Home birth with your first baby

[betsycoe]

Hi,
I am hoping to have a home birth with my first baby and was wondering if anyone has any personal experience of this?

I havent but my friend had both of hers at home. With a birth pool. Both births went extremely well

Hi betsycoe - yes i had my first baby at home 3 months ago and would really recommend it although you will probably have to put up with lots of people saying "is that wise when its your first one?". I was pretty unsure about the idea but then read lots about it and felt happy in myself (and so did my dh!) about it and then I had a doula and an excellent midwife who really backed me all the way and reassured me. I also had a pool and gave birth in it which was awesome. Hey i could talk about it all day - if you wanna email me its rachelfarrier at hotmail dot com
don't know how to do the CAT thing! All the best anyway

I had homebirth with my first 6 months ago, great experience. Managed with just a TENS machine (ended up not hiring a pool, but did have a couple of baths). I had a straightforward pregnancy, so saw it as the obvious option. DH was initially not keen, but we went along to a local homebirth support group where women told their birth stories (the good and the bad) which really helped him to feel more confident.

I was going to but had to go in as my waters broke and he didn't arrive, as soon as I was in I lost control and didn't have the birth I wanted at all. Had my second at home and it was fab, go for it.

I'm 35+5 with my first and am planning a homebirth, so far no major objections from MW but lots of people tutting and saying 'you're nuts to have your first at home'...but unless they're offering to give birth for me than it's my choice lol. Only advice I can offer, given I haven't got there yet, is stick to your guns and just nod then ignore anyone with 'advice' you don't agree with.
And be aware that you may need to be assertive, people will suggest any tiny thing is a reason not to proceed with a homebirth (eg I had a checkup after a little bleeding at 24 weeks and my heartbeat was fast, not surprising given I was terrified, and MW said...with a fast heartbeat like this don't you think you should have the baby in hospital? WTF?) Go for it.

I kept a bit quiet about wanting a homebirth (obv not with the mw, lol) as I found it a bit wearing dealing with the 'you're brave/naive/a bit mad' comments before DS was born. As with anything to do with babies and birth, you can't plan too much anyway. One of my best friends was pg around the same time and was also planning for a homebirth, but her baby had other plans. The baby was big, and the labour started very fast, meconium in the waters etc. She almost ended up with an emergency c/s but at the last minute managed to deliver vaginally (in the operating theatre).

I was happy to plan for a homebirth, but knew that in an emergency I could transfer to hospital, nice to have the back up. If you do end up having to transfer, this is not a 'failure'. There was one point a couple of hours before DS was born where I was completely knackered, a bit afraid, and the pain was getting intense where I would have happily have said 'take me to hospital and give me drugs', BUT had a really supportive mw who examined me (hadn't had an examination up to that point) and told me that I was nearly there. That was the encouragement I needed to get through and apparently I perked up considerably . Sorry to write such an essay - i really could talk about this all day .

Is there anything particularly that you want to find out? Is your mw being supportive? Also, if you haven't checked it out already, would recommend the homebirth site here . Found it really useful.

I had my first at home 8 months ago. I didn't tell anyone about my plans - apart from dh and mw - because I knew that I really had to believe that I could do it if it had any chance of working and wouldn't be able to stand the incredulity of family/friends/strangers.

I really prepared (as much as I could) with natal hynotherapy cds and yoga. My dh and mws were really behind me too. I used tens, the bath, a hot water bottle and a little gas and air towards the end.

It was a fantastic fantastic experience - I really can't recommend it highly enough. The merits of home birth - being in a familiar, comfortable environment with your own food and drink, the attendance of two mws and being able to shower in your own bathroom and crawl into your own bed afterwards - are not to be underestimated. I still get a warm feeling when I walk over the place where my dd was born. I too could go on about this forever - I have a few friends who've had positive home birth experiences and we're all completely evangelical about it. Good luck!

Thanks so much for your replies!

