4 years ago I had DD at 38 weeks, induced due to diabetes.
I am nearly 13 weeks with my second and beginning to think about the next delivery. It will be another 38 week induction.
I had a difficult labour as it came on quickly and I wasn't allowed to move off my back due to continuous monitoring. After a long stage of pushing 8lb11oz DD was delivered with mid cavity forceps. Later we were told there was cephalopelvic disproportion i.e. Her head was too big for my narrow pelvis. The first attempt at forceps didn't work, a more senior member of the team came in and delivered DD. Her face was injured, with the top layer of skin basically shorn off in large patches on each cheek. She attended the wound care clinic for more than 18 months and still has very light scarring on her cheeks (most people wouldn't notice it) plus a large teardrop shaped scar at the edge of one eye socket, caused by skin splitting and crushing. I had a post partum haemorrhage and we were in for a week following delivery as Group B strep was detected in DD's wound.
I feel like something went wrong, but everything has been played down (covered up?). Obviously I am glad to have a healthy child but I feel sad that my daughter was in a lot of pain early on and has these scars, I'm not sure it was necessary. I also have mild rectocele.
I attend the high risk obstetric clinic but haven't seen a senior member of the team yet. I've been told they'll expect another vaginal delivery. I'd prefer this, but not if it is likely to mean similar outcomes for me and the new baby! Not sure how to proceed. I am worried no one will be honest with me as I think they were scared of being used last time (couldn't get a minute to myself in hospital without someone popping in from the medical team for a visit - not a consultation).
Just not sure how to proceed, or if I have too negative a view of my last birth.