I really want an elective c section - please can people offer me some advice on what to say/re evidence I need to provide?

[Daschund1984]

Im sorry to bother everyone but I am desperate for an elective c section - I know you can request them on the NHS according to NICE guidelines but am just really worried my request will be refused.

I am building up a case to get a c section myself hopefully. I am only 17 weeks pregnant at the min and I have an appointment in the middle of July which isn't very long. And people who have had an appointment with this consultant I am seeing have said she refuses everyones case for a c section if they want an elective one. My friend is even going through a medical negligence case where she is involved because she was not made aware of a c section.

I am suffering from tokophobia which is a fear of giving birth because was unfortunately raped a couple of years ago, I fell pregnant as a result of it and had an abortion which has left me scarred and this pregnancy was not planned and it has taken a lot of persuasion from my partner to keep it, counselling etc.

Also my mother had a really traumatic birth with me and my sister, my sister has cerebral palsy due to the complications in the birth and unfortunately my mother lost her third child due to birth complications which has terrified me. I have panic attacks and nightmares since I found out I was pregnant of the baby dying.

I have downloaded the NICE guidelines which state that every woman is entitled to ask and if an obstetrician does not agree then they should refer you to someone who will carry it out - but I know all hospitals don't have to follow the NICE guidelines. I also have a lot of research re tokophobia and requesting a c section.

I also know the pros and cons of a c section also (have done a lot of research).

I have spoken to an experienced midwife friend who said I am well within my rights to ask for a c section. I am under abertawe bro morgannwg health board and I noticed you went to newport.

I paid privately to see a perinatal mental health specialist (qualified psychologist) (in london) who has given me a letter recommending me for a c section due to my fear of giving birth. I have also seen about a dozen counsellors on the issue also and unfortunately they have all agreed - very ashamed of my condition.

I am well aware of the pros and cons of giving birth and have done a massive amount of research.

I was wondering if anyone has requested a c section before on psychological grounds and if so does anyone have any tips.

I apologise for the random message but I am so worried about being denied for a c section and I honestly believe I will be.

I would very much appreciate it if you could advise their experience if possible.

Thank you so much in advance.

I'm so sorry you have suffered like this. I can't give much advised I'm afraid. I knew I wanted a c-section but was pregnant just as the NICE guidelines changed, literally 30 wks when it changed! Up to that point, I had not much of a case, my hip was dislocated for most of my pregnancy and I just knew my hip was in a bad way, it had no evidence x ray etc. DS was breach when I went in to labour and that was enough for me to insist. But they did continually try to get me to change my mind, right up until I was rolled in to theatre. I was later diagnosed with a lifelong condition that has left me disabled. Giving birth naturally would have damaged me to the extent of being permanently in a wheelchair. Trust your instinct to know what is right for you.

It sounds like you have everything you need to insist on one. But be prepared to have to say at every appointment that c section is your choice and be strong.

OMG I think you have probably the strongest reasons ever for wanting an ELCS. I can see no reason why they would refuse you, especially since you've already been recommended one by 2 HCPs? Why do you believe you will be? Women are granted ELCSs for much less :)

I just said at my booking appointment that I wanted one (reasons due to previous birth) and MW agreed and I have my consultant appt this week (22 weeks pg).

Really hope you get what you want and good luck!

Thank you so much for your thoughts everyone, I'm so underconfident im just really worried that I may not have one possibly just due to what other people have said about this consultant. But I really appreciate everything everyone has said thank you :).

Agree you've definitely got a case for it and should do what's right for you.
I was the other way round. I was terrified of having a c-section! Luckily I didn't have one in the end. I'm sorry for what you've been through.

I had an elcs on maternal request. There are many others on this board who have had as well. Mental health reasons are just as valid as physical health reasons for a cs and you definitely should get one agreed based on your circumstances. The letter from the psychologist I'm sure will be helpful too. Explain the impact this stress/anxiety is having on your life and the extent to which you have researched- you are aware of risks etc. In the unlikely event they say no ask to be referred to a different consultant. My cs was a great experience and I'm so happy with my decision. Good luck.

Thank you everyone for taking the time to comment on my post and offer me advice - I so appreciate the time you have taken - thank you. Thank you for not being judgemental to :) xx

You sound like you have all the evidence you need already - hopefully your consultant will listen. As PP say, you can always request a different consultant.

There is also a maternity project in London, which accepts patients from across the country, who specialise in supporting women who have been victims of sexual abuse: www.mybodybackproject.com/our-maternity-clinics/
It may be worth contacting them for advice/support to help get everything in order before your appointment?

Good luck

Thank you duggeehugs I really appreciate that, I'll give them a bell :).

