I’ve just learnt about a little phenomenon...

[NotTakenUsername]

...called a (bloody) ‘push present’.

I came across the idea today when I was browsing Facebook and an old acquaintance was proudly posting her bling. This trinket was apparently a reward from her husband for pushing out their baby!

A quick google tells me I must have been hiding under a rock (not like her rock, just a regular grey stone one!) because these push presents are quite the thing.

Am I alone in finding it all a bit... I don’t know... off?

Maybe this should go on feminism chat, but I thought childbirth was quite appropriate too.

Push presents have always been around. My mum got jewelry for everyone of her six kids and that was in the sixties and seventies. It's a thank you from husbands. Admittedly it may be a socioeconomic/ class thing because it involves large sums of money? I think it's a lovely gesture and I can't think why any woman would refuse one.

Margaret Thatcher had her 2 rows of pearls that Dennis bought her when she had their twins.

I don't see the problem. What's wrong with a present? It's just a sign of appreciation, isn't it?

Just like my mother still gets flowers on my and my sister's birthdays.

It was quite common for children invited to birthday parties to bring a gift and something for the birthday child's mother as well (mostly as a thank you for hosting. But also as a way of subtly honouring her part in it/giving birth, I suspect...)

It's rather normal / common imo. I think I'd be slightly surprised if I didn't get a present after giving birth. (Well, let's hope that does happen. We're TTC)

I only realized this was a thing just before DC3. Managed to talk my way into getting a ring to mark the occasion! shameless

Haha yeah I was only woman in NCT group not to get a "push present" and rather amusingly (to them) I actually gave my DH and DM presents during my labour to say thank you for being there for me!

Not much into bling but I think that's where the whole fad of pushing for a diamond comes from.

Hubby snuck a can of Sweetheart Stout into hospital for me in a coke can- dear God that was divine lol

Men wanting to honour the occasion of becoming a father by giving their DW a gift wasn't tacky, and by itself never will be.

This!

Firstly I do not get it why some posters here seem to imply that those husbands who give "diamonds" are sort of paying off and are otherwise not helpful. Mine was helping A LOT and bought me a lovely "diamond" present.

Secondly, it is confusing to read comments like "mine was so nice to me, did so and so, which is much better than diamonds". Do you really view nice treatment as a present and not daily reality??

I think it's a sweet idea....i had sections both times.... No section suprise!

No presents here! I would have been cross if dp had used up money on something unnecessary when we had saved to ensure I could take as much maternity leave as possible.

Dp was fabulously supportive though.

A pump present! Hilarious

My dh got me a dominoes if that counts ? 😆 baby was born at home at 715pm and we were in bed with all of the kids and pizzas by 930 .

I have nothing against a gift and think they could be sweet but I hate the term 'push present' and think it puts pressure on couples to get one to keep up with the Joneses.

My hubby has been amazing after having my last (our third and final) baby. I would've liked an eternity ring if money were no object but would rather we used the money on something more practical or on the kids. I might have actually been a bit annoyed if he did spend a lot on me as there's more important things we need. I love him lots even though I didn't get a present.

I know couples who did give eternity rings but the husbands didn't help out much at all with supporting their other half cope after. I'd take a man who runs the hoover round and does anything he can to help than one who doesn't but gives a pretty gift once in a while.

I made it clear to DP that I didn't want anything etc, he bought me a Pandora bracelet that I've never worn but the thought was sweet. He did help me bath and get to the loo etc but wasn't the best at doing the night shifts (couldn't at first as I was breastfeeding), however he did stay with me no matter how much I bit, dug my nails into and screamed at him. He was so very good when I was giving birth.

Fun fact, after giving birth they had to contract my womb to get lots of clots out. After that happened, DP ran to the loo and was projectile sick everywhere. He also had a nap in the bath after it was all over