Week-long latent labour - any wisdom to share?

[Trundlesaurus]

tl;dr - My wife is 38+6 today (Monday), and has been in latent labour since 1am last Monday. We've been to triage 3 times, & each time been sent home with codeine, with hospital/being horizontal disrupting previously regular contractions.

DW and I are both running pretty ragged, and I need to go back to work today to ensure I have some paternity leave left for when baby actually makes an appearance.

Anyone with similar experiences/suggestions for how I can keep being supportive as a birth partner?

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My wife is 38+6 today (Monday) - at 37+6 she started having contractions at 1am, which became regular over the course of the morning, so we headed into triage around midday. Contractions died down in the hospital, and she was told her cervix was still well up her back, and getting softer, but not dilated, so was dosed with codeine and sent home.

Contractions continued but were erratic through Tues and Wed, stopped on Thursday, then came back stronger on Friday from 3am, so we went back to triage late morning, and were told baby was back-to-back and not engaging, so DW should try polar bears to get them to turn, and was again given codeine and sent home.

Saturday was a quiet day, Sunday contractions started around 7am and became regular by 9. Trying to avoid a repeat, held out with regular, strengthening contractions until 6pm, then went to triage, only for contractions to become erratic. Then DW had to spend 3 hrs on a trace, as they wanted baby's resting heart beat (baby doesn't do still before midnight). Then codeine and home.

No wisdom but I've had very long latent labours with my last 2 dc. The only thing I'll say is it does end eventually. It's gruelling at the time though, I was in tears to one consultant. HCPs don't seem to realise just how exhausting it is contracting day & night with seemingly no end in sight. I will say both my ll's ended in induction, dc4 because my waters finally broke but labour stalled. Dc5 because my waters had broken 3 weeks before (hinds, confirmed by scan, but the built back up) & because of various other complications with the pregnancy. I'm sorry I can't give you a miracle cure. Is baby back to back? That was partly the issue with #4 & 5, my body was trying to turn them as well as get them to decend & get them out (it didn't suceed). There are exercises (look at spinning babies) that might help.

I am sorry you are in this situation. I had a 3 day labour as my baby was back to back but no-one recognised it or came up with any sort of plan so there was a lot of "first babies can take a while" and "that is just what it like first time around" when I contacted maternity assessment. In the end (after 65 hours of contractions) I was put on a drip as I was stuck at 7cms for three hours. I asked for (and got) an epidural at that point which was the right decision for me as I was shattered.

Practically speaking, if I found myself in this situation again, I would push hard (if it hasn't already been done) for the baby's position to be checked. If he/she is back to back then I would ask for a clear plan of action with timescales as leaving your wife to struggle on indefinitely doesn't seem reasonable. It may well be that a C-section (or help from a drip) is what is needed to stop your wife and the baby getting too tired, and in that case then the sooner the better. Best wishes to you all.

Thanks both - not that it's nice to hear others have gone through this too, but appreciate sound advice from those who've been there. We were told baby was back to back on Friday, but midwife today was pretty sure she felt a bum, so fingers crossed baby had turned and they might make their appearance in the next day or two.

I had a week long labour 4 days latent labour with regular contractions and 3 days active. It ended in an emcs and only because DP called a halt to labour continuing as I was in no state to continue. If I had my time again I would want the c section 3 days earlier (DS was never going to exit the normal way). The exhaustion took months to recover from, please make sure your wife gets plenty of good (not hospital food), nice drinks and rest after she's had the baby.
Insist the midwives visit at home so she's not trekking out with the new baby within three days of birth. Good luck.

I think it's always nice to know you're not alone though. I really hope baby has turned for her & either puts in an appearance soon or gives her a good break so she (& you) can rest. My DH hated watching me in pain, particularly as it wasn't leading anywhere fast. One thing that did help me was keeping in mind that however slowly it was going each contraction was doing something, even if it wasn't the dilating bit yet!

I agree with better too make sure you get home visits after, I'm rural so they're standard but if I lived in the local town I know they push you to go in but you can refuse & insist on being at home. I've found I had the best nights sleep following my ll's though despit trying to get bf established. I think because despite that I could at least get 1-3 hour chunks between, when baby slept after the 1st night that went out the window. Good luck

I had this- four days of latent labour before dd made her appearance, with three trips to the maternity ward, codeine, and attempt with a tens machine (didn’t work for me) and eventually a natural birth after an active labour of 16 hours.

Easily the most tiring experience of my life- the relief I felt when I got home and into my own bed was amazing!

Your wife is a tank for doing this for a week- fair play to her!

If you need to go back to work is there someone who could stay with your wife? My DH could stay with me and catered to my every whim- I was actually mad with exhaustion at one point so I felt I needed someone with me, even just as encouragement to stay positive.

After she has the baby, please bear in mind she could be beyond herself with tiredness- I stayed in hospital for two nights and got v little sleep there either. Once I got home DH took care of the night feeds for the first two nights and did everything around the house- that rest was essential for me to get back into full gear on day three and hit the ground running from there