Have to have an 'elective' c section....

[Mixedupmummy]

Due to having 2 previous emcs. They were for different reasons but essentially I don't have a choice as due to previous ops and scaring it would be dangerous for me to have another emcs.

Its booked for next week! And I'm having a hard time getting my head round it. I really don't want one. Though accept I need it and don't have a choice. I keep thinking how much easier everything would be if I could have a natural delivery. (Although clearly I can't having tried and failed twice already) Although I accept natural births can have complications too, I seem to keep hearing stories about how people sneeze out babies and how great they feel afterwards.

Can anyone offer advice, reassurance, positives of having an elective c section?

Mine was fine. I dont have any truck with the ‘natural is always better’ crap though and I have no truck with the idiots who waffle on about natural birth being healing.
A good birth is whatever gets the baby out with minimal damage to the baby AND the mother. That can be natural, or it can be an emcs or an elcs. The chances of you sneezing out a baby in a first time VBAC are minimal - elcs is probably the best option for you.

Your recovery is likely to be quicker with a planned Elcs. It’s calmer, no exhaustion from labouring beforehand etc. Obviously it’s surgery and there are risks with any surgery but an elcs is pretty safe.

I had one because I had to with my second. I had an odd experience as my dc needed urgent care once born hence the elective. Others will have positive experienced about the birth, holding baby right away etc. But I have to say the recovery was far, far quicker than my emcs.

I requested and fought for an elcs with my twins - I was terrified of vaginal birth and know so many women who’ve had serious problems for years following a vaginal delivery. It’s interesting how i obsessed about those stories and you’re focussed on the stories of the easy vaginal births (which are pretty rare - at least the sort of births you’re talking about!).

I ended up needing an Emcs and my recovery was really not that bad - I honestly think the recovery from a severe tear or episiotomy would be worse in many ways.

A friend of mine had an horrific Emcs with her twins and recently had an elcs and she couldn’t believe how different the experience was - she was really happy. I’m sure your concern is related to how difficult the first two were but this should be quite different.

Hi OP - I gave birth "naturally" and honestly it was horrific. I had awful birth injuries and the first 4 weeks after birth I couldn't stand or walk for longer than a few minutes. If I ever have another baby I hope I can have an ELC as I would hate to go through that again.
It is horrible having the decision taken out of your hands though, I know what you mean. I do hope it all goes well for you. Good luck!

Thanks all! You've not said anything I don't already know but sometimes it helps to hear it from other people.
Think I'm just feeling emotional as the time comes closer. Also feeling very "niggly" and its getting worse as the week goes on which is making me more tired and emotional. The joys!

OP if you re-read your post, you've actually said your own answer in it. You "want" one kind of birth, yet you "need" another to ensure both you and your baby are safe.

Does it help at all to note the "perfect" vaginal births you dream of are unusual anyway, and in your case with two previous trials of labour ending in two emergency sections, is likely to be rarer still? Apologies if that actually makes it worse!

Elective sections are reputed to be easier to recover from than EMCS - obviously some emergencies are way more "smash-and-grab" than others but all ELCS are done with a completely staffed team, fully rested, during normal working hours, adequate time allotted for it, etc so the process can be more careful and your body doesn't have the stress of a period of labour.

I know it seems like an entire chorus of "natural" goddesses out there but the birth is just a process, whether you give birth by section or not is a detail. In your case, section gives you and your baby the best guarantee of a safe healthy delivery - what could be more amazing than that?

Best wishes.

I've done it both ways and I can tell you that the EMCS was by far the easiest and quickest to recover from. Of course that isn't the case for everyone and of course we all have ideas about how we want the birth to be and it's natural to feel disappointed when that doesn't happen, but the main thing isn't how they come out, but that they do come out safe and happy.

OP I had to have an emcs 4 weeks ago because the scar tissue was starting to come apart from my previous c section 4 years earlier. It was pretty frightening.

I have 3 children. 1 foreceps, 1 elcs (breech) and 1 emcs. First experience was by far the worst. I am good at making babies, shit at getting them out!

I will never experience a "normal" birth and it does make me feel like a bit of a failure but then I look at my kids and realise that actually, once they are here and we are all safe it doesn't matter.

Focus on the positives: you won't have the same level of exhaustion, there is a predictability so you can plan for your other children better and recovery from an elcs is very different to an emcs at the end of labour and possibly other interventions.

Eyes on the prize...

My friends who have had ‘easy’ births are still scared to go through it again.

I have only had one birth (EMCS) and I understand the need to do it ‘properly’. There are hypnobirthing CD aimed specifically at women who are having c sections - perhaps that might help. I was planning a vaginal birth and the skills I learnt hypnobirthing helped me through the scary parts of my EMCS.

I had an (unwilling) elective. It was okay. Just take snacks and something to do with you because you might get bumped to the back end of the day and hang around for hours.