Anxious about birth

[WednesdayAddams2525]

FTM here! I'm sure I'm not the first person to feel like this, but I'm 37 weeks today and a bit anxious about the impending birth!!

Feel like I've heard so many horror stories from others that it feels impossible to just have a normal birth!

I've got a few complications, polyhydramnios which hasn't shown any signs of decreasing, baby is large (or as far as they can tell above the 95%) and have a bladder condition meaning I have to self catheterise (which I can't manage as well with a bump this big) and so am in and out of hospital with an indwelling catheter often.

I'm under consultant led care, she said when I see her in a week or so she will discuss options. Not sure what the options are.

Guess I'm just having a good old worry and after being so nervous through the pregnancy I'm nearly at the end and I'm extra nervous!!

I'm not really sure what I'm asking for, maybe just others to tell me they were nervous too? That it's ok to feel anxious? Just a general hand hold!!!

Of course it’s ok to feel anxious!

Try to remember that horror stories are so much more interesting than “I had contractions, laboured a bit, then pop! held my baby while I delivered the placenta.”

Also remember that the straightforward birth story told right after a horror story can come across as ‘smug’. So women tend to keep quiet.

It could also be seen as judgemental on the woman relaying a traumatic story. As in, “oh I found it easy, maybe you didn’t do it right...?”

Lots of reasons why you hear the worst. The best labours are one day, and quickly forgotten, as the mother begins on her parenting journey.

Add to that, your anxiety may work against you in childbirth. Fight or flight will take over. It’s not too late to grab a Hypnobirthing cd or listen to some Fearfree Childbirth podcasts.

Hope for the best, plan for the worst. Good luck!

Thank you!! I think it just hit me that it's so close!

There was some talk of me being induced so part of me is worried about that, obviously if it's best I will go along with it, but you hear ladies on here with their tales of induction being a nightmare and it worries the heck out of me!!

I was induced with DC1. It was fine! Just had the pessary, then water birth with only gas and air. Like, it was a hard day. But it was fine. 10lb 1oz baby, a few stitches, healed fast. The placenta got stuck briefly, but it turned out to be because my bladder was full, so a catheter would have prevented that! And indeed did solve the problem.

It's normal to be anxious. Of COURSE it is. But the chances are you'll be totally fine.

@HumpHumpWhale thank you!!!!! I'm so glad to hear a story about being induced that didn't end in horrors!

I guess horror stories are more interesting than ordinary ones so maybe that's why there is an abundance.

I made the mistake of reading a post about induction and someone said 4 out of 5 end in emergency c-section and I thought crikey that's so high. It sounded very dangerous but surely the consultant wouldn't have mentioned it if it wasn't safe x

Try to be the gate keeper of your thoughts for the next few weeks. Politely but firmly change the subject if someone is thoughtless enough to share a horror story. It’s not badness, just thoughtlessness and a quick, subject change will save you the worry.

Because you will not have their birth story. Your birth story is yet to be written.

Worried about induction? Google “positive induction birth stories”.

My SIL was induced and bounced on the ball to move it along before delivery my nephew with gas and air. No dramas.

There are some positive ones!! Maybe I was looking in the wrong place, coupled with a bit of over anxiety!!

It seems some websites tell you everything and anything that can go wrong. While it's good to be informed I think it's important to hear positive ones too.

I was induced. It was boring more than anything (was 5 days before I actually went into labour)

I had a c section in the end but to be honest it wasn't at all traumatic for me. It's most likely to be ok

@sourpatchkid thanks for your reply, good to know even if it does end in a c section it can be ok, not all panic stations.

Feel like such a wimp, it's like the anxiety has come from nowhere overnight!

It's probably natural to have a wobble, Labour is all about the unknown so I guess it can be a bit overwhelming.

Seems worse since I started maternity leave...too much sitting around waiting to hatch!

You will be absolutely fine. I love watching that show One Born Every Minute. It always makes me cry and smile. You should give it a watch.
I have 4 children. The first 2 were induced and it was very quick and easy. Yes the contractions are painful but you just breath through it and keep calm. My second two were born normal. Their weights were between 8.1 and 10.1 so very varied. I went without painkillers to challenge myself cause I'm a bit weird like that lol 😁
Be calm and breath when the time comes.
Best of luck with it all. x

@MichelleMcD Wow that does sound like a challenge haha I hope I handle it as well as you!!

I had a wobble at your stage too - perfectly normal!

No point feeling anxious, it's going to happen regardless and is out of your control. You need to accept the uncertainty and trust yourself and your doctors.

My baby was large (10lb) and facing backwards so I had an emergency caesarean. It was the last thing I wanted but it turned out not to be so bad. I was up and about the next day and felt fine within a few weeks. My friend had a natural birth with 4th degree tearing that led to long term issues with incontinence and further surgery to fix it. My point being that you can't say one way of giving birth is always better or worse. Caesarean is not always bad and natural is not always good! It depends how it goes in your individual case.

Oh yes, I know I'm in safe hands, the Hospital and it's staff are great and I know they know their stuff!

Suppose it's just a bit 'oh bloody hell its happening soon' going on!!

I think we tried so long to have her part of me can't actually believe it still!!

@NotTakenUsername did you have success with hypnobirting? Do you have any suggestions? Might be nice to have a go!