4th degree tear- 12 week Consultation help

[Tattybogle89]

Hi has anyone had a 4th degree tear? Did a search but found nothing recent. I’m struggling and jump when the letterbox goes as I know I’m due an appointment through for my 12 week follow up.. I assume this will involve my bits in the air and a bloke poking around down there again. And I don’t think I will cope.
I already ignored a physio check up after birth then cried because I was stupid enough not to go.

Anyone been through similar?

Thank you
If any one else wants to share, please do

Hi OP. I do feel pretty normal now. It took a while for me to get over what was a very traumatic birth physically and mentally.

I still have less control over wind, but apart from that it's OK. Physio on anal sphincter muscle was v helpful. I also discovered waitress wet toilet wipe type things which were great to feel clean.

Honestly I was totally shocked that you hadn't been automatically referred for follow-up after your tear. That's really poor. I know it's really hard but please do ask for a referral. Tell your Gp about the level of tear and you want a specialist to check how well your sphincter has healed. Like someone said uptrend it's a probe at the entry, it's not great but for me it was nothing compared to my birth experience!

Keep posting x

Waitrose not waitress!

I had a 4th degree tear with my first DC, 28 years ago. No follow up care at all.

It took me about a year to be able to have a 'normal' bowel movement. I read about pelvic floor exercises & have done them regularly for years.

The urge issues can be a problem. I don't wait to go loo. As I'm in the menopause, I expect this to get worse.

I was never offered any help. I know, I really know how difficult it is but please look after yourself & chase up your after care.

Do it for your future self.

HI I’m sorry your birth was traumatic everything went great for me until pushing stage and I had no pain relief so it was excruciating.
Sorry if iv been unclear, I wasn’t automatically referred to physio for tear.
But I was told I will get a 12 week consultant follow up in post. It’s not arrived yet. I’m not sure how I go about requesting physio or if they will do at this appt when it finally arrives.
I hope I get a female doctor. Don’t know how I request that when I have no info though.
The whole thing is so degrading. I know they are doing their jobs but I left the surgery feeling violated for want of a better word .
If I needed any follow up surgery am I put to sleep then? Or spinal block again do you know x

Thank you Nicky. I’m sorry your Care was poor. I always think, if you sustained a similar injury ina car crash or something, how different it would be dealt with.sonetimes it feels as though birth injuries, are almost expected and you just have to get on with it. Only giving me paracetamol for example, felt harsh x

Hi I had a fourth degree tear 5 years ago. The best you can do is go for the pysio, they are so kind and understanding, you have nothing to be ashamed of, also, I was traumatised like you. I eventually went to my gp who said it was ptsd and referred me to counselling. I would speak to your gp / health visitor about the way you are feeling.
Seek help and be kind to yourself. No one is judging you xxx