Birth Plan - First Time Mum - Help

[FairyFantastic]

I'm currently looking into my birth plan. Midwife hasn't mentioned it yet but I am well over 30 weeks and want to be prepped.

I am planning for both eventualities. My mum had two c-sections, I remember my brothers birth and I have seen the effects of c-sections in the aftermath, and the idea of it does not frighten me. However, my knowledge of natural labour is limited, so I am not sure what to consider.

So far I know I don't want a forceps delivery at all. I am also considering a water birth if possible. Originally I disliked the idea due to tearing, but I figured if I'm going to tear, I'm going to tear, so may as well be comfortable for part of labour! Did you take a tankini top with you to the hospital? What drugs are available? What is gas and air like? What drugs can be used in a water birth? Any tips or tricks to cope with labour? I've looked into hypnobirthing but I just can't get into it sadly.

Finally, what else should I consider in my birth plan? Any help would be highly appreciated!

Sorry for lack of replying, I've had no wifi all day. I am overwhelmed by your feedback and really appreciate it.
katmarie oh god 3 days. Sounds like my cousin, although she was literally left on a chair in a waiting room...glad the pethidine helped!
Aloysha that's what I'm stressing. I will definitely make it clear and Threeminis I will take your advice and write down for certain about the forceps but then be open to other eventualities.
HeavyLoad thank you! I didn't realise you could get in and out. I suppose that's silly of me to assume you just had to stay there, but I feel relieved now. Good luck to you with your second, I hope it all goes well for you!
AssassinatedBeauty ahh, I didn't think of writing down about skin-to-skin
Shackup I have such a low pain tolerance but that's what I am going to tell myself. I feel like if I give into drugs early I really won't make it through! But then again, that might go out the window. Do you mind me asking about delayed clamping? I've been reading a little about it, was your hospital ok with this? Did you find it beneficial? How long was clamping delayed for?
Olivebranch thank you
MaverickSnoopy no pain relief sounds like hell! Gold medal to you m'dear!
Frautietze thanks for the advice. Do you know if midwives tell you about hospital days in the appointments or should I go straight to the hospital to enquire? My midwife didn't tell me about antenatal classes until I was 28 weeks and the classes had filled up so I'm not sure if I am meant to rely on her or not, then again I wouldn't have known they existed without her!
Joskar thanks I'll check it out
GinnyBaker I'll definitely keep the 3cm rule in mind thanks!
DryHeave I'll keep having a go at it then thanks
TonicAndTonic thanks
lizzlebizzle33 Can I ask you some of the questions I've asked another poster? Do you mind me asking about delayed clamping? I've been reading a little about it, was your hospital ok with this? Did you find it beneficial? How long was clamping delayed for? Also (sorry if I sound silly) what is the magic hour?

Thanks to everyone else! I've tried to reply to as many as possible and I appreciate everyone's experiences/advice. Good luck to anyone else having a baby too :)

OP delayed clamping just lets the baby have your blood for a bit longer, I have no way of telling if it's beneficial or not, it was just something I wanted to try... DS1 had to go back in at5 days with jaundice but DS2 was fine.

I think they do delayed clamping as standard now - at least that's what they told me but it was only something like 1 minute - I think you can request they wait longer but you wouldn't be able to have the injection that speeds up releasing the placenta to prevent hemmoraging so would check with your MW.

also to say some birthing centres offer tours so would be worth looking into this as you will be able to ask a lot of questions there and get a better understanding of how everything works.

If you can find out when the free antenatal classes are, I would just turn up as there is bound to be people who don't show up and if you have a big bump they'll prob assume you're meant to be there!

Hi, the hospital were fine with delayed clamping, I think more mums are asking for it now. I requested a5 min delay or until most of the placenta blood had passed to baby and the cord has gone white. It took about 6-7 minutes.
Like pp said I'm not sure how beneficial it was but ds1 suffered with jaundice and ds2 didn't so in my opinion it was worth it. It also allowed me to hold ds2 for that time and skin to skin straight away instead of him being taken to be weighed and checked etc.

The magic hour is the first hour after birth where baby starts its bond with mummy, relaxes and opens their eyes and starts to root for mums breast. Skin on skin in this first hour has many short and long term advantages for babies development.

I was really lucky that it was a quiet night on the ward when I had ds2 and I got to stay in the delivery suite for the whole hour with him, skin on skin. He fed straight away and fell asleep on me, it was amazing.