I've recently been granted an ELCS, and I had the same worries as you. My consultant was lovely, but he did try to talk me out of it for the first 20 mins of our appointment. Once he saw that I was serious and that I understood the risks he was happy to book me in for a CS. So just be prepared to have to be stubborn and don't allow them to talk you into anything other than what you want. It sounds like you have every reason to request one, and even if this consultant refuses you should ask to be referred to another. My midwife actually referred me to the consultant that was most sympathetic to tokophobia, so if you get refused maybe ask your Midwife's advice.

Good luck, I hope you get the result you want xx

You don't need more 'evidence' than what is in your OP

Should you find yourself refused an elCS then ask for a 2nd opinion.

I was all ready to fight my corner for the delivery i wanted (VBAC in my case) and found that my consultant was very happy to go with whatever option I was more comfortable with (as long as she was happy that I knew what I was asking for), so consultants who listen to the women in their care DO exist.

V best of luck.

Just to reassure you further, my friend had no medical or ps go logical reason for wanting an elective C section. She just asked for it. (her personal reasons for wanting a c section was to have the certainty of giving birth on a certain day and keeping her bits intact!!)
If she was granted one, I'm sure you will be! (Though she a doctor herself so was very confident with her request)

Good luck! i would be amazed if you weren't allowed one.

*pschological

Ah bloody autocorrect...psychological!

You can request to see a different consultant to the one you are booked under. Start with that and if you still come up against problems then request a meeting with a supervisor of midwives ASAP.

Please don't see the potential downsides and risks of an operative delivery being an attempt at 'talking you out of it' - it is every doctor's duty to see informed consent: you do need to know what you are asking.

You will be fine.
Congratulations on your pregnancy - I hope it all goes very well

Thanks so much I really appreciate everyone's advice :). I'll let everyone know how it goes. Thank you once again.

I had c-section for very similar reasons to you, didn't have to fight it, the consultant was very sympathetic and agreed straight away after hearing my reasons.

I've had one due to phobia of childbirth myself. It was a great experience and reasonably easy to recover from with much less pain than I anticipated. I don't imagine there will be any problems with you getting one, and if there is ask to be referred elsewhere.

I am consultant lead because of my bmi. I swear I have read every statistic and pro and con list on the internet, including starting a few threads on here requesting information. I spoke to my midwife about an ELCS, my reasons were because I am petrified of childbirth and all the statistics regarding high bmi made vaginal birth sound like an unsafe option, my midwife wasn't as convinced. She said she wouldn't advise a c section but ultimately it's my consultants decision. I could barely sleep the night before the consultant appointment, I had pages and pages of research about why I believe a c section was the best choice for me. I cried when talking to my husband about possibly being refused when I knew it was 100% what i wanted. While in the waiting room my stomach was in knots and I felt super sick. I honestly thought there was no chance anyone would listen to me or take me seriously, let alone actually give me what i want.
I was in the room with the consultant for 10 minutes, he's discussed the risks with me (which I already knew), asked me if I wanted a second opinion regarding anything (I said no), he gave me a consent form, I signed it, and then he told me my date!!!!
Honestly, I was so relieved and such a massive weight had lifted from my shoulders instantly. He knew I was serious and he gave me what I wanted. I was worried I hadn't given myself enough time. So at 34 and a half weeks pregnant I was booked in for my c section after a 10 minute conversation. Baby is coming out on August the 1st!!!
It can and does happen, be confident in your decision and know your facts and make them listen to you xx

I have my consultant appt this afternoon, I have no research with me etc.... eek! Well actually I'm just assuming it's about my c section - letter just said a consultant appt to discuss my obstetric history. A lot of women on my birth group have their c section date already (November) so I'm hoping I'll get mine! Hoping me just explaining about my previous recovery is 'enough'!

Tbf, I had pages and pages of research, all hand written nicely. He didn't see any of it or ask me about any of it. It's not a test, I think it is definitely more about how you feel than what you know. But knowing the risks before hand does help. Every risk he'd mentioned to me I already knew so it was so frightening when he was telling me about it. Confidence is key and I think if they tell you a risk you didn't know about and you come across as nervous they're less likely to say yes. But I'm only interpreting my experience.

You sound like you have done your research OP, you'll be fine! I wanted a section for the same reasons as you and had no issue, didn't need any evidence with me. So glad I had it. Well had two now! Great experiences.

Bit late with my reply to this, I requested an ELCS due to anxiety after recurrent miscarriage. My consultant told me to go away and research and understand not only the risks, but also the impact of those risks - he actually said "I don't want you reciting back to me parrot fashion the risks, I want you demonstrate that you truly understand the impact, and that a CS is major surgery"

Had another appointment and he signed it off there and then. As it happened I never had my c section as I went in to premature labour 6 weeks early!!! It was actually offered to me as I was in labour and it was booked but I bit the bullet and as I was already dilated decided to see how I would get on with a CS as a back up. I never needed it in the end, but the fact the consultant took my fears and anxiety seriously actually made me feel much better