Baby Number Two...

[ChaCha]

...is due to make its appearance later this week, my elective section is booked and it will be all systems go before the weekend!

Having finally decided to opt for the elective I've been pretty calm and enjoying organising everything and just preparing for hospital stay/homecoming etc.. however, perhaps as a consequence of having very little sleep over the past few days am starting to feel very mixed emotions about DC2's arrival. I'm sure it's perfectly normal but I don't think i realise fully what is ahead of me.

Just wanted some reassurance i guess from others who have been there, i'm just tired i think and being a bit emotional, weeks and weeks and weeks of talking about the 'big day' and all of a sudden it's almost upon us. Last year's emergency section was such an experience It's all a sort of haze and i'm just doubting now that i even remember how much hard work its all going to be...ramble...ramble...

Some positive stories and possible tips pls?

Also, we have been co-sleeping with DS1 (14mths) but since getting 'big' DH has done the co-sleeping and i've been on sofa/spare bed. When i return from hospital am thinking to sleep in spare room with cot next to me leaving DH and DS as they are. Feel that 4 of us in the same room would be unfair to DS. What do you think?

Thank you. Just sitting at the PC having some headspace right now.

Oh, you'll be fine...

I had DS by planned section two years after DD (by emergency setion). I recovered faster on the second one, possibly due to mass consumption of Arnica.

I think to not disrupt the sleeping arrangement with your DH and DC1 is a good plan. When DS was born, DD and DH did more bonding. They went out on day trips to the zoo, etc. and I stayied home cuddled and breastfed. Perhaps you could tell your Dh that it is his job to take DC1 and you will look after DC2. And with the section you will need to him to take on bending / lifting duties for a while.

Good idea! Fortunately, I have my mum around a few days of the week for as long as she can be around which will be a fantastic help. DH is very, very busy at present and I'm not sure if i can really rely on him until evenings when i hope he'll be able to do bath/bed routine etc.. Nice idea for him to do things with DS1 while i spend time with baby. Cheers.

Is he taking any time off?

Yes, he has the actual day, the weekend and will be around as much as he can during that week although he will be pushed for time during the day. He is self-employed you see, no paternity leave and has just had some good work come through. He also studies and has a million and one things to do for uni. If he doesn't work and take jobs when they come in we are stuck! It's quite difficult.

Definitely a good idea to keep the sleeping arrangements as continuous as possible - but make sure you are sleeping in a decent bed if at all possible.

Please remember (something my wise HV told me and I ignored to my cost) that all the new baby needs is love and milk, but your firstborn needs his Mummy. Don't get too hung up on dh looking after ds1 while you look after dc2. Swop roles from time to time, even if it means dc2 getting a bottle.

I found breastfeeding dd to be a good time to sit on the sofa with ds as well and read to him. I'd trained him to hold the book on a cushin on his lap while I was pg, so that I had one arm around dd on the boob, and the other cuddling ds while I read to him. We never had problems with him disrupting feeds because he felt deprived of attention. But we did forget that he needs me as well as daddy, and it took a long time for ds1 and me to rebuild our relationship, and for him to learn to share his daddy with his little sister, once she got old enough to demand daddy's attention.

Good luck with the birth - after, as well, of course .