C section or natural

[Ellikopter]

Hi I'm due my little girl on 27th May. I have a 4 year old son and his birth was horrible, ended up with emergency c section after 30 plus hours in labour , failed forceps, stuck in pelvis. Heartbeat dipping cord around his neck. They have given me option of choosing how I want to give birth but I'm torn on which to try any suggestions will be appreciated

I would try for natural because it'll be hard work looking after your 4 year old when you've had a c-section. Is there anything to suggest that this birth will be a bad one too?

No nothing it's just because how bad I had it first time round I'm too scared to go natural but I know the recovery is worse with a section. My hubby wants me to have a section too but he doesn't seem to understand that he would have to take on a lot more to help me. I've got until 9th May to decide. I just can't seem to decide which I want there's pros and cons for either

I've got a 4 year old and a 4 week old

Had emergency c section with my 4 year old (72 hours in labour, breech, baby in distress quite traumatic) and chose to have an elective C section with my 4 week old.

I've been fine. I explained to my DD why I would be be able to do certain things and told her why. She has been fab. Recovery has also been fine and from day three I've been pretty much 100%. I keep having to take it easy because I forget I've had major surgery.

I get that I'm not your every day example (I was exactly the same after my emergency section though).

Best decision I've made. I couldn't go through labour again to end up in the same position. The emotional journey of that (as well as everything else) still upsets me today

Just from a recovery point of view - natural. I had 2 natural births, the 1st one I had a 3rd degree tear, the 2nd one was a shoulder dystocia birth - ventouse, episiotomy, legs somewhere behind my head & people pressing on my stomach & hands in. 3rd was an elective CS due to polyhydramnious. The pain afterwards was incomparable- even oramorph didn't touch the sides (I was sterilised at the same time so don't know if that made a difference). If I had to do it again (thank god I don't) I'd definitely try natural if it was safe to do so.

I have done both. The section took more recovery but I think much less than an emergency section would. Natural can cause problems too (cuts etc). If I was going again I would go natural but would probably feel different if I had had an emergency section first time around. The planned section was a much nicer birth experience but the recovery was that bit worse. Good luck with it, x

If you're scared and think you can't go through that again then go for the c-section

I found that knowing when my c section would be well in advance allowed me to plan my older child’s care during and after the birth. The biggest problem (after the initial 2wks when my husband was home) was not being able to drive to nursery, but a combination of friends helping and taxis worked fine for us. Only you can make your birth choices, but for me, the c section worked as I was able to plan support afterwards. Good luck.

I had a similar experience with dc1. I went elective with dc2 although ended up going into labour first so was an other emergency. My recovery was extremely easy (both times from a physical perspective), was pushing the pram on the 3 mile round trip to preschool by week 2.

What was your first recovery like? What position was the baby in? Part of the reason I chose elective with my 2nd was that they couldn't explain why he got stuck. He was relatively small, albeit with a large head but was in a good position by the time they tried forceps and was tolerating labour absolutely fine, they just couldn't get him out. I apparently have a less than stellar pelvis and a tendency to produce huge headed babies.

My son was 9lb 7 oz

They also said that I had a narrow pelvis so I'm just panicking that this one is going to be bigger and have same issues

I had a c section with a 3 year old at home and then another with a four year old and nearly 18 month at home

The recovery was quick but i think thats mainly because it was elective

I think dh had two weeks off both times and obviously things like housework and clothes washing slid, i drove after 2 weeks

I did want a natural birth with both

For me the worry would be how stressed you might be during the rest of the pregnancy and during labour

What about booking a later date, say 40 + and then seeing what happens? A friend of mine did that for her 3rd c-section and they were fine with that.

Are you getting a later scan? I know they can be inaccurate but mine was spot on with my 2nd. That might give you an idea although I was told it's head size not weight which is the issue. Both mine had heads on greater than the 90th percentile.

I had a natural birth with my first. Was. Terrible experience and told a very long time to recover (he's just turned 3).

I had a planned section with my second 11 weeks ago and it was Brill. Procedure was fine, I felt in control and well looked after. Also, my recovery has been a million times better than the first time. I found the pain really manageable and after a few days, it really started to ease off and within a week or two I didn't need anything at all.

Good luck, I hope you go with what's best for you x

emergency c section after 30 plus hours in labour , failed forceps, stuck in pelvis. Heartbeat dipping cord around his neck.

Sorry, that sounds horrible.

