Help - a bit lost!

[Rikke]

Hi there,

First of all what a terific website!

Im a young Danish girl 27yr and expecting our first child, im now 24 weeks. We moved to Ealing from Melbourne in December last year so everything is very new.

We were at the doctor this week for the first time to get the ball rolling and get in to system in regards to seeing midwifes and hospital.

A few things that has raised my concern was that the doctor advisd me I dont have a choise of hospital as im 'out late' so now im forced to give birth at Ealing hospital, can that be right ? I would have preferred to have a choise and some checking ....also not reading the best things about Ealing hospital, can that be right or do I actually have a choise like St Mary and West Middlesex ?

Another thing on my mind is midwives. Are they good at the hospital? or would you girls recommend to get a private midwife maybe for the antenatal face ?

Last thing, im starting to ache and get some pelvic pains and ofcourse im a little concerned. Are you girls familiar with any private places where we can go for scan just to make sure everything is ok or maybe if there are a 'walkin' maternity center with midwifes connected around West London ?

I would really appreciate your replies as it would help feeling a bit more secure and more in control with it all.

kindest regards
Rikke

Rikke,

You don't have to give birth there. Its your choice, you tell them where you want to birth.

Midwives vary everywhere and on every shift. Ive experienced the best and worst all at the same hospital.

There is a birthing centre in london, maybe try that for an alternative birth.

Hope this helps a little. If you want anymore info you can try the AIMS booklet called "Am I Allowed" which show you what your rights are.

Carly (Doula)

xxx

Hi Rikke

I would make an appointment to see your midwife, she will have a far better idea of what is available to you and the choice of hospitals in your area.

As in any area there are good and bad midwives and unfortunately it is down to luck, choosing a private midwife is a matter of choice but I would meet your own midwife first as (hopefully) she is the person you will see antenatally and postnatally, and you may find that you feel comfortable, and in control with her help, advice and support.

As for the pelvic pain you are getting it is most likely due to the hormonal affect on the joints and ligaments again this is something to discuss with your midwife who should be able to reassure you.

I really hope that you find the help and support you need from your community midwife

Helen

might be worth joining your local NCT too , they will have lots of information too and they also have mum & baby groups that might be good to join after baby is born...and run ante natal classes....

Hi Rikke

First of all congrats on your pregnancy and your move.

Second, go here: www.drfoster.co.uk/localservices/birthGuide.asp to find a list of available services in your area. Telephone each one and ask to visit it (if you have time), talk to the midwives.

I tend to find hospital midwives good, but it depends how busy they are on the night so it's not always predictable. If you want a straightforward labour, try and find a midwife led centre, much less likely to have horrible doctors wanting to poke you (my humble opinion obviously but it's not part of childbirth I'd want to sign up to).

In terms of your aches and pains, towards the end of pregnancy that is entirely normal, it's to do with relaxin (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Relaxin), the hormone which (hopefully) will help you get the baby out - it softens your ligaments. But if you are concerned, see your GP (doctor) or midwife and ask about it.

You might also want to look up the NICE guidelines here www.nice.org.uk/guidance/topic/gynaecology/?View=All&template=diseasetax.aspx

to find out what advice the doctors are following (or should be following) so you know how things work. Particularly this one www.nice.org.uk/page.aspx?o=321982&c=91520 on antenatal care.

Hope that helps.

good luck

Rachel

BTW, sorry I haven't put the links in properly so you'll have to copy and paste them into your browser (brain frazzled by 3 month old!)