C section views

[MunchkinJess]

Why do people have such incredibly strong views about c sections ? Like why does it genuinely seem to cause such strong emotion whether it be good or bad ?

I am having my second planned section for various reasons and every time I mention i'm having a planned section the reaction is always a negative one . I feel I have to explain myself ( I no longer do )

I just don't understand why people feel so strongly either way .

Child birth is so personal to each individual and there is no wrong or right way to have your baby so it always boggles me why people feel so strongly about it .

I guess it's the same as everything . But it just seems in general people always have a negative opinion if you don't choose to have your baby the natural way .

Whenever I tell someone I'm having a c section their first reaction is " oh no how come ? Is everything ok ?"

Always assuming the worst . What if I'm choosing to have a csection because that's just the way that I want to have my baby ?!

The midwives I've been dealing with have been particularly bad and they weren't great 4 years ago after I had my daughter also all because I had a planned c section . Not bothering to ask me why not that I should have to explain myself to justify it anyways .

After I had my daughter when the health visitor came round four days later she actually said to me in anger " well cuz you have had a c section you will never loose the baby weight and you haven't exactly done the best for your baby have you " I was so shocked that I had nothing in me to say anything back ...this time I won't be putting up with any of that nonsense!

munchkin it's a shame that "losing the baby weight" is also top of the priority list for some people. I'm lucky in that so far I've only put on 2 stone. And the midwife did say earlier in the week that it should just fall off fairly quickly - did I need to be told that though? No. People have asked what fitness regime I'm going to do to get my figure back. I've had comments like "ooh bet you can't wait to get back into your pre pregnancy clothes?!" Well yes. This is true. I am over stretchy maternity clothes. The novelty has worn off. But it'll happen when it happens. I'm not forcing it.

It seems like it's another badge of honour - "oooh I was back to a size 10 within 5 minutes of giving birth (no pain relief)" I've seen similar posts on my fb feed recently.

Apparently all us women's should care about is looking pretty for the men's.

How you deliver has nothing to do with how quickly/if you lose any weight - quite factually wrong.

There is a very widespread that 'natural' = 'better', in all sorts of respects.
You know, 'natural' herbal medicine better than the nasty chemicals - except it's not as effective herbal medicines contain chemicals that make them work.
Cyanide is perfectly 'natural'....

'Natural' labour and deliveries have killed untold number of women since the beginning of time, so I am all for something a wee bit 'unnatural'. I have seen women in Africa in obstructed labour for 3 days with a dead baby inside them and the damage of permanent double incontinence they are left with

And seeing that 'Caesarean Section' is so called because Julius Caesar (allegedly) was delivery via the sunroof, well, it's been around for a while.
We should be glad and celebrating that there are options.

I do think that anybody who is considering a CS by choice (no medical need) must be fully aware of the potential down-sides and must be made to think about the possible worst outcomes. That is not about putting anybody off, but it IS surgery and the usual bleeding/infection/death as with ANY other surgery are a possibility.
But of course VB can go wrong also...

I think women considering any mode of birth should be given the potential downsides, whether ELCS or attempting VB. That's the only way to make an informed choice. Both methods reduce or eliminate the risk of some problems whilst introducing or increasing others. Unfortunately the NHS tends to be rather better at telling us the downsides of CS than of attempting VB.

I've had an emergency section after a long, failed induction, and I'm booked in for a planned section this time around. I get annoyed on two fronts.

Firstly it's the 'don't you at least want to try?' comments. Common and usually well meaning, but no, I don't. Why should I? My medical history shows it's the best option for me and my consultant and midwife agree. Why would I want to try something potentially more dangerous? I don't judge my worth as a woman by how I give birth, anymore than I judge my worth as a person by whether I require glasses. Such is life.

Secondly it's the less common but more inflammatory 'easy way out' comments, although most don't have the balls to phrase it that way, that's what they're getting at. Just NOPE. The one thing that has me worried and wishing it were different is the thought of recovery. Having had a previous section, I have a good idea what I'm in for. This kind of comment invariably comes from people who have never experienced major abdominal surgery. I'm trying not to let ignorant people upset me. These people are also prone to assuming I can't bond with my c-section baby.

People like to judge everything about pregnancy, childbirth, feeding, raising children. This is just the beginning!

I'm having a planned CS in two weeks for my second child. It's classed as elective and I honestly do not care what people not involved in my antenatal care think of that.

I had a horrendous time giving birth to DS and my recovery took much much longer than a CS recovery would have. I also developed PND that was largely linked to the birth. I've discussed birthing choices with my consultant, midwives and the perinatal mental health team and have made the decision that is right for me. I'm not going to let anyone make me feel bad about that.

