Having an elective section today with no.2 and I'm currently sat in bed crying about how my 2 year old will react, how did your toddler react when they first saw baby ?

[Loudloopy]

Currently lying in bed sobbing and overthinking how my toddler (2years 3 months) will react, I'm so scared he will feel like I don't love him anymore or feel pushed out, I just want him to be excited and hopefully not feel these ways ! I sound such a drama queen I just hope he adapts well to the new baby

Thanks in advance guys

It will be fine. He is likely to be curious then uninterested, and he will rapidly forget what being an only one felt like. And you are about to give him one of the greatest gifts a person will ever have - a sibling to play with, fall out with, explore with... and to support and love each other all their lives.

Totally normal! I remember lying in my toddler’s bed putting him to sleep in early labour and quietly crying. I felt like I had betrayed him. Three years later and they are thick as thieves. They fight a lot, but they also have a really lovely relationship and it’s so wonderful to see

I was very emotional about leaving my DS to have DS2 via section - exactly the same age gap btw! - it didn’t help that it was the first time I’d been away from him over night in any case he really wasn’t that bothered about his brother when he came to see us, or tbh seeing me but that was down to the hospital setting and he was very excited when we both came home on day 3. They’re the best of friends now - 4&2 - honestly they get on so well and always hug and tell each other love you ❤️

Good luck!

DD1 was just 3. Interested, wanted to hold DD2, big novelty value, then wanted a cracker.

The DTs are 15 mos now and although they piss her off frequently, she loves having siblings. Just focus on all the positives you are giving your dc, a lifelong bond, a playmate and support when you are gone. It is a great gift.

Also let's be honest, not much you can do about it now

She loved him ❤️

Brought her toys over to show him, and gave him a nickname that only she has ever been allowed to use.

It'll be fine. This is a lovely time in your life!

Oh Loudloopy I recognised you from your previous similar thread I commented on. I know it’s hard but please please stop worrying! Don’t let this overshadow meeting your new baby. Your DS will adapt fine. Go gently, don’t force the connection if he’s not interested, praise him lots in front of the baby and make sure you keep his routines as much as you can. You’ll have ups and downs but I’m sure DS will surprise you by how sweetly interested he is in his new baby sibling.

I have 22 months between my older 2 and to be honest it’s such a young age they accept the new sibling as the new normal pretty quickly. My 2 now squabble quite a lot but do play together all the time. It’s a great age gap as now they do a lot of the same activities and have similar interests.
Honestly it will be absolutely fine. You just need to be a bit mindful of giving your older child lots of cuddles and getting your partner to hold the baby just so it’s no you always holding it.

Oh and there was exactly the same age gap too. Sometimes they napped at the same time, it was magical when that happened

One of my guilty pleasures are feel good videos. My current favourite are those that show older siblings meeting their newborn siblings for the first time. I'm a grown woman and they make me cry theyre so lovely. Get watching some of those!

Good luck!

I had two years and six weeks between my two. My eldest was really excited to meet his brother. We'd really played it up before 9 had him, he was going to be a big brother now etc. We'd told him the baby's name and everything so he knew very soon he would have a brother.

The first meeting at the hospital was hard, mainly because I had to stay and DS had to leave. But he got a present 'from his little brother' and mainly spent the time playing with that!!

When we got home, he came running over to DS2 in his car seat, really excited to see him and said his name. I remember reading somewhere about having mother and new baby separate when they first meet so did that. Baby was in the car seat and I sat so DS1 could give me a cuddle.

Honestly, I think this is a great age gap to have. My boys are 4 and 6 now and eldest doesn't remember a time without his brother. They get on each other's nerves at times, but they are really close. I think it's one of those things, if you can acknowledge that your eldest is going to be put out for a bit, talk to them about how they feel about it and reassure them lots, it will be fine.

Ah don't worry! My DD was 2 when DS was born. She was very curious about him. I remember her looking alarmed when he first cried. Because newborns sleep so much I could still give her a lot of attention. It was only when he got to about 18 months that they started fighting over toys!

Mine with a similar gap was entirely uninterested. Not upset, but didn't care. He just wanted my grapes!

