I'm so scared

[Danielle299]

Hi, I just need a bit of a rant really, me and my daughters dad broke up nearly 2 years ago, we got back together last year and was great, we decided to try for baby no2 and I got pregnant, I'm 12 weeks, the last few weeks he has been strange and in a weird mood, on Wednesday he went in 1 of these moods and didn't speak to me until last night. I don't know why he was being like this, anyway he was being really horrible to me last night and I decided enough was enough and kicked him out. It's for the best but I'm feeling so upset and depressed. I love him so much but he's so nasty sometimes. I had an emergency c-section with my 3yo I didn't go into labour so didn't experience contractions. I'm now really scared about what's going to happen when I have this baby. I'm scared of being alone in labour. I know hundreds of women go through labour and childbirth alone but it's so scary.

First of all well done on ending the relationship and being strong

You've still got some time to plan before the baby arrives, do you have a family member or friend that could be with you during the birth? If you feel too anxious about labour by yourself then you could have a chat with your consultant (are you under an obstetrician when having a VBAC?) or midwife and discuss the possibility of ELCS.

I have my nanna. Whom I live with 😊 she's amazing. I also have a lot of family and friends support. It's just hard because we were so happy. I don't know what's wrong with him. I don't really want another c-section if I can help it. I'm seeing a consultant in April so will know more about that then xx

Well done on kicking him out! Your children will benefit from not watching you put up with him treating you badly.

It's brilliant that you have your nana on hand , all you need is someone to be quietly supportive. There have been studies that show women who have been through labour themselves are the most helpful birth partners, so you've got that one sorted. You'll have the midwife there too who should be very encouraging and supportive, I really liked mine.

And, honestly, labour is horrible but it doesn't last forever. At the end you have your baby and there's a sense of satisfaction and achievement - try to focus on that rather than the fear.

Can you book yourself into some birthing classes? Write down any questions you have for the consultant so you can talk through your concerns.

You're on the right track already, you're going to be great