Second birth stories

[ellemo]

Am obsessing now about delivery of my next babe - due 14/05, so am digging for info' about natural delivery after previous VB (where tearing & stiching was involved). Is it likely that I will tear again?? any thing I can do to prevent tearing?? Am I being ridiculous that tearing is a becoming a big issue? Quick history is DS #1 was emCS (9lb 4oz) but disregard for sake of discussion. DS #2 was VBAC (9lb 3oz) - had gas & air & diamorphine injection during labour. Am interested in hearing 2nd VB stories so as to try & establish which delivery mode to choose - VB or CS? Since my previous post I am now thinking about this bloody delivery 24/7 - have opened a real can of worms. Wish I had thought about all this 6mths ago!!!

I found my 2nd much easier. I laboured in the birthing pool, got out when I wanted gas and air; all over in 6 hours.

I tore a bit with both but tbh I thought that sort of went with the job iykwim - lavender oil is a godsend if you do tear I found.

Deffo recommend the birthing pool!!

2nd birth much easier. Tore a little each time - 2 stitches first time and only 1 second time - dd2 was 1lb 4oz heavier than dd1. dd2's birth stories on the birth announcements - 'Leah's mum receives a quick delivery' I think thats what its called.

Good luck! Try not to worry - theres no point its got to come out some how.

How bad was your tear ... did you have a tough time healing?

I was really hoping not to tear with my second birth - had a tough time pushing ds (my first) out, and knew I hadn't handled it well - hadn't found it easy to do things slowly etc. With dd (very, very easy birth - forgot to ask for pain relief ) I though I must have cracked it - birthed her head SO slowly and carefully and was totally in control of it. Still tore. (2nd degree both times, but consultant said nearly 3rd degree second time - humm, thanks for telling me!). I asked the midwife - did I not do it 'properly'? She said, tbh, some women just tear - she said I could tell the minute you started pushing . Although, dd also had her hand up, so assume that made things worse.

FWIW, I had a brilliant second birth overall - could actually say I enjoyed it - got into this 'zone' that people talk about, but I never really experieinced with my first - felt completely focused and like I really knew what I was doing. The tearing was not a big deal for me.

As others have said, in practical terms, perineal massage is meant to really help

Good luck!

Oh good grief. My tearing wasn't measured in degees & so I guess it wasn't so bad. I just felt like it took weeks & weeks & more to heal. It was just a horrible recovery, I felt so sore & damaged. I'm soon realising that you never can tell & another VB could be just as bad or better or god forbid worse!!

ellemo - tearing tends to be less or not at all with second births because the muscles and skin have been stretched with first birth. I personally had 2 episiotomies (1st and 2nd births). Second time was better than first probably because I had experience from first time IYSWIM? Didn't have any stitches with next 2 babies.

As a midwife I find that women need less stitches for second and subsequent births.HTH.

It does help - am finding near impossible to get any info' from my 'team' regarding all issues I have. So its nice to have an experts outlook. All pretty grim isn't it really - neither birth option appeals to me really, but guess I've little choice in the matter now. He has to come out one way or another.

to help prevent tearing...

perineal massage

water birth - so the perineum is supported

squatting and all fours positions can help too

second time you will hopefully feel more in control, and more able to work with your body...there is no reason you will tear again, and if oyu do, that it will be bad....

i had first baby be emergecny c.s and second was a VBAC, with intact perineum, a small labial graze that needed a stitch or two.....no big deal !!

wondering if the diarmorphine made you a bit sleepy or out of it last time, might be better to try without it this time, use gas and air and water, so when you are pushing you are 'there' and able to push / pant / blow as needed!

also, you can prepare for afterwards...

arnica is great for bruising, and good for after a c.s or vaginal birth...salt baths good for healing, tea tree oil , i found that a pair of big granny pants and a thick maternity pad seemed to help support the whole fanjo area after birth which made me more comfortable

also, warm water poured over your bits when you wee or weeing just before you get out of the bath can help....