Midwife suggesting epidural

[MrsHarker]

Hello everyone,

I'm 38+3 weeks pregnant and a FTM.

At my midwife appointment last week my midwife checked my belly measurements as I've been running about 2 weeks ahead, and then suggested an epidural as I appear to be carrying quite a big baby. She mentioned an epidural several times, which has made me a bit nervous.

I've been feeling quite positive about the birth until now (been reading positive birth book & info on hypnobirthing) and was hoping for a waterbirth with gas & air.

I was wondering if any of you have been in a similar position or have any advice? I know I need to be flexible about what happens when I go into labour, but I just feel a bit anxious and disheartened at the moment.

Thanks in advance

I think you need to keep an open mind. Try not to fix to much on any one option. I wished I had had an epidural in my second labour but I was to late and labour to fast to get one arranged. You don’t get a medal for going through childbirth with minimal pain relief.

If you have been measuring steadily two weeks ahead with no sudden change that is within normal. If your midwife had genuine concerns she should have referred you for a growth scan, and if that indicates a bigger than expected baby then it should be reviewed by an obstetrician. If there are no markers for gestational diabetes then generally the obstetrician shrugs and does nothing. Some babies are bigger than others. If your midwife hasn't referred you then measurements are presumably within normal.

Midwives (speaking as one) are human and carry emotional baggage - about the births we've had or expect to have ourselves, about the women we've cared for and the Labour's we've watched over. I don't know why your midwife is advising you to have an epidural. I would say it is always good to know your options and not to rule anything out.

If when you are contracting you want to use the pool go for it. If you don't like being in the pool then climb out and do something else. If you can't use the pool (because it's in use, meconium in waters or a plumbing failure at the hospital or anything else), bounce on a ball, kneel on a beanbag, walk around. If actually when you're in labour you think you'd rather have an epidural then have one. It doesn't actually matter to anyone else how you choose to cope.

My last baby was on the 98% centile. It was a fast and easy birth - I'm glad I hadn't had my heart set on an epidural since there wasn't time for one. I 'm kind of sad there wasn't time to run the pool though!

As others have said, just keep an open mind and see what you need in the moment. I wanted a water birth with gas and air...I changed my mind after my contractions started hard and fast but never progressed. I had an epidural, the hormone drip and managed to then push out my 9lb2oz chunky girl with no intervention and minimal damage. If I’d stubbornly insisted on continuing ‘naturally’ I would have ended up with an emergency section for failure to progress.

Also, the epidural was fantastic

Another vote for an epidural. I had a full on home birth was water, candles and gas planned. I was going to hypnobirth the shit out of it. Reality turned out to be an emergency blue light to hospital with all the drugs and a c-section. Point being, childbirth is hard work and for some of us (myself included) just not possible without a bit of help. You just don't know what's going to happen. The good news is you forget it all about five minutes afterwards.

If you are hypnobirthing get plenty of practise in which should help with anxiety

It's good that you have the option but you may find you don't need it when you're actually in labour. Many people give birth to big babies with no problems.

Please don't let what the midwife said worry you, it was only a suggestion.

I’m quite surprised at your midwife.
Just relax, enjoy the final few days / weeks of your pregnancy and see how everything goes as you go into labour / are induced as nobody can say. Unless you are having an elective c section there is a great deal that can happen. You might want one, you might not need one you might not get a one if you’re too far down the line etcetc.

I’ve had three babies and all without epidural. The easiest was my biggest baby she was 9 lbs 8 oz. it the other two weren’t far off this weight.

Best of luck

I was ten days over with a btb baby and really wanted an epidural. But after three days of slow labour I went from constant 12 minute apart contractions to 5 to 2 minutes in under four hours and in those four hours I was sent home twice and told my labour would slow down and stop that baby wasn't coming that night. In the end when I finally was admitted I was pushing twenty minutes after being through the door so I didn't have time to have an epidural even though I wanted one.

Anyway point is! Try and stay positive and calm. Birth will be what it will be as long as you stay calm and open to your options you'll get through it in the best way you can.

Thank you all so much, I'm really grateful for the info and advice. I know that birth preferences are only preferences, and I'll certainly try to keep an open mind and go with what's recommended on the day.

I'd like to be mobile for as long as I can as I think that will help me feel more in control, but I know the most important thing is that this little human exits my body in as safe a manner as possible.

I think I just freaked out at the prospect of squeezing out a big baby, I was hoping for a mr average for my first

I squeezed out a 10lb9oz first baby. You’re going to be fine.

Grrrr. I hate this. Way to undermine someones faith in their own body. I’m not a community midwife but meet women on delivery suite. I go through the analgesic options available and then make a point of explaining to the woman that I won’t offer them anything so not to wait for that point but all they have to do at any stage is ask and I will get whatever they ask for. I explain that I don’t want them to think that I don’t think they’re coping because they are the best judge of that and so they should be the ones to decide when they need pain relief. I’m happy at any stage to discuss pros and cons but only at the woman’s instigation after that point.

Just to say OP, that I also wanted to be mobile as much as possible and it was actually the epidural that made that possible for me. My contractions started in the evening and were long and hard from the start so I ended up too exhausted to get up and about to progress my labour. I never wanted an epidural originally but when it came to the crunch, it helped me hugely. It took the pain away but I was still completely mobile so it allowed me to nap to regain my strength, then to get up and walk around/bounce on the ball etc and kick my labour into gear.

Not to say you should have one necessarily, I just wanted to share because I’d always assumed epidurals meant being immobile and I wish someone had told me otherwise.

Thank you everyone, it's helpful to hear positive experiences of epidurals and large babies!

@Verbena87 that is truly reassuring, got to remind myself my body was built for this!

I'm very grateful for the info, looking forward to updating soon when he is here

‘ginswinger I was going to hypnobirth the shit out of it’ that has given me a much needed laff right now!

I was much the same and was happy with how it went at home for first millions of hrs at home for planned home birth, but with no progress beyond 7cm got ambulance in and when I had to be on my back for monitoring the pain increased exponentially. Got an epidural which was not what I wanted at all due to all my hypnobirthing ideals, but actually it was amazing, I could still feel every contraction, as you are able to control the dose with a wee button, so I just had the minimum. Was able to push very effectively within 20min despite epidural. All that being said, a big baby does not mean an automatic need for an epidural. In general your body grows the baby that it can deliver. You and your baby were made for this! Youll be great. I do share the nerves as I’m planning another home birth with baby above 95th centile but my consultant has had no concerns about delivery due to size.

Hi op. I was told my second baby would be large - she was born and weighed 6lbs! Take it with a pinch of salt. Maybe she suggested epidural because she doesn't like to see women in pain? To the pp who said they were totally mobile with their epidural, not all hospitals off er a mobile epidural. You'll need to ask about this if you're interested in having one. Congrats on your pregnancy and wishing you a good birth.