I've got a 2y gap and honestly words cannot describe how disinterested dd1 was when DD2 arrived she liked making the baby toys sing and enthusiastically rocking the swing seat but dd2 may as well have been a doll. They're 6 and 4 now and dd1 reacts far more badly now when they fall out.

My two have a larger gap but a friend of mine had hers 18m apart.

2nd child born overnight at home, so 1st woke up to be shown the baby. "Huh" and she ignored the baby mostly for a few weeks. Now she adores the baby and loves her.

You'll be fine xx

Oh yes similar to other poster I came into the house by myself and DH bought in DS2 so I could greet DS1 with a big hug and make a fuss of him.

Honesty I had months of “what have I done” and feeing awful for taking my full attention from DS1 but once DS2 was here - and a couple of weeks had passed! - those feelings went away

It was love at first sight for my two. 21 months gap and she did tantrum a fair bit while she adjusted but always was totally smitten with ds. I do feel that she lost something that day as she wasn’t ‘the baby’ and centre of everything any more but she gained so so much. A best friend, a sidekick, a partner in crime. Good luck today.

Don’t worry OP, he’ll be fine. My DD1 was 23 months when DD2 was born. When MiL brought her into the hospital when we were leaving she was completely indifferent. It then transpired that she was at the beginning of norovirus (which was a really fun couple of days!) anyway when she recovered she was absolutely fine. DH and I made sure to make a fuss of her. She did have her moments; when my mum and dad would come round she would try to push DD2’s pram at them to take her with them

As soon as DD2 could ‘do things’ it was a game changer though. One of my favourite memories is DD2 sitting in her jumparoo and DD1 running in front of her with DD2 screaming in laughter! To watch their sibling bond form and grow was and is amazing!

Good luck for the birth and enjoy

I felt the same at the end of my second pregnancy. I needn't have worried. DD was asleep when I came home so didn't meet DS until the morning when she lent in the Moses basket and announced 'he is my baby' and thus began a relationship based on dominance which DS is remarkably accepting of.

I would recommend making sure you get some alone time with DC1 in the coming weeks. I remember the points where DD got a bit resentful it was aimed at me rather than DS. I took to leaving snoozing DS with DH in one room whilst DD and I did a bit of craft or baking in the other.

Enjoy the baby snuggles and the big introduction.. you're witnessing the start of the longest relationship your DCs will have.

Have you got a gift for your older child from the new baby? My son was more interested in that! But he was adorable when if was time for us to leave, he was only 3 but he very carefully got the car seat ready for his little sister.

Don't forget that newborns sleep most of the time, so the transition is actually quite gentle.

In case this story helps: my son was seriously ill in hospital the week before his sister was born. Wired up in HDU and I didn't leave his side all week, he had been terrified and in great pain at times. I went into labour as he slept in his hospital bed; it was beyond awful leaving him asleep. Despite all of that he absolutely dotes on his little sister. I am sure your children will love each other just as much.

Best wishes for today

I had ds2 when my first was 15months he came into see us when i had him in hospital and he was just really curious when we came home i do the same as a pp put the car seat down and had a cuddle with ds1 let him see him in the car seat ect they are now 3 and 2 and are the best of friends they do fight alot over little things but they love each other so much its just lovely to see i do remember feeling really bad on ds1 when i was going into labour i thinks its just the unknow but once your home and keeps things as before its just fine. Congratulations hope all goes well

2 years 1 month between my boys and DS reacted with utter delight. Stood staring, pointing and laughing.
The day I got back home he woke in the night and I went into his room carrying the baby. As soon as he saw him he burst out laughing again.
So happy.
And he really enjoyed helping. "Quick, get the wipes! Baby needs a toy! Where's the dummy?!"
I bought DS a doll and pushchair and we would take "the babies" round the block together.

Oh OP, everything will be fine! My son 2Y 8M was so excited as we carried the car seat into the house for him to first meet his brother after my ELCS. He still remembers that day now aged 4, it did help that baby brother bought him a Playmobil fire engine that he had wanted for ages! Baby is now 18 months and they get along so well! Wishing you the best for today Xxx