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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Watching my own c'section - shall i?

24 replies

xenabelly · 13/11/2006 22:03

I am currently 30wks pregnant with baby no 2 and am swaying towards having a planned c'section (for various reasons).

However, one of my concerns is that with baby no 1 i found (and still do) it difficult to believe that she was 'my' baby, because i couldn't feel a thing and she didn't cry when she came out, the midwife took her off to a corner to clean her up and first time i saw her she was all wrapped up in a white blanket all cosy and clean and fast asleep. My husband saw her when she was all bloody and he can't understand how i can't relate to the fact that she grew inside me. It was like they got the baby from under the table and just showed me 'a baby'.

I'm going to a different hospital this time and they have said they will show be the baby covered in blood and it will be in my eyeline being cleaned up but i'm still not very confident same thing won't happen again. I read somewhere that you can ask for the screen to be lifted right at the end so you can actually watch baby coming out and wondered if

this is true?
shall i ask or is it wierd?
will it be too gruesome?

My husband reckons it will be really grusome BUT i pointed out that I won't be able to see inside myself, will just be able to see over my bump (and he can close his eyes)

Anyone else experienced this or knows what I'm talking about?

OP posts:

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lulumama · 13/11/2006 22:07

i felt like that after my emergeny c.s..this baby arrived next to me dressed, washed and pink

you can request the baby given to you immediately,for skin to skin contact and to go to the breast if you breast feeding

1 - yes it is true
2 yes you should ask
3 not it won't be - you will see the baby not your innards!

make sure everyone is aware of your requirements..!

PS have you considered a vaginal delivery..or is that not an option medically, then you are very much involved in the birth process.....x

biglips · 13/11/2006 22:08

i would've of fainted on the table as i cannot stand the sight of blood coming out of me (honest!! )

zippy34 · 13/11/2006 22:18

I think if it came to it, that's what I'd want too. I'm ridiculously unsqueamish and I'd like to see the process if possible - would make me feel less passive and more involved iyswim?

I think you should go for it if you think it'll make you feel better about the birth. You can always change your mind. I think it's quite standard practice also though to give you the baby straight away after a cs and not clean it up first so you would get much quicker contact which might also help?

Toady · 13/11/2006 22:18

Personally i couldn't, i would probably faint or worse.

zippy34 · 13/11/2006 22:19

Not that I'm saying that having a cs is a "passive" process . That sounds bad.

Uwilalalalalala · 13/11/2006 22:22

Yuck. I wouldn't want to do that. But, hey, if it appeals to you go for it.

lulumama · 13/11/2006 22:23

DH gave me a running commenrtary of mine...

oneweemite · 13/11/2006 22:25

you can definitely watch the baby coming out. have worked in a hospital where they did it fairly routinely (after asking the mum if she wanted it) but had dd in a different hospital, had emergency(ish) c-section and they didn't pull the screen down. never thought to ask cos i thought they'd do it. did see her all covered in blood tho, and the look on dh's face cos he saw it all!!!

zippy34 · 13/11/2006 22:25

That's the only problem - dh would need a separate screen to hide behind... would completely freak him out!

asur · 13/11/2006 22:28

I know what you mean about not knowing the baby. I could hear DS screaming at the other side of the room then he was brought over all wrapped up and handed to DH, I didn't really feel like he was 'mine' at all.

LOL at squeamish DH's - practically the first thing DH said to me when we were in the recovery room was "you hardly have any fat in there!" I didn't know if it was a compliment or not but he was obviously paying attention to it all!

plibble · 13/11/2006 22:29

I know what you mean! I can sort of remember seeing my DD naked before they had trimmed the umbilical cord, but it is all a bit blurry and the next time she appeared she was wrapped in a towel. To make matters worse, she kept slipping out of her tags and so in my most tired moments, I thought there must have been a mix up (never mind that she's the spit of me but with her father's eyes...)!

The birth plan section of this website has some good ideas that might help you feel more involved in the birth process.

I don't think it is too gory if they lower the screen (although I screamed "Noooooo!" when they attempted to do it), as I am informed that your bump will block the view anyway unless you use a mirror.

oneweemite · 13/11/2006 22:32

dh was behind a screen but was too nosey and kept peeking round think he was a bit shocked that he was so squeamish as he's a doc!!

