Stitches after childbirth

[Mollywobbles82]

I'm due DC2 in a few days and booked for a homebirth.

Had a second degree tear with DC1 (hospital birth) and got stitches, which healed fine. My memory of it mostly asking the MW if I could wait a little while - I was told no. She encouraged me to hold my newborn DD while she got on with the job which I just felt was not something I was able to do! It seemed to take ages and I got through it on the G&A and as such could not have been holding the baby at the same time. Feeling that the last thing I wanted for this procedure was an audience, I gave her to my DP and sent them both into the next room.

Anyway, even though I mostly look back on the birth as a positive experience, I feel a little sad that I missed that first hour with her. I have no idea whether my experience was typical or not. If you had stitches after the birth, how soon did they do it? Would there have been a clinical reason why the stitching HAD to happen then? I would like to think that this time, if the situation arises I will be empowered enough to tell, rather than ask, the MW that I will be waiting til I feel ready but if you'd asked me last time I would have thought I'd be able to do so. Perhaps I had used up all my empowerment by that point. Thanks in advance for any experiences.

I had a second degree tear stitched, I'm not sure exactly how long after, but I'd guess around an hour?

My baby was taken out the room at birth for some help with his breathing, he came back in half an hour or so later, and the midwife didn't stitch until we'd had some skin to skin and he'd had a feed. DP took him over and held him on the bed while I was stitched up (was offered gas&air but I was given a local anaesthetic injection and found I was fine with just that). People kept popping in to check things whilst she was stitching though, which wasn't massively dignified (pediatrics to check baby, the lady making the toast...) though personally I didn't care at that point!
She did have a look pretty much straight after to decide what needed doing though, so maybe it depends on the severity of the tear? I think second degree can cover quite a wide range. Might also depend on staffing/hospital policy?
If you're meeting/have met your homebirth midwives it might be worth bringing up with them beforehand, just to check what they think?

Thanks for your reply. You're right, I should raise it with the mw. Stupidly, I just feel awkward talking about it face to face. Also, no one discussed the tear with me at the time (I only know it was 2nd degree from looking through my notes and seeing a check box) so I don't know what I'd usefully be able to tell her as I obviously no longer have the notes. I should just find a way to bring it up at my next appointment. I don't know why I feel so awkward discussing these things, especially in the knowledge that I'll be living the reality of them in the coming days.

Two of my three births required stitches for second degree tears They were done pronto ( say ten minutes after placenta delivered / bit of latching on and snuggles) and I handed the baby to dad as I hit the gas and air
I assumed there were valid clinical reasons to do with further blood loss, oxygen or nerve supply to damaged very sensitive delicate tissue or damage, trust policy / nice guidelines Actually i have very fond memories of sucking the g and air and prattling on while weeping for joy looking at my not so little newborn sons ( ironically my daughter was the largest and no stitches at all)

I didn’t dwell on the fact I wasn’t holding my boys during that time I just let them get on with it.

Good luck and hope you have a lovely homebirth

I had 2 second degree tears and a graze 'that needed a stitch' (nice!). The it's all a bit of a blur. The mw didn't feel she could do the stitches so a registrar did them. It will have been within a hour of ds being born I think, but time moved differently-ds was born at lunchtime and we didn't go up to the ward until after 7pm so there's a lot of lost hours. I remember them encouraging me to hold ds whilst they did the stitches but I just couldn't trust myself with him and I remember feeling like i'd let him down by handing him over to dp.
Fortunately with dd I didn't need any.

2nd degree stitches done immediately after delivering placenta, while I held baby under my tshirt for cuddles. I didnt have gas and air though, so maybe that’s why my hand were free. Think I was sick of the stuff after using so much to push

I'm sorry you felt that way indubiousbattle. I guess that's how I felt too. I am struggling to understand why they would encourage or expect mothers who have v recently given birth to hold and care for their newborn whilst receiving stitches to their perineum. I cannot imagine anyone suggesting something equivalent to a man requiring stitches to the scrotum or similar.

I had stitches with ds that were done asap as they were struggling to stem the blood.