My DH is also very unsure about a home birth but I'm absolutely convinced that it is the right thing for me.

Like some of you I've also been tutted at for considering a home birth for my first, but I was kind of expecting that. It's a good job that I'm stubborn or might have actually listened to them!

oh good on you betsy

I was booked for a HB with my first and was trasfered due to bleeding and ds having an irregular heart beat and so on.

The transfer was very very smooth and easy, despite this being exactly what you are warned against.

I say this NOT to put you off but to reassure you that if something does go wrong and you have to be transfered, it probably won't be the all flashing lights experience some lead you to believe. Becuase it is a HB you will be advised to transfer to be on the safe side if there is any sign of problems, so be confident in that. HB midwives are normally v experienced and know what they are doing!

Go for it betsy

Had my ds at home 4 weeks ago and was a fantastic experience. Couldn't ask for a better introduction to the joys of labour! Just fantastic to be able to curl up in bed with ds and dp after.

yes, wonderful birth, no pain relief.

I fully expected to be transferred to hospital but it didn't happen. I was secure however that I could go if I wanted to.

If it doesn't work out that you actually give birth at home, you will have had a great start in your own environment.

I can only add to the voices of others and say go for it! I had both of my children at home - both very different births, one in water one "on land" and didn't regret a thing.My MW lit candles in the bathroom and I had a fantastic first bath with my first baby before climbing into my bed .... luxury!With the second, my dd came into the room an hour after her brother was born and seeing them together made my heart melt.
I was always prepared to transfer immediately if my MW thought there was a problem. Not being fixed on one particular birth plan is the only advice I can give. I wish you lots of luck and a good birth whatever you decide x

Message withdrawn

I had planned a home birth with my first. Had to argue with the doctor for it a bit. Otherwise everyone else (important) was supportive, and lots of other first time mums jealous, strangely enough. I got transferred to hospital in the end, as dd was quite big (9lb 7) and got stuck and I needed my contractions starting again. No blue lights! I was still glad I started at home, as I didn't have that hassly is it time to go to the hospital yet thing, although filling the birthing pool that I hardly used was a nightmare, and I was a bit worried about our new sofa! Also, the hospital wasn't very far away, which reassured me.

I have a few friends who also had first time home births, for most it was great (well, relatively speaking), although one was quite traumatised by the experience as she was frightened by the pain and felt quite out of control and she decided to have her second in hospital.

Go for it if that's what you want - from all the stuff I read beforehand I seem to remember that if anything is going to go wrong, it's likely to do so quite slowly so there's time to go to hospital if necessary.

Good luck!

Would definitely recommend antenatal yoga (someone else mentioned this further down) if you can find a good class. I went to a class throughout my pregnancy, great to take an hour out of my working week and relax (you're entitled to time off for this as part of antenatal care). The breathing excercises and positions were really helpful, I moved about a lot and had a really active labour. My yoga teacher also did a birth prep class for couples which we went to about 4 weeks before I was due. DH fell asleep during the relaxation excercise at the end .

hi again betsycoe - forgot to say on my earlier post that i think i had extra confidence because the hospital is only a mile from where i live in case we had needed to transfer - might have felt differently if i lived out in the sticks - not saying that to put you off AT ALL but think that was an important part of my decision making. I am sure there are lots of ladies out there who have had a HB living in the middle of nowhere! My doula had had her children in a barn in the welsh countryside! All the best to you..

Hi Betsycoe,

Go for it! I'm also expecting my first and had been planning a home water birth. Unfortunately have had some complications with my pregnancy that prevent it, but I did masses of reading and research into home birthing, and it always would be my first preference. Don't be put off if your Midwife or GP isn't supportive - if your pregnancy is straightforward, then there is no reason why you shouldn't be considering a home birth.

Two books I'd read that I'd recommend reading by Janet Balaskas - 'Active Birth' and 'Water Birth' - full of practical and useful info about planning a home and/or water birth, but also really inspiring.

Best wishes with whatever you decide to do.
MM