I've had 3 vaginal births and 2 sections (one elective and one emergency). Personally I found both sections incredibly traumatic and so much worse than my vaginal births. It's such a personal choice though. I think part of the problem is after you give birth once then a lot of people think they are experts. Also birth is a big thing and we like to talk about it. I remember being alone with dh's boss once and we ended up comparing notes on our births. Dh was a bit horrified when he got back!

it's the 'don't you at least want to try?' comments.

Oh I get this too Edgar. I was all up for a VBAC this time and heavily researched my options, but after 100 hours and three pessaries opening my cervix up to a record 0cm meaning DD was born at 42+0 in a fucking OMG WE NEED TO GET HER OUT NOW caesarian I've opted for an ELCS this time round.

I'd also like to tell the midwife who - on learning my choice let out a big "oh nooooo, whyyyyy?" - that after my previous pregnancy ended in mc I'd like to do all I can to make sure I don't fall at the final hurdle and risk any unknowns causing me or my baby an increased risk of injury or death.

Dramatic? Maybe.
But factual? Yes.

/end of rant

i'm a strong advocate for elective c-section.

It might be a 'natural process', but it's an incredibly painful and dangerous one. And whilst I don't often like to spin a feminist light on things, if men had to give birth there'd be no question about offering electives.

I am so lucky that my husband is incredibly supportive and is very much your growing our baby and I support whatever choice you make as long as you are safe.

I am due my second elective in four days time and I am so scared but I think it's more down to the care I have received up to this point.

I hate the judgment I get from midwives and HV and this time I won't be biting my tongue if any of them say anything remotely out of line! Last time I was left an emotional mess on the floor and had PND because of their comments and constant nit picking ....this time I am much stronger mentally and emotionally and won't stand for it.

I think there are so many misconceptions about ELCS.

• Recovery isn't instant, but neither is it for most vaginal births. I think many people who haven't had one assume the recovery will be longer and harder, but in reality it often isn't. Yes, its quicker to recover from a perfect vaginal birth, but the vast majority of them aren't that easy. But I can see how someone who hadn't had a ELCS, or had an emergency one (so are often recovering from both) might think that.

• I think there is some jealousy. I'm a massive fan of sections because IMO they are as near as you can get to a pain free birth. I do think I took the easy way out, but far from making me feel bad, I am happy about that. Why suffer pain unnecessarily?

blueskyrain maybe that's my problem then. My vaginal births were all under 5 hours in length and with no tears. So compared with that my c-sections were awful. I found the pain after my sections was worse than during my vaginal births.

I feel strongly about CSections because the focus in the UK tends to be all about the method of delivery rather than the concept of woman centred care.

Woman centred care does not carry judgments on how you give birth. It doesn't consider budgets and targets. It is just about the right thing for each individual.

This is the problem.

This is what should be promoted above all else.

For this reason I have an issue with anyone who thinks other people have to justify how they give birth. Its not their business. I feel equally strongly about home births as I do about CS on this front.

What is right for me, isn't necessarily right for you or the next person.

What there should be, is more honesty and openness about the risks and the need to be supported in which ever path way is felt is most appropriate for you.

This discussion should be between a woman and her midwife/doctor based on clinical evidence.

Instead its a conversation that is all too often one that is highly politicised, involves accountants and is littered with ignorance and common misinformation and ideology (which includes from HCPs) and involves far more people than it should do.

RTB, I agree with you re woman (or in other contexts patient-) centred care.
However IME and IMO that lovely phrase is simply trotted out to pay lip service
Ture woman centred care requires high levels of training, one-on-one time with ideally the same HCP, investment in training, hospital/MLU infrastructure and a change in philosophy.
One size fits all care is far more 'efficient' (oh, how I hate that word in the context of health care!), time- and resource saving.

So, unless somebody is lucky (I was) or able to be particularly articulate and assertive about their needs and wishes, a system that delivers woman entered care is a ways off

But in principle, I totally agree with you.

elliejjtiny, possibly, though I think section recovery can vary hugely too. Tbh, when sat/lying down, I had a vague ache occasionally, but far milder than period pain. Moving did hurt but wasn't agonising and quickly improved. I did make sure I was fully dosed up for about a week though, so never unmediated, and I rested a lot.

I had a few early contractions before my section, and those were more painful than my recovery (save for getting up the first couple of times, which did hurt).

But everyone is different. I almost went shopping on the way home from the hospital (husband disuaded me), but a good friend of mine couldn't really go out for a week or two.

I'd never contemplate a vaginal birth in a million years personally.