Hi MrsTulkinghorn, sorry you had such a difficult time with your last baby. It sounds really traumatic. From what you've said it sounds like a fairly classic cascade of intervention, going back to having the induction, which of course was necessary because of the pre-eclampsia. It's not uncommon for the syntocinon to make contractions particularly painful so that you need an epidural. This in turn can cause further problems because of being immobile, and increase the chances that forceps will be needed. Long labour, big babies and instrumental deliveries all increase the likelihood of postpartum heamorrhage and the forceps and lying down increase the likelihood of tearing.
I think you stand a really good chance of having a better experience this time. If you don't develop pre-eclampsia, what's the problem with using the birth centre? Is it on the main hospital site or would transfer take a while? If it's within the same building then help would be close at hand if you should need it. Sometimes birth centres turn away 'high risk' women in case they make their stats look bad, which is understandable as it can put the whole unit at risk - not much comfort to you though! I think it would be worth pressing the case to use the birth centre if your pregnancy remains straightforward and you go into labour spontaneously. You could even call their bluff a bit and threaten to have a home birth if they refuse which can sometimes cause a dramatic shift in policy!
If the birth centre option remain a no-go then again, assuming a normal pregnancy, I think it would be worth having a frank discussion with the doctors and the midwives to make sure they understand your wishes. If you don't have an epidural in situ or use pethidine then in theory there is no problem with using their birth pool. I would imagine their concerns will be a)they will probably want to do continuous monitoring because you're 'high risk' and b) they may be concerned about another heamorrhage. It's worth bearing in mind that continous monitoring has not been shown to improve outcomes for the baby. If intermittant monitoring picks up concerns, then it's a different story obviously but be aware that monitoring 'just in case' does increase the likelihood that you'll end up with interventions again. You could also negotiate getting out of the pool for the second stage in case you do haemorrhage again, but if you have a straightforward birth then chances are you won't, but it might make them more likely to agree to use of the pool. Sadly it's one of the things they can withold whether or not you give informed consent.
Whether or not you get the go-ahead to use the pool and are on the monitor, staying mobile and upright will help your labour progress and should help you deal with the contractions too. You could also stay at home for as long as you feel able to in the hope that your labour will be well-progressed when you get to hospital and there's less time for unncessary interferance.
If you do need induction again, or need sytnocinon for some reason, then don't feel as though you are destined to have the same experience as last time. You might want to negotiate taking the induction very slowly, giving you time to build up some tolerance to the contractions as they increase in strength. If you do need an epidural again hopefully the mobile one will work this time and enable you to keep upright which may be particularly helpful in the second stage as it opens up the pelvic outlet and make it less likely that you will need an instrumental delivery.
Phew, sorry that ended up so long. As the others have said, I think a doula could be really helpful in supporting you and making sure your wishes are heard and she may be able to come to antenatal appointments with you to give some support if you're trying to negotiate stuff with the medical staff in advance. I hope it goes well for you this time!