How bad

[paprickapaull]

Is child birth hard? My friend says it is but my mum says it was quite easy
What do you think?

Of course it's hard especially if you have a long labour. My first lasted 26 hours, I was so tired and in so much pain.

Different for everyone. Bad for me!

I mean I had a pretty horrendous birth resulting in PND and stitches and infections and lots of crappy stuff but I'd do it all over again if it was the only way to have my daughter.

Lots of people have a straightforward, bearable, so called 'easy' birth but it's not really something you'll get a general consensus on - it's very different for everyone!

You will get the full range of answers from very easy to agonising here - it depends on so many things.
My experience of childbirth was good, I enjoyed it and didn't find it too painful at all. A crucial factor I think was that all my labours were short so you don't have the exhaustion to deal with on top.

Had an epidural with my first and felt nothing. Didn’t like it actually and choosing a different route this time

Nobody can tell you what it will be like for you. If you are worried then look at the positive birth company or read other people’s birth stories.
Good luck!

I’ve had a mix (but nothing terrible)

First one was too long and dragged on

Second one but much more ideal time and progression wise

Third one shot out like a bat out of hell and it was absolutely traumatising

I was dead set against drugs... I think I was in denial or just couldn't comprehend how painful painful is!

I had a quick labour, barely got my breath in between contractions, was squirming. It was ridiculous. I had to have an epidural.

The only way I can describe it is that it felt like my spine was being twisted and pulled out my anus.

There's no shame in pain relief.

And honestly, when you're in the throws of it, you don't care. And you know it's not forever, and that soon you'll meet your baby and be a Mum! It's hellishly awesome!

Good luck!!

Well, I've had more relaxing days! Labour wasn't bad generally up until transition. Transition was agony. The actual birth bit was like epic constipation- just felt like baby was never going to come out and it was an impossible task. I panicked a bit - bad idea. Stitches afterwards weren't fun.

Not bad enough that I wouldn't do it again, but also definitely not fun!

No one can really tell you that.
It is hard work, but a lot of it depends on how you cope mentally. Being able to relax into it and surrender completely to the process helps enormously. Contractions hurt more if you tense up and fight them rather than breath through them and try to relax all of your muscles.
Good luck!

I knew someone who experienced labour as a stomach ache-she wondered what she had eaten. Baby was almost delivered into the loo.

I was definitely aware it was harder than that for me, but it came on gradually. My hardest labour by far was the one where I had my waters broken with an amnihook. I was in discomfort beforehand and practically on the ceiling immediately after. So I wouldn't recommend that, based purely on my experience.

It is hard work, but a lot of it depends on how you cope mentally. Being able to relax into it and surrender completely to the process helps enormously. Contractions hurt more if you tense up and fight them rather than breath through them and try to relax all of your muscles

That's about the sum of it in my experience. First labour was a painful shock (though a textbook birth), second I wasn't scared, kept breathing calmly (this is the key!) and got through it no problem. I would say it's very painful but you have it in you to get through it if you have faith in yourself.
I think the reason why many of our mothers' generation say it's "not too bad" is because they were high on pethedine which was routinely administered in the 70s and 80s!

Agree with others that it just depends. I was induced with my first and it hurt like a bitch (although totally worth it) but it was the very long recovery which was worst as that lasted much much longer than labour.

I had a planned section on 29th January and although everyone told me how hard recovery would be etc it's been an absolute doddle compared to first time.

Good luck x

Nowhere near as bad as I was expecting - pain was totally manageable for me but I guess I was just lucky!

My advice is to keep a positive outlook and an open mind and just see how you get on as regards pain relief etc. You might be fine with g&a, you might need an epidural. Either is fine!

People can only tell you how it was for them, which has no bearing on how it will be for you.
My first was really hard. 48 hours of agony. No one took the amount of pain I was in seriously as I was only 1cm dilated. Ended with ventouse as too exhausted to push. I assumed I had a low pain threshold as people were telling me it couldn’t be that painful as I wasn’t in established labour.
Second and third were a breeze in comparison. Breathed through contractions with just gas and air at the end.

For me it was the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced, but wasn’t has bad as I expected. I’ve 2 vaginal deliveries, no pain relief, one in hospital, one at home.
I found contractions worse than pushing.

It's hard work but worth it! Just try and remember lots of people have more than one...

Both your friend and your mum are right. People’s experiences are so varied and sadly you don’t know whether you’ll be one of the ones that goes through horrendous complications and pain or one of the ones that pops out babies easily. I was in the former camp but it doesn’t mean that others don’t have lovely births. Some people do.