The midwife even went rooting around for any bits of leftover placenta because I was apparently bleeding like a stuck pig. It was just because I had three tears (2nd front and back and a 'graze' that didn't need a stitch).

I had an epidural though which hadn't completely worn off so I didn't feel much except a top up of local.

Ds needed to be cleaned before I got him because he had meconium in his waters but after that I held him while they stitched me up, with dp hovering by my head in case he needed to take him

I had three tares and one was an artieial bleed. They had to do them straightaway as I was loosing so much blood. Then I had to go to surgery for a full repair.
I imagine the concern is blood loss

I had a 3a tear with DD, stitched pretty much straight away. DH was in theatre with us, and he held her right by me (except when I wax throwing up!)

Molly I'm sorry you feel like this, it's tough when something negative can take over a massive amount of positive- I can easily get overtaken like that so i know what you mean.

I don't remember how long it was (I have 3 dc), I definitely had a good bit of skin to skin but I think I had stitches before their first feed.

This would be something you could put in your birth plan, and that would open up a way of discussing it with your mw. My birth plan was very minimal- I only had a few important things so if yours is anything like that it would be easily highlighted. I also echo what laelti said and you definitely should bring it up with your birthing mw at your next appt. It obviously had a dramatic effect on your recuperation and that's something your HCP will want to avoid repeating.

Have you considered doing a bit of perineal massage? I intended on doing this for dcs 2 and 3 to avoid stitched but I just kept putting it off! Wished i had though as had stitches each time- not many though tbh.

I would have loved a home birth- I hope you have a really lovely experience.

I meant to say, I didn't mind dh being in the room while I had my stitches so he did, holding the baby and I quite liked this for him as I was about to have so much skin to skin and feeding time. If the worst comes to the worst maybe you could try to view it in a more positive way, say for your dh to have his skin to skin time?

I had the stitches straight after. Generally with stitches I think they have to be done within a few hours to ensure the wound knits and I imagine to reduce the risk of infection as soon as possible. My baby was placed on me for maybe 5 minutes before they wisked her away for half the night as she needed antibiotics. I'm not sure I exactly held her but I was glad I got to see her before they took her away. I think skin to skin is important for baby at that stage so it may be why they encourage you to hold the baby.

They have to be done within a certain timeframe after the year occurred due to increased risk on infection.

For example, if you cut your hand at home and take a while to go to a&e, then they take an hour to see you, unless you are bleeding profusely, they'll give you 24hrs of antibiotics before they'll stitch as they risk closing in the infection.

So you tear, have baby, wait a while for placenta to be delivered, baby gets checked over, mifwife gets instruments and you are already close to the safe time, especially as it takes a while to do. Sewing up after 24 hrs of antibiotics increases risk of poor closure and an unpleasant aesthetic.

Hope that helps.

I had a 2nd degree tear with DS1 which still felt tender at times when I had DS2. I assumed the scar tissue was weaker and would tear again.
I had a planned homebirth with DS2 and he was a much bigger baby, but I didn’t need any stitches after I had him.
I think having him at home made the whole thing less traumatic physically and emotionally.
Funnily enough, once the general soreness had gone, the tenderness of my previous stitches went with it. It was like the birth resolved the previous issue.
Fingers crossed it will be ok for you too OP.

Thank you for all the kind responses.

I had a planned homebirth with DS2 and he was a much bigger baby, but I didn’t need any stitches after I had him.

Obviously, this is outcome I'm hoping for!

I had the stitches straight after. Generally with stitches I think they have to be done within a few hours to ensure the wound knits and I imagine to reduce the risk of infection as soon as possible.

I imagine the concern is blood loss

Both of these make sense, I suppose if the mw at the time had explained the reason when she said that it had to be then, I wouldn't be wondering now. There was also a great rush to get us out of the delivery room and onto a postnatal ward after a long period of us being left there entirely alone, which I'm sure was down to either a shift change or someone else's need for the room (both understandable, although I was struggling to do anything quickly at that point) so I suppose I was wondering if the urgency of getting the stitches done was down to something like that also. I have a mw appt on Monday so assuming I'm still pg at that point, I'll find a way to discuss it then.

