What relaxed you the most?

[lananzack]

Just that really, what relaxed you the most?
I have crippling anxiety and I entirely panicked through my last labour from start to finish. I can manage the pain, I just can't manage the chronic realisation of being out of control of what's occurring.
D-day () is gonna happen any moment now, and I can already feel my panic box building its walls around me. Any techniques that will bring me back to earth on the day?

Notlost yeah, I recall the tens machine being very handy in the early stages! Will definitely be using that again. The more I read about epidurals the more I genuinely do want one, I just have no idea how I will react when my usual release of "running around full pelt like a nutcase" when I panic is stumped.
Oh it's bloody difficult making a decision when every woman reacts differently to different methods/drugs.
Just done a bit more research on coping methods in labour and gone on to watch minimal drug 'relaxed' birthing videos, where the women have remained entirely calm and collected throughout... Nah. Ill never be that tough. I was likened to the exorcist last time

Stay mobile for as long as you can. Walk or bounce through contractions.

I took a lot of baths during my contractions!

Loved the gas and air.

I also found with dc2 that being on my hands and knees helped - with dc 1 and 3, I was put into a lying down position on the bed, which I resisted, but ended up without a choice.

I honestly believe that relaxing your body during contractions helps loads, although you need to do it consciously, as I tensed up naturally and that hurt much more! I didn't tear with dc3 who was the only child I forced myself to relax for when he arrived!

I didn't have pain relief other than gas and air but both dsis swear by their epidurals.

Our NCT teacher suggested finding a rectangle you can see (TV, window, picture frame etc) and during contractions following the shorter side on the in breath and then the longer side on the out breath. I found it really calming, and used my finger to trace the lines while it was happening. In retrospect I think I must have looked like a slightly deranged ET but it worked and helped me stay focused and stopped me panicking.

hypnobirthing breathing techniques, I just used the maggie howell cd and book, I felt in control, and able to manage the labour

I was able to move around with my recent epidural, game changer from the previous one as it really helped in the pushing stage.

tbh, total naivety helped a lot. I had no idea of the potential downsides and in the end I had an induction, went straight into transition and it was all over in under two hours. The gas and air worked a treat and I had almost no pain.

I think it helps to read a few books about natural childbirth so you understand the stages. But I also took all the drugs, and that helped a lot too. Good luck.

Sorry to thread hijack! Love reading these suggestions, I completely lost my head with DD1 so am trying to plan ahead to DD2 in June... What relaxes me the most in normal life is re-listening to audiobooks on my phone, really helps me zone out and get in a good mental frame... anyone found this to help in labour? Obvs early labour, don't think I'll be wanting Stephen Fry whilst in the pushing stage!

Imo the most important thing is a midwife you can connect with. .
Write a birth plan but be prepared to accept advice form the mw if things don't go quite to plan. Having a trust with her is important. I had one I didn't like once and told dh not to let her back in!! A different one appeared soon after!!

Getting my epidural. Not being flippant or joking. It was horrific up till they point, there were complications that weren't realised for a while so it was pretty tough.

Counting. When a contraction started I would slowly start to count. I knew that when I got to a certain number I was halfway through and it would soon pass. That and my tens machine, both were distractions. Baby 2 was at home, and by the time the midwife arrived there wasn't time to get the gas and air set up he was ready to say hello.

I'm going to use every single one of these techniques - possibly even counting the epidural if all else fails.
Last week I experienced 'false labour' , as soon as I started to get pains, I began to panic, and remembered my breathing and calmed - it bloody stopped anyway after an hour! Wasn't best pleased, but remained calm (ish) atleast.
My water broke early hours this morning though so I'm off to the birth suite to be induced again shortly. Hopefully I'll keep my shit together and will update with what techniques worked for me!

Good luck!