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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

I'm beginning to think something is wrong

51 replies

hairylegsdontcare · 11/09/2017 09:44

40+6 today. Endless, endless false labour and BH contractions for the last 3 weeks, but no 'show' or waters breaking. Is this baby EVER going to be born??

I'm worrying because every woman in my maternal family has given birth on time, and I am the only one who has gone so late.

My husband was 2 weeks late because he had a life-threatening illness at birth. There is also a 12 lb baby in my family ShockShock (dad's side) who was born late and had breathing problems for his whole life, and I really don't want that!

Can anyone reassure me that all will be well? Everything I have read suggests that most babies have been born by this point - what's wrong with me?

OP posts:
Believeitornot · 12/09/2017 16:54

How certain are you of dates? It's not a precise measure anyway.

I went 40+8 with my first!

If you're worried then ask for a MW to see you sooner if possible.

MollyHuaCha · 12/09/2017 17:02

Good luck hairylegs. You'll soon be there. Smile

Original poster
hairylegsdontcare · 12/09/2017 22:58

I'm certain the dates are correct- we were TTC for quite a while and I'm confident of when conception was.

I'm really struggling tonight. I was feeling so positive about labour, birth and becoming a parent, and confident that my body was in control and knows what it is doing. To achieve this is such a big thing for me: I have had body hate issues forever and have worked hard to overcome them. All of that confidence is ebbing away as day after day passes with fuck all different from yesterday. Having a natural(ish) birth is really important to me, and I feel like the chances of that are dwindling.

It's good to hear that most of you had totally normal births after waiting for so long. For some reason, even despite them, I'm finding it so hard to keep the faith that I will be one of you.

Seeing the midwife tomorrow.

OP posts:
Littlecaf · 13/09/2017 16:04

hairylegsdontcare

Still here. Adrenaline rushes, twinges, heartburn, heavy pressure down there. Still nothing.

Best of luck! But don't worry. They all have to arrive at some point. But do do do keep your options open and go with the flow of what happens. Enjoy your last few days of freedom! It's also not an exact science predicting a Birthday, I'm due on Sat but told everyone 'any time in September' is more realistic.

FutureDays · 13/09/2017 16:09

My daughter was born 12 days late, they tried to do a sweep a few days earlier and body wasn't ready, I had a show and waters break whilst I was having contractions the day she was born (the day before I was due to be induced)

Original poster
hairylegsdontcare · 14/09/2017 09:37

Good luck littlecaf, I hope you don't have too much longer to wait :)

I had a sweep yesterday, and midwife said I was fully effaced and 2-3 cm dilated. She was pretty confident the sweep would work, but here I am, 24 hours later and still no progress. Just worse pgp to the point where I can barely walk.

I'm resigned to the induction now. It was so important to me to give birth on the midwife-led birth centre, not on the hospital ward, because I hate hospitals. If I go more than 42 weeks, or am induced, that will not be possible.

Could seriously not be feeling any more miserable, or so let down by my body.

OP posts:
Smoochyschmoo · 14/09/2017 09:44

Try not to worry about babys size, my first was 9lb3oz & last was 10lb9oz and I don't think those labours were any worse than a 7lb baby! I'm only 5ft4" and was a size 8.

I'm sure if you were expecting a bigger baby than that then the midwives would have mentioned it.

My last one was an induction due to my health and it only lasted 8 hours from the pessary going in. Hopefully all these false contractions will have prepped your uterus for the real thing.

Best of luck!

Original poster
hairylegsdontcare · 14/09/2017 10:22

Thanks smoochy, that is very reassuring to hear! I am about the same height/weight as you so hopefully I will be fine. The midwife hasn't mentioned anything about his size so I hope there's nothing untoward there. However I am now 9 days over so I guess he/she's bound to be bigger than usual!

OP posts:
Smoochyschmoo · 14/09/2017 11:17

I went 9 days over with my 2nd and it's awful, I was induced on my due date last time and even that was bad enough. Even though you know you've only got a few days left max, it doesn't help when you're uncomfortable and in pain.

I'm currently fighting to get my 7 week old to sleep, pregnancy a distant memory!

wowl · 14/09/2017 11:37

Is there a long transfer to the hospital from the MLU? If not, I'd stick with the MLU - you don't have to accept induction regardless of how it may seem. It's your birth, your choice. If the only reason they're suggesting induction is dates, but baby's movement and everything else is as it should be, don't feel you have to accept an induction that you don't want :)

ineedmorethanthis · 14/09/2017 13:46

You know that miserable, cross feeling? My MW said it was good. It was hormone changes and a sign of approaching labour.

