me who helped me write a birth plan so that I could hold and feed my baby as early as possible and it all went to plan. I was out of bed wandering around after 2 days, driving after 4 weeks and I swear the homeopathy made the whole recovery experience so much easier and quicker.

Whatever you decide, good luck. Go with your instincts!

Original poster

Flo23 · 22/08/2007 20:41

loopyredangel,having growth scan to estimate the weight of baby.If this one is going to be as large as DS then I think section is the safest option for delivery.Although if I was induced then that might reduce the birth weight by a couple of lbs..
Thanks mamawhyte,feel like concerns over how the baby is going to be born are overshadowing the rest of my pregnancy.Need to think more about how I can't wait to meet it and look forward to being with the baby,rather than just how it will come out!

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chipkid · 22/08/2007 20:45

I had third degree tear. It healed well. At later consultation with very respected consultants (bottom one and gynae one!) I was advised to have a section.

Worse case scenarios given to me were double incontinence.

So had elective with dd and it was fab. I had a three year old to care for as well as new baby and it is not that bad. The first couple of weeks are hard-but you will have help then. After that it really wasn't a problem for me.

tough decision-but I would def have a section particularly if big baby

aloha · 22/08/2007 20:55

I had elective twice (first time with complete placenta praevia) and both times was up really quickly. Home after two days with dc2, feeling fine. Driving within two weeks both times (took that long to get out of the door with dc1!) and fast recovery. I personally insisted on a cs for baby no2 and having experienced an overnight labour with her (back to back) the caesarean was the ONLY Ok thing about her arrival and going into labour was disgusting and traumatising to me, at least partly due to appalling lack of care.
BUT I was unlucky. What do YOU want to do? When you fast forward to having the baby what makes you feel anxious and what makes you feel safe? Go forward two years, what do you wish you'd had, or don't you care?

loopyredangel · 22/08/2007 20:59

I wish my consultant was as supportive, I had a big baby first time, he was 10lb 9.5oz, had to have ES, he wasn't coming out, too much damage to my pelvis. I haven't been offered a growth scan!

Original poster

Flo23 · 22/08/2007 21:15

My overwhelming thought after having DS was that I wished I'd had caesarian.He ended up on special care for 2 days with breathing diffs,he was taken very shortly after I got out of theatre after being sutured.Breastfeeding was also a nightmare due to my limitations post delivery,our separation and his weight to maintain!
Think perhaps the answer to my dilemma is becoming clearer.. The thought of going in,having normal delivery and home again without too much disruption is appealing,but possibly ending up with long term probs that could last alot longer than c/s recovery certainly isn't.

OP posts:

blueshoes · 22/08/2007 21:40

yes, Fio, I see electives as locking in your risk somewhat. Not great, but it is a controlled environment and you can plan around your recovery.

For natural, it could be wonderful, or much much worse than section.

I have had 2 sections, first crash, second elective. I don't think about the births much. No trauma to get over. No physical issues, beyond the scar.

Bubble99 · 22/08/2007 21:52

I'd go for the elective, if I were you.

Have had all types. One normal spontaneous delivery, one induction, one emergency CS and one elective CS.

I was ok with a 20 month old and a baby plus two older DCs and you will have your dh home with you for the first 2 weeks. I found I healed really quickly after the elective, though not so well with the emergency.

mamawhyte · 22/08/2007 21:58

Definately DON'T spend months agonising over it - that was the worst mistake I made. I felt that I could actually enjoy my pregnancy and look forward to holding my baby after I'd made my "instinctual" decision. My instincts were telling me not to have a "natural" birth but I kept ignoring them - I didn't recognise that whilst I was agonising, only once I truly gave the c-section option a chance to be heard.

Choose your path and make it the best it can possibly be within your own control, but don't obsess over it like I did, if you can help it - it was no good for baby or me, or hubby or DD1.

ThursdayNext · 22/08/2007 22:20

I had a 3rd degree tear with DS. I'm hopefully opting for normal delivery this time(only 15 weeks pregnant so far), although like you I was offered an elective CS. However, I didn't find the delivery traumatic with DS despite the tear, and the tear occured for different reasons to you.DS was not a big baby, he was 3 weeks early but in awkward back to back, arm over head position needing forceps.
I think I'm meant to have some kind of anal scan (oh joy) to assess the healing first though? Did they suggest this with you? I was told that this would assess the scar and if healing wasn't good then a CS would be recommended to reduce the risk of incontinence. If the scar has healed well, which I think it has, then normal delivery should be safe.
It's such a personal decision, I'm keen to have a normal delivery if it's safe but the reasons for my tear are hopefully unlikely to be repeated.
Definitely focus on the baby being here and try not to obsess about how he/she gets here. I like that phrase a mumsnetter used 'have baby, have tea and toast'!

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