they will let me have a section won't they?

[daisybo]

i'm currently 37+2 and got a meeting with consultant on monday to ask for an elec c-section and i'm now bricking it in case he says no. this is baby number 2, had a horrific delivery with ds1, 32 hrs, failed ventouse, forceps, haemmorhage, in hospital for a week, blood transfusions etc. i then suffered post traumatic stress disorder and post natal depression after his birth. i also had pain in the episiotomy scar for around a year, which due to the weight of this baby has started again (ds1 is now 2.7) and i also had faecal incontinence for approx 2 yrs after having him. i am currently booked for a vaginal delivery but i just know i can't go through it all again. it's not so much the delivery as i know second babys usually easier etc, it's the fear of the pain and incontinence afterwards returning that i just can't cope with. my last birth experience effectively ruined the year or so after and i just know i can't do it again.
do you think consultant will agree to a section? i really don't know what i'll do if he says no, as i'm kinda running out of time (ds1 was born at 38+5) not sure if all of this really constitues a 'medical' reason for a caesarean or not. anyone got any advise?!

daisybo, i will come with you, this is v close to my heart and you should get the birth you want

nr stourbridge so am booked at russels hall in dudley. i can see me turning into a blubbbering mess too, not good as i will have my 2 and aa half year old in tow!

i will come with you. will meet you in dudley my email is is [email protected]. thats if you want me

lol - show your consultant all these posts, then tell her/him we are all sitting in the waiting room!

Am sure you will be fine. Good idea to write stuff down so you don't forget. Can't see why they can honestly say no, but if they do be v. stubborn and stand up for what YOU want. As an earlier poster said, if your cons says no, then ask to see another. NO-ONE can make you do something you don't want to, especially given your 1st experience!!

Hope all goes the way you want it to.

lissielou, that is so sweet, but i kinda feel this is something i have to do by myself. i didn't stick up for myself when i had my little boy, so feel i need to do this myself iykwim. thankyou for all the support though, i already feel more reassured and confident about asking for what i want. i think i will def write down my reasons why i want this section and try and make him see i know about the risks and that i know a section isn't the 'easy' option. RHH does have a fairly high section rate so maybe he will be more sympathetic than i'm anticipating.....hope so anyway.

dont take any shit. i tried telling mw when i had ds that i had tiny hips but she wouldnt listen. so i ended up having a crash cs. dont give up. if you need support i only live in telford so just shout me

Daisyboo
Firstly

I can empathise with your first delivery, mine was simlilar to yours although I didn't have the post problems that you experienced. I can relate to the feelings towards another delivery and was also worried about seeing a consultant.
I have been told by mine that an elective cs after a birth like that is MY choice. They are happy to support whatever decision that I make at 36 weeks. I do strongly recommend that you write down exactly what your worries are when you go to see them. I went completely blank when I got in there so anything in writing is a very good idea. I dont think that they will refuse you a section, just be very clear about your reasons. Goodluck, will be thinking of you.

at the end of the day arnt they supposed to support you in whatever you decide you want c-section dont mean to sound horrible but most 2nd bambinos are bigger tell him if you dont get want you want grab him by the b and tell him to go through it lol also you tell him once baby is delivered youngest wants to see also less stress for you then
ill shut up now but GOOD LUCK HUNNI BE THINKING ABOUT YOU ALL

Daisyboo I have had a similar battle (3rd degree tear last time). From my experience when you go to see the consultant you will normally see a registar who works for the consultant.

My advice would be that if the resistar does not agree on a section then insist on seeing the consultant there and then.

I did a post earlier in the week as I had seen a very horrible registar for my 2nd consultants's appointment who basically said I was making a fuss over nothing and there was no reason whatsoever I couldn't have a vaginal birth.

Luckily my GP, the doctor who had examined me post birth and the registar I had seen at my previous appointment had all said they would advise a C section so I stood firm and demanded to see the consultant immediately (who also agreed to a section.)

I hope you are lucky and have no such battles but stand firm if anyone tells you you can't have a section (should you want one) as it is entirely your choice as it is your body.

Would agree that most consultants and registars seem very sympathetic but if you have the misfortune to see someone as horrible as I did then take a deep breath and don't take no for an answer. (I also burst into tears which seemed to help so don't be afraid to cry !)

Thinking of you.

luckily i get to see the actual consultant (well i did the last time anyway) and he seems like a nice bloke, so hopefully he will understand and support me....one can live in hope!! i've also managed to arrange childcare for ds1 so i'll be able to concentrate fully on talking to him about why i want this section.
just wondering if he does agree to the elective, are there any other questions i should ask him, bearing in mind they will prob do it within the next 10 days! do you have much say in what happens during and after the op or is it pretty much down to the hospital? would it be worth writing a birth plan, and what kinds of things should i put on it?
sorry about all the questions, just want to get all the info i can before meeting tomorrow. thanks girls xxx

I would ask the time of the operation and what happens if there are any delays. This may be very important if you have arranged childcare.

What is the last time you can eat or drink pre operation.

If you want to hold the baby/feed straight away then ask if it will be possible.

If you want music played ask if this is possible.

Who will be doing the op.

Do you have to go in to the hospital pre operation to fill in paperwork - if so, when.(our hos call this pre clerking)

Can't think of any more but perhaps someone else can help.

Hope it all goes well and don't take no for an answer.

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just to let you all know, after waiting for an hour and a half and gearing myself up to argue my case i saw the consultant who said, yup, fine, whatever you want! ceasarean is booked for next weds (24th) which is bang on 39 weeks and they said if i go into labour before then, they will just do it when i come in.
what a relief, and thanks so much for all your support and advice

That's good news for you Daisybo

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So pleased for you x Will look out on the announcements!

excellent news x

I am really pleased Daisyboo and look forward to hearing about your new arrival. X

thats fab!! fingers crossed

Thats fantastic xx

really chuffed for you. i'm in on the 26th for the same thing! such a relief isn't it!