young mum in need of some advice on pain.... please!!!

[charlotte121]

heya, i gave birth on june 17th to my little boy weighing 7lb 4 and had a normal delivery with just gas and air but then after the birth was told i had a 3rd degree tear. i didnt understand y this had happend as i am young, healthy and had done everything i was told to. it felt very unfair that i had gone through all the pain of labour only to end up needing a spinal block and an opperation. i thought once i had had the surgery things would b ok but they were far from it. i couldnt get comfey at all even with pain releif, it made breast feedin impossible as i found the pain of sitting for half an hour to feed too much!
i bathed everyday and the stitches healed up really well but the pain has only got worse. i have been taking lactulose to help but was told at my 6 week checkup to lower my dose, i was also given some stronger pain relief to help but its not always hugely effective. my baby is almost 8 weeks old now and i dont know how much more i can take. i dread having to go to the loo as it feels like im trying to pass huge scratchy rocks and i just feel the pain gets in the way of me enjoying my beautiful son. i just wondered if any1 had some advice as doctors seem very un-supportive. pleases help im desperate. charlotte x

HI c121,

sorry to hear youre in so much pain. The huge scratch rocks thing sounds like internal piles to me.

Is the pain youre gettting from the stitches?

Could be piles, but sounds more like a fissure to me - this is a crack in the wall of your anus and it hurts like buggery (oh god that was such a bad choice of words )

Here's what you need to do, go to the GP. Ask to be referred back to the hospital consultant. Explain you think that they have 'missed something' during surgery. They will get spooked about the possibility of litigation and see you. You may have to have a pipe put up your bum to have a looksee but it's a lot better than putting the pain (ummm a sigmundoscopy I think it's called). Anyway, if it's a fissure it can be treated.

Drinking a lot of water can help ease things through and prevent pain which can be caused by constipation.

Sounds like you might also benefit from going through your birth notes with a midwife - you can ask the hospital to arrange this - it can help you to understand what happened - I did this after a traumatic delivery and it made a huge difference not only to how I was feeling but how I related to DD.

Good luck!

I had the huge scratchy rocks but I called it 'shitting glass'. But that was from piles. Perhaps you have those as well as the 3rd degree tear - the tear healed but the piles carrying on? And the pain only when you poo, which happens with piles. Mine were agony for 4 months before I noticed any improvement. I burnt my hand gripping the radiator next to the loo once, the pain from my bum was so bad I didn't notice my hand.
Have you seen your GP specifically about this problem and pain, as at a 6 week check its just general questions.
Can you get in touch with the surgeon who did the stitching up to ask what is normal?

im not sure... when i went to my 6 week check up the doctor did an internal examination of that area which was excrutiating, and she said everything was fine. i have heard that the pain from a 3rd degree tear can last upto 4 months i just hope this isnt true. it seems a shame that the pain would last this long. im very disapointed in the doctors, i feel very let down. im only 19 and i think there has been a pre-conception about me being a young mum.

Charlotte - yes, it can take a while to heal but you shouldn't have to put up with pain - regardless of what your age is. Can you go and see another doctor in the practice? Or just go back and say you aren't happy and want a referral. You need to kick up a bit of a fuss. Don't worry about being rude, you need to get this sorted.

It is worth it in the end - motherhood I mean!

thankyou everyone!! its so nice to have some advice, i finally feel that i maybe i might have an answer to whats been going on. im definatley going to go bk to the doctors and get some help. i really appreiate being treated like a human again. thakyou all for ur advice
charlotte x

You are welcome. Here's some info that may help in the interim:

treatment of anal fissures (also works for piles)

Perineal tears

congrats. Sorry you having probs. My pain got worse from my stitches, doc checked it got infected and antib cleared it up, but it didnt feel like what you describing more throbbing. Hope you get it sorted

thanks whomovedmychocolate i really think that this fissure thing might b the answer. i was looking on the net and the symptoms compleetly match what i am gpoing through. im so pleased that i have an answer so that i might b able to end the agony im going thru! most grateful!!!! u cannot believe! charlotte x

Glad to help. These things are fixable btw. Honestly though, try upping the amount of water you drink for a week and see how much it helps. I did this and it made a huge difference (the difference between sitting on the loo crying and not if I recall correctly )