Please help - in agony from episiotomy

[londonliv]

I'm hoping someone can help me. 5 days ago I had my ds. Unfortunately after a long labour on G&A he was stuck & I ended up being rushed into theatre & having a ventouse & episiotomy.
I am home & in absolute agony. It takes me five minutes to get in & out of bed & even turning over is painful. DH has to come and take ds out of his crib & put him next to me to feed as I just can't do it.
Even more worryingly I cant sit on the loo any more to pee but have to hover above. I could at the hospital but am not sure if my painkillers were stronger then or if things feel tighter/more painful.
The MW came on 2 days ago & said the stitches looked fine but the are absolute agony. I am trying to wash with water several times a day & let it air dry naturally to & have been putting witch hazel on my pads but it feels worse not better.
Can anyone tell me when it might improve? Is this normal? I am in tears all the time because I just want to look after & enjoy my ds but I can't do anything as I'm in agony. Also I am meant to go to the clinic today to get him weighed but can literally barely walk even though the hospital is 5 mins away. Can I ask them to come to me?
Any help or advice would be much appreciated - I feel so hopeless right now

Oh you for love, I completely sympathise with you, I had one with my first and it was so sore.

Firstly, it could be bruising pain that hurts, not the stitches. My arse was black from the ventouse. Get some arnica tablets and cream.

Also take paracetamol and ibuprofen one after the other at the minimum time allowed eg: paracetamol first, ibuprofen 2 hours later, paracetamol 2 hours after the ibuprofen etc so there's no gap iyswim.

2 shallow baths a day with lavender oil (just a few drops) and a cup of milk in the water. Helps with bruising.

Have you got a feeding pillow? Like a Boppy? Bugger feeding with it, sit on it! It will help to take that pressure off your nethers.

Take a small dose of lactulose as a precaution to help with going to the loo. You can buy it from chemists. Use moist toilet wipes. I would imagine your bum is quite sore too.

Get some short tip top lollies for the freezer. Wrap them in gauze and apply to your bits. Not dignified at all but so helpful.

Rest. Do not overdo. Get everyone to do everything for you.

Aww bless you and congratulations on your baby
Hovering is fine, what also helped me was pressing hard with the flannel and sitting tipped slightly forward iyswim? A few times a day soak your bum in warm water with a few drops of lavender or teatree oil. Sit on cushions. Just working out, mine were sorest at about 5-6 days. I asked and they said because the stitches are tightening at that stage.
It will get better, promise! X

Oh bless you, I remwmbwr it getting worse about then too (and poss about day 10ish as well?)I don't know if it was swelling or stitches tightening or what but it hurt like buggery!

Remember to stagger your drugs so you take something every 2 hours ish (I think I had paracetamol and aspirin. I can't remember if I had co-codamol too?)

Try and do very little, plonk your bum down with baby and leave everything else for your husband. Also, I poured water over me when I peed - it took away the sting.

I hope your feeling better soon ??

Hmmm, the ?? Was meant to be flowers! Not sure what happened there!

Also, I would insist they come to you. Phone community midwives and explain. If they refuse, just make it clear that you won't be attending. You gave birth 5 days ago. It's too soon for you clearly. Round my way, they come to the house for the first 10 days at least.

You need it checked out properly - you poor thing

Call the maternity unit - most will accept calls up to 4 weeks after delivery. Tell them you are in agony and you are coming in (with the baby) and need checked by the obs. Be polite but firm. This will be the quickest way to get it dealt with - if you go to the GP, they will just refer you up to the hospital if it needs restitching.

In my experience, most community midwives are pretty crap. It's just a box ticking exercise for them and they want in and out of the house ASAP - you need to go straight to someone who can Actually help you

I had a episiotomy and forceps with ds last year and I felt absolutely dreadful for 2 weeks. I think the pain seemed to peak at about 10 days but then rapidly improved after that. It was made worse by at uti because I was avoiding going to the toilet I think.

Just to let you know it does get better but takes a bit of time. If the MW is happy with you then I'm sure everything's fine. Have you tried putting your witch hazel in the fridge?

Oh how horrible. This was me 2 years ago and will probably be me in approximately a month as well!
I second what people have said. My episiotomy stitches were agony. They opened after a few days which was even worse. I hadn't had the lactulose advice and having a poop was agony!

Tea tree drops in a shallow bath twice a day and lots of air drying helped me. Other than the opened stitch, I was feeling much better after about 10 days.

Congratulations on your little one

Thank you so much. Both surgeon & midwives have told me not to have baths to not make the stitches dissolve too quickly.
I had been wondering if it was coccyx pain initially as he was back to back & I was pushing for ages but it really seems to be the stitches. They feel really tight & stinging - could that be them tightening? I wasn't sure if this was something that would feel worse before it got better iykwim?
Will tell the midwives that I can't come in & beg them to come to me. The thought of walking over there is just unimaginable right now

I took max doses of paracetamol and ibuprofen (the ibuprofen was especially helpful because it's good for swelling).