Not sure that would have worked in court if I had acted out my rage feelings!

It is quite common to feel grumpy and worried. I got irrational and decided I wanted to change my mind about having a baby. Then i drove round a car park in tears of anger when I couldn't find a parking space.

In the middle of labour I announced i had changed my mind and didn't want to do it anymore. Then i bit my husband's hand really hard during a contraction. The way he was holding my hand was annoying me. It seemed logical behaviour at the time.

I could go on....Lots of us feel like crap before giving birth. I had the big whoosh of serotonin after my second, less stressful labour, and it cancelled all those miseries out and gave me a big surge of energy to get through the next few days.

Get yourself something nice to eat, watch your favourite shit tv and try to calm. It'll all be fine. BrewFlowers

You'll have your baby in your arms soon. Be kind to yourself.

ineedmorethanthis · 14/09/2017 13:48

Oh yes, my biggest baby was by far the most easy labour. My advice is to stay as upright as possible through the whole thing.

ineedmorethanthis · 14/09/2017 13:54

And you need to cut your body some slack. It isn't letting you down. It will go into labour when it is ready and even if you are induced and end up with a crash section it still hasn't let you down. You aren't doing anything wrong or failing at birth in any way. Some babies are early, some late. Some are easy births, some hard.

By looking after yourself kindly you are doing the best you can. Try to mobilise gently and keep moving as much as a possible during labour is my best advice. And be much, much kinder on yourself and your body. You are doing well. You are growing your baby and about to be a mum. Would you tell your daughter her body was letting her down just because she went to 40+?

TrunkiTrailer · 14/09/2017 13:55

2-3cm and fully effaced is amazing, especially if this is your first, many first time mums have to labour for hours to get that far. If you did have it have in induction this will mean your bishops score will be high, the higher the bishops score the better the chance of a quick induction.

My first baby was induced. I was gutted as I wanted a natural birth. But like you I was in the unusual position of already being 2-3cm so they put in a pessary, I hung around for 12 hours playing cards with DH and feeling discomfort but nothing at all bad. Then they broke my waters, contractions started and 70 minutes later I was holding my baby.

TrunkiTrailer · 14/09/2017 13:56

Oh and the baby was 10lbs 2oz!

burntoutmum · 14/09/2017 13:59

Hope baby makes an appearance soon!

not placemarking for a cute baby pic, oh no!

2ducks2ducklings · 14/09/2017 14:04

Being overdue is just the worst! You really have my sympathy. My son was 12 days late and was born the day I was due to be induced. Obviously, if you're concerned contact your midwife, but I do think that full term is classed as anything between 38 and 42 ish weeks.

bakingcupcakes · 14/09/2017 14:16

My son was born at 40+15 and 7lb2 so not huge at all. By my dates he was 40+10 (dating scan altered the date) but he was definately over. Not all late babies are big! I refused induction. It won't be long now.

Original poster
hairylegsdontcare · 14/09/2017 21:02

Thank you so much for all your replies, and for the encouragement and positive stories. I feel better at the moment- things always feel worse in the mornings for me. I have had some show tonight and some backache so hopefully things are starting. Fingers crossed :) xx

OP posts:
holdthewine · 16/09/2017 21:28

Hoping your silence means things are happening for you OP!

SnowiestMountain · 16/09/2017 21:31

Hope you're doing ok OP!

DorisPegg · 16/09/2017 21:34

How's it going OP?

everythingsucks · 16/09/2017 22:13

How are you doing HairyLegs?

Littlecaf · 17/09/2017 22:01

hairylegsdontcare

I hope you're ok and it's moved along!

(Me, baby boy born yesterday. Currently on sofa with said baby latched to boob!)

Salva91 · 19/09/2017 11:56

All is well. You don't need to worry. It is normal. Sometimes it goes to exact 42 weeks and baby is normal and healthy. You just need take care of your family background. Sometimes it effects. As your husband's and another case in the family is same. It may effect your child too. Baby birth at 41 or 42 week is a normal thing as long as your family history don't have any critical case. You asked to your gynaecologist about it. You also need to discuss about your family background. It will help to save your child from any complication. My prayers are with you. Best of luck.

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