MKG · 13/11/2006 22:36

This is more for your dh
When my sister in law had her 3rd C-section in January her husband was allowed in the room for the first time (They're from Mexico and there, fathers aren't allowed for the surgeries) He made the mistake of peeking over the curtain, and saw everything. Tell your dh that curiosity does kill the cat.
Here in the US it is normal for the curtain to be moved so the mom can see the baby, and the baby is usually given to mother unless there is a medical reason.

nearlythree · 13/11/2006 22:37

We asked for both our planned section babies to be handed to us before being cleaned up for a cuddle. It was so lovely to have them with their vernix on. You can also ask for lots of other stuff like skin-to-skin, and using your own blanket with your scent on for baby to be wrapped in. My main memory of ds's birth is that as he appeared he showered the anaesthetist's assistant in pee! Dh was hilarious at both of them, trying so hard not to see what was going on. He got very worried at dd's birth as he saw them go off with lots of bits and wondered if I still needed them!

Skribble · 13/11/2006 22:45

Haven't read all posts but TBH I wouldn't want to see me, IYKWIM, but I did see baby lifted up all bloody and all and got to touch them briefly. They wrapped DD quickly and DH nuzzeled her into my cheek straight away. Plus they put her inside my nightie in the recovery room she was still a bit sticky . I was too cold to heat her up so they had to wrap her up and put her on an electric blanket. I felt the pulling and pushing was strange enough.

jampots · 13/11/2006 22:47

im sure i read somewhere about a guy who performs c/s where the mum is very much part of the proceedings. Something like he delivers the baby onto the tummy with cord intact or something. must have been on Mumsnet though as cant imagine why i would have seen it otherwise. sounded quite nice in a weird sort of wy. the other alternative of course if to have it videoed and then you can watch it when you've healed

nearlythree · 13/11/2006 23:00

I'd quite liked to have watched mine some time later but our hospital doesn't allow cameras of any kind.

jampots · 13/11/2006 23:49

its a diy caesarean - the mum lifts her baby from the womb apparentltly. if you google diy caesarean you get a bmj story on one

Bluebear · 14/11/2006 00:02

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

eidsvold · 14/11/2006 00:48

dh got to see dd2 lifted out and cut the cord - she did however have a good set of lungs on her and I heard her the second she was lifted from me. SHe did come to me all wrapped up but I could see her being weighed etc. Unwrapped her and put her down the hospital gown when we got in recovery.

Dd1 I saw in passing as she was whisked to ICU - they did not let dh see her being born or cut the cord - they were worried what state she was in.

Like someone else who said I saw bits in the overhead lights BUT i am a big wuss when it comes to things like that - don't think I would like to see what was going on or the baby coming out of my tummy.

lemonaid · 14/11/2006 00:58

I would have asked for the screen to be lowered last time if I'd thought of it, but it was an unplanned c/s and I didn't (think of it). If I end up with a c/s next time I will definitely ask for it (and would rather like a mirror) -- and think that you should too if you feel this way about it.

At my emergency c/s they would have given DS directly to me but I had a bad case of the shakes from the anaesthetic so I didn't feel confident taking him and asked for him to go to DH instead.

ghosty · 14/11/2006 06:11

Haven't read the rest of the answers xenabelly ...
but your OP struck a chord with me ...

I had the same problems as you with my first - didn't feel he was 'my' baby and I felt that for all I knew he could have been got out of a cupboard and given to me ... I remember looking as him when they lifted him over the screen and thinking, "Oh, a baby."

Anyway ... fast forward 4 years and the experience was completely different with DD. I DIDN'T have a screen up AT ALL! But it is almost completely impossible to see your own section - I was lying flat and I could lift my head up but if you think about it you have this huge bump that you would have to sit up to see over - and that is impossible when you have had a spinal block .... Also the anaesthetist sat at my head with DH and kept chatting to me ...
So, I didn't see ANY gory bits at all (though DH did and looked a little green ) ... BUT I had the huge satisfaction and pleasure of seeing them lift my DD OUT of my body - couldn't feel a thing but was aware of all the 'rummaging' then saw them pull her out ...
It was the most amazing experience of my life and as close as I will ever get to giving birth naturally (long story but c/sections are my only way)...
I saw her come out of my body, and she was MINE ALL MINE!!!!!

Ask for them not to put a screen up .... honestly, it is sooooo worth it

hub2dee · 14/