Might help to read up on the guidelines they follow for VBAC. Once you're in established labour they put limits on how long they let you labour so wouldn't be 30 hours again. And the cord round the neck thing is a fluke rather than something that's bound to recur.

Maybe talk to hospital about the forceps and stuck in pelvis about likelihood of this happening again.

I'm opting for VBAC with DC2, DC1 is 2 1/2. There are strong pros and cons either way but for me hope of easier recovery and better start to breastfeeding have swung it. You can ask for c-section during labour if you feel it's going on too long etc, obv no guarantee you'll get it though!

A 4 year old is probably not lifted so much, I'd also struggle to not lift DD into car, cot, toilet etc.

I'd definitely go for the natural birth option. I had a c section with my third and it was no fun with 2 toddlers and a baby to look after 🙈 you have to remember that no 2 births are the same and that this one could well be a breeze!

Ps that's my daughters birthday, great day to have a baby 👍🏼

I think I would try for natural if you feel you can.

I had a c section back in January and found the first couple of days at home agony. Just getting in and out of bed was an event and in fact so painful the first two nights I tried to sleep sat up in nursing chair.

I am also 14 wks post c section tomo and my wound is still not healed. Having to make trips to hospital every other day to have it dressed in the beginning because of infection after infection was not fun with a newborn and unable to drive myself.

The thing is OP, you'll always find someone with a terrible or a brilliant experience of either CS or natural birth. Either one can go very well or a bit awry.

I think a good natural birth is preferable to CS but CS is preferable to a difficult birth. You don't really get to choose which you get though, so it's a gamble.

If I were you, I'd be asking about your specific risk of the same problems recurring.

I vote elective section always.
Based solely on my own experience.
Elective nothing like as bad as emergency after horrible labour IME.

TBH while I know many many women have totally healthy natural births, my experience has altered me so much I just can’t envisage it happening to me!

@HoustonBess I 100% agree.

I'm in a similar position OP, 9 hours of induction following my waters having broken spontaneously and I progressed to half a cm dilated! Baby became distressed so was born by emcs. Was swimming in merconium and had an infection (as did I). I then got pre-eclampsia. We were in hospital for 2 weeks.

A friend had a VB following spontaneous labour, forceps delivery, some severe tearing and is still in pain from birth injuries 3 years later. No reason for it, just bad luck.

There is no one way that is guaranteed to end up with a better experience or recovery. I'm going for an elective at 39 weeks this time but we've agreed that if I go into spontaneous labour early and it is progressing well then I'll try VBAC. My main aim is to minimise the chance of another emcs.

Good luck whatever you decide.

Thanks everyone for your input and thoughts I just don't know what to do I'm so scared at the thought of natural but I know I would never know what having a natural birth is like :( so 50/50 atm lol x

Really hard choice as it cld al go to plan naturally and recovery good.

I had emergency section and midwife told me other deliveries would also be section in the future, although if I pushed it I think they would let me try.

I don't want to though, can you imagine going through all that again and ending up with an emergency section. For me not worth the risk. Planned section is supposed to be a lot calmer and recovery better.

If I were in your shoes I'd choose a section esp as your child will be 4, old enough to understand that they can't jump on you and your still not very well after the baby arrives.

I had a friend that wanted to prove she cld do it. She ended up with really bad vaginal delivery with tear and said her emergency section recovery was much easier. She had another and this time went for a section, said it was much better.

Please don't worry about not having the experience of natural. While I would rather it in terms of recovery, I personally thought the planned section was a lovely experience. I would go so far as to say nicer.

My c section was elective due to complications and was the best experience I could hope for. Quick and painless and recovery was trouble free.

Elective and emergency are very different! I really don't know why anyone would want a natural birth if they could avoid it. Although.. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Your body, your choice.

My first was an EMCS - I was quite chilled all the way through labour for 2 days, just thought it was taking a while as it was my first!

Once Emergency team kicked in when lost heartbeat I didn't really have much time to think about anything - but all was fine

DC2 (after 2 mc) I really wanted a vbac but agreed to be measured at 36 wks ongoing per doc's advice. At 37 wks baby was way over 9lb so they gave me an estimate of 30% chance of vaginal birth, as long as I had episiotomy and ventouse or go for ELCS
I went for elective and was so much better than the emergency one. Pretty easy recovery too (ds was 9lb 8oz)

Have never done it naturally so can't comment on that but I feel
I made the right decision

I had an ELCS with my second after a horrendous first labour and delivery and frankly I recovered much quicker from the section , I even spent less time in hospital . If I had my time again I’d have both by section .