If the worst comes to the worst maybe you could try to view it in a more positive way, say for your dh to have his skin to skin time?

My DH and DD have the most lovely bond and have done from the start and there is certainly that upside to focus on.

DH was in theatre with us, and he held her right by me (except when I wax throwing up!)

I know it sounds ridiculous given that I will have literally just given birth but I would just feel so uncomfortable with this. I don't want anyone watching me throw up or get stitches. I would never deprive DH of being at the birth of his DC and I think once it was / is all underway I was / will be glad of his presence. He is nothing but supportive and this is entirely not about him. But in the cold light of day, I can seriously see the attraction of being left alone with one professional to get on with it. As for people who have a whole audience of spectators, a room full in some cases, even photographers, videographers (!!!), etc this is incomprehensible to me to the point that I can't even come up with a similarly incomprehensible thing to liken it to.

Last time I told DH no calls to friends & family during labour (despite their requests & expectations) and I wish I had also stipulated that I felt uncomfortable with the whole story being recounted (it was a relatively straightforward birth!) I just feel so uncomfortable with the idea of people discussing the ins and outs of what to me feels like a very private thing that I have to go through. This time we have DD to consider, so unless she miraculously sleeps through it, I will not be able to ban communications with the outside world. I also recognise it is unreasonable to expect DH not to talk about something that was / will be a big experience for him to process too, so I won't be making that request.

Ugh. I wish I didn't feel like this, I'm sure most women don't. I do feel better having offloaded here, so thanks.

Is it to do with time too? I was stitched immediately to stop blood flow, because they want to move onto the next person and because there’s no medical reason to wait. People’s feelings never especially top the list.

I found both births mentally traumatic from the invasion of privacy aspect but it’s worth it, the birth recedes. Your DH shouldn’t talk about it if it makes you feel stressed.

I was taken into a different room for my stitches, pretty much straight after placenta was delivered (which took almost an hour but that's a different story). 2nd degree tear but quite deep. DP and my friend who was at the birth stayed with DD and got her dressed. This was a MLU.

I had a tear-free home birth with DD2 and a second degree year with home birthed DS that I didn't have stitched. I think the difference was that DD2 came out slowly whereas I shoved DS out as hard and fast as I could as I just wanted it all over so I could get out of the boiling hot pool!
You may not necessarily need tears to be stitched. Mine healed fine with plenty of rest and fluids and it's all normal down there now.

Tears need to be sutured as soon as possible to reduce infection, which is after placenta has delivered and midwife has got everything ready... should be within the hour. With a waterbirth you should wait a little while after getting out of the pool to suture unless it’s bleeding excessively.

I was stitched up as soon as I’d delivered the placenta. I was holding the baby having skin to skin whilst being stitched up so didn’t use any gas & air, my DH was in the room with us (it would never have entered my mind to ask him to leave as he’d just seen me give birth and the stitches were just part of the labour/birth process to me). The stitches were the worst and most painful part of the whole thing for me!

I got my 3rd degree tear stitched up straight away whilst holding DS, I had to have forceps though and already had an epidural

I was stitched up straight after delivering placenta too, which only took a few minutes I think. I held DD on me wrapped up in a towel and then when was about to be stitched, I wasn't told not to hold her but thought if I was going to have something very painful done to me I wouldn't feel safe holding her so passed her to DH who held her in one arm and I held his hand in the other - good job too as I found the stitching process as excruciatingly painful as the ventouse delivery and no way could I have safely held DD during it. I didn't tear as such, but had an episiotomy that needed stitching.

3rd degree tear done straight away whilst holding my baby- probably less than 10 minutes after delivery of the placenta.
Had four doctors looking at me deciding whether I should go for surgery or not. Nice.
I was fine to hold my baby during, they gave me numbing injections or something I think?!

I was bleeding a lot from a bad 2nd degree tear and was stitched very soon after. I had held dd and one midwife had taken her to clean up a bit and dress. Dh says he was there and that I was still a bit high from the pethadine and unexpectedly fast delivery!!!