Pelvic floor after forceps-advice please

[filou87]

Hi I am looking for advice from other people who have experienced similar births please. sorry it's a long post!

I am 31 and 7.5 weeks postpartum with my first child. It was a 44 hour labour, my waters went naturally I was induced as I did not progress past 2cm dilated. My little girl got distressed, she was back to back with her hand up and I could not deliver her so she was delivered with forceps. I sustained a 2nd degree tear internally and an episiotomy. My stitches ruptured but my episiotomy has since granulated. I had an infection in the internal tear as well as the episiotomy which cleared about two weeks ago. I had some incontinence during my week in hospital- bladder and bowel-and then my bladder was found to be retaining which meant I had a catheter for two weeks.

I have had two episodes of incontinence in the last fortnight, urinary, also if I need to poo I have to get to the toilet urgently.

My husband and I had sex for the first time since birth a few days ago. It was absolutely mortifying for me. Sorry for TMI... I was very tight before giving birth and could clench my husband extremely hard. However now my vaginal walls feel very weak and I am struggling to feel much at all when I when I do my kegels or during sex. There was little sensation for me during sex which was so distressing for me. My husband came but it took him longer, he swears I feel almost the same as before and that it was because I put a lot of lube inside that it took him longer to come.

I have an appointment with a women's health physio next week. I am doing my kegels religiously, even though I can't feel much, this seems to be helping keep control of my bladder but I am so worried about recovery. I know it's early days but we had a fantastic sex life before and I am so scared it's over.

Please can you share your experiences and advice.

I am very sorry you have gone through all this. I hope someone comes on who has experienced something similar and can advise you. I can only say that even without forceps, tears, and stitches, I found the changes difficult enough.
Have you thought of trying Innovo which was put through a trial by MN users very recently and which seems to make a huge difference? (I have not tried this myself as it is a long time later for me.)

Congratulations on the birth of your little girl
Your DH sounds very nice indeed. Good luck.

Can you go get post partum physiotherapy for your pelvic floor? Its standard practice for all mums in some countries no matter what kind of birth they had. pelvichealthsolutions.ca/for-the-patient/what-is-pelvic-floor-physiotherapy/ But the first time after birth isn't exactly fantastic so i wouldn't worry too much.

Hi OP,
Unfortunately the pelvic floor takes quite a while to strengthen again after birth.
There's the birth itself (and a back-to-back baby and forceps is not an easy birth) but also the hormones swirling around your body for a long time. Relaxin starts softening your ligaments in pregnancy and more hormones are released when the placenta is delivered.
If you are breastfeeding, it will take longer for things to tighten up so to speak.
The muscles of the pelvic floor take around 3 months (with diligent daily exercises x3) to strengthen but it can take longer, particularly after forceps. You should feel a marked improvement around 3 months and another around 6.
Once your pelvic floor is in a better shape, you can start working on your core muscles and carry on strengthening everything.
The best is to see a woman's health physiotherapist who can give you recommendations. She'll also be able to check your muscles are relaxed as well.
7.5 weeks feel like an eternity but for the postpartum it is early.
Take care

I had almost exactly this scenario happen to me - rotational forceps delivery of a back to back and distressed baby - though thankfully my episiotomy recovery was straightforward). It took about 6 months for me to strengthen my pelvic floor up (and get my abs back together as they had separated significantly) the women's health physio at my local hospital had a physio led pilates course that I did, it helped. Might be worth seeing if your trust offers something similar?
With regards to sex I found it very painful for a few months due to some internal scarring and so we took our time. By 6 months it was back to normal (and I got pregnant again 🙈)
Take your time, you've had a brutal delivery and will still be recovering even if you feel fine. Hopefully women's physio will help, you can download the Squeezy app (nhs pelvic floor app).