I also resorted to putting an ice pack wrapped in a towel on it at points!

When the bleeding reduced, I found it was much more comfortable to keep restrictive clothing (aka, pants!) off as often as I could. You could try sitting on something waterproof with an old towel on top if you thought it would help.

Maybe get a second opinion on the stitches? Is there another midwife or GP you could see?

The other thing (tmi apologies) I managed a bit of a BM movement yesterday but it really hurt & was accompanied by a lot of blood - could I have torn the stitches?

Aw so sorry you're feeling rough, congratulations on your DS

Didn't have an episiotomy but didn't want to read and run. You WILL get better and feel better, but it will take weeks to months, and that's perfectly normal. I remember feeling dreadful for the first few weeks because I felt so dreadful, IYSWIM? I think I expected to feel rough but be able to function normally after I had DD but the reality of the first couple of weeks was that I couldn't do much at all. It hit me like a ton of bricks mentally. Be kind to yourself, take time for your body to heal and take all the painkillers you can. It really will be for a short time in the scheme of things. As for weighing, the midwives should do it when they come out to see you instead of you having to go out - when's your next visit?

london Your midwife should check your stitches when she comes out, but if you can use a mirror or get your DH to have a look that could put your mind at rest. If you're still worried and midwives are no help then call the GP and ask for them to come and do a post-partum check. Hopefully you haven't torn anything but it's just normal post-birth blood loss being squeezed out. I remember feeling like I was pooing glass for about 6 weeks after DD, it was awful but again it WILL get better, just try and get through it, as as another poster has said stuff like lactulose can help. Also, if you were pushing for a long time you might have some piles? Did they say anything about that at the hospital?

God childbirth is rough isn't it??

Try rolling a large-ish towel up, then curl it round into a circle and sit on it - you are probably bruised, and this will take your weight off the sorest bits. Good luck.

The lots of blood won't be from the stitches, that's likely to just be lochia.

You need a mw to come and check them again. I had exactly what you describe and my external stitches had come loose (they just do a continuous running stitch externally). MW removed the stitches and the pain went away. Having the stitches removed meant it took longer to heal, but the internal stitches were still in so its not like you're left with a big gapping wound or anything.

You must get this looked at today, you don't need to put up with pain like that.

My advice, get to the gp or gp to come to you, I had stitches with my first, nasty second degree tear, was in agony and tears as you describe, midwife kept telling me it was normal, saw gp on day 13, turned up at surgery in tears, turns out stitches were infected, got antibiotics and the pain finally started to ease. Also was prescribed tons of co-cocodamol.

Please don't suffer like I did, thinking its normal, just keep shouting about your pain til someone listens.

Really hope you feel better soon

Have a shallow warm bath with natural salt to help healing. Helped my tear immensely

Thank you. I spoke to the midwife who said to go to gp - have an appt for 11 but am dreading journey there. Midwife said I would still have to come in to them either tomorrow or day after - something to do with a newborn test that has to be done between 5 - 8 days?

That's good you have a GP appointment. Increased pain can often be caused by infection so good your getting it checked out.

The midwives need to do the heal prick test on the baby. I would ask for someone to come out to you, there will be midwives available in the community somewhere to do this.

The whole making women travel for early post partum care is a cost cutting thing and pretty despicable IMO. If you're not well enough to travel, they need to come to you. Be firm. Hope you feel better soon

OP if you're not well enough to travel you can ask for home visits from the GPs and midwives.x

Also the bleeding with pooing is probably piles. Very common after labour. Ask the GP to have a look while you're there and they can give you something for it.

Having a poo was terrifying after my episiotomy - I hated it and cried with fear and pain. Lots of laxatives and having my feet raised on a foot stool when on the toilet helped a lot. Helps with the positioning and gravity apparently.

Thank you so much for all your help. I'm just back from the gp - the stitches are infected so she's given me some antibiotics & also stronger painkillers to try & help with the pain. Also some lactulose to help soften things up which should hopefully make things a bit easier.
I'm really hoping this will now be the turning point.

Try putting witch hazel soaked pads in sandwich bags and keeping them in the freezer until you need them. This helped me massively after 3rd degree tear. Hope you feel better soon once antibiotics kick in.

This thread brings back awful memories

My best advice:

• Forget underwear. Just wrap a towel around your lower body. Don't care when you bleed on it.
• Wash with water (don't use paper) after the toilet. Dry with cool hairdryer.
• Take a composite Vitamin B pill every time you take the antibiotic to prevent thrush (then you'll be in real trouble).
• Some weeks (months?) later, when the wound is completely closed, get Contractubex and use it to massage the scar tissue at least twice a day. Stick a bit inside and massage that area from the inside, as well.

Good luck. I know it's hell.

God remember this well!!! Many years ago though

I was in labour 23 hours and tore myself and ended up having ventouse

Get yourself a swimming ring to sit on!! Helped me in early days