I wish I had done this with ds1 but I had a pethadine injection with him and he was drowsy, he slept most of the night and had to be woken for feeds. I think this added to his jaundice.
I made sure I said no pethadine in my birth plan this time.

Hope this helps!xxx

Thanks for getting back to me with delayed clamping. I think I will definitely consider it, and I would really like skin to skin straight away for as long as possible so if I'm doing that anyway I guess there's no harm in inquiring about delayed clamping too.
HeavyLoad I'll make sure to put bump on full display and try to sneak a session in haha!
Thanks all :)

In the hospital I was at in Scotland, delayed clamping, skin to skin and the magic hour are all standard.
I’d really recommend persisting with the hypnobirthing - maybe try a different book or cd - it was amazingly helpful for me. My birth plan was a set of preferences and a graduated order of pain relief but the main thing it did was mean that my DH and I were exactly on the same page. I had a slightly elevated risk of pph due to a fibroid but I was pretty confident based on the views of the sonographers that it wasn’t likely to be an issue, I agreed to a hospital rather than home birth so help was nearby if needed but I didn’t consent to a cannula in my hand ‘just in case’. They tried to tell me I needed to have it or I had to move to the labour ward but because DH knew the whole story of the risks and why I didn’t want it he was able to explain fully to the midwife, she checked with the senior midwife and it was agreed that it was OK to remain in the midwife unit without one - it was also very clearly written in my birth plan. I wouldn’t have been able to advocate for myself so well at that point so it was useful.
I had a lovely water birth (totally naked - I think in my head it was a big bath!) with gas and air and all the hippy stuff with low lights and my hypnobirthing cd. There was a scary moment when they untangled the cord from DSs neck as he was born but then he was passed to me we had a few minutes cuddle in the pool. I got out and had skin to skin with him and delivered the placenta. They then needed to stitch me so he went to DH for skin to skin and pooped on him I don’t know if our midwife unit are particularly advanced but this seemed to be standard practice.

I didn't have a birth plan, as such. But DH & I had discussed in detail what I did & didn't want, & what my order of preference was. If I ever have another baby, I'll just do that, but write it down. And maybe go for natural delivery of the placenta. Definitely don't bother with a detailed document. Your body & baby won't read it.

DrWhy I am having DC in Scotland so that's great to know! I don't have family here or friends who have had kids here so thank you. Haha cheeky DS!
I'll definitely be going through everything with DP, I think he feels a little left out or like he doesn't have much to do at the moment but his time will come

Don't bother with a birth plan, however do research options for pain relief and ethical/personal choices such as;

Managed final stage or natural
Skin to skin
Assistance with BF
Preferences for pain relief (keep an open mind)

Etc etc x

I chose not to have a birth plan as at the end of the day if they HAVE to do something to save you or your baby they HAVE to do it regardless of your wishes.
I went into my birth wanting a "natural" birth in a pool and no pain relief apart from gas and air.
I realised early on I would be wanting pain relief and due to dehydration, a high white cell count and the fact I kept shivering and getting super cold I wasn't allowed in the birth pool at all, nor was I allowed morphine. My only option was an epi (which was AMAZING). My contractions stopped part way through so I also needed an oxytocin drip.
The only thing I had told my midwife I did NOT want under any circumstances was to be cut. But I knew if they had to cut me it would be to help my baby, so I told my midwife before it got to transition phase that she had prior consent to do whatever she needed to do but if you ask me if you can cut me I will say no, so just do it if you have to. The doctor at the end really wanted to do it but my midwife was awesome and persuaded the doctor to hold off for a few minutes as she knew I wouldn't be happy about it and in that time I gave birth with no tears at all.
Even thought my birth was not what I had ideally wanted going into labour and I had lots of intervention I hadn't wanted going into it, I ended up having a really positive birth experience.
If I was to do it again, I would again just "go with the flow".

Agree with what everyone is saying about birth plans. I had a rough idea of what I wanted to have happen, as it made me feel "more prepared", but what's gonna happen is gonna happen.

You just have to trust the midwives and consultants that are there to get that baby into your arms the safest way possible. I didn't want forceps either, but that is what got him out the quickest and safest when he decided to be a little troublemaker and put himself into an awkward position.

As soon as there was the chance that I was going to need to go into theatre, I had like 8 people in my room all springing into action to help get bubba into the world safely.

Have a rough birth plan, but don't panic or feel concerned if/when things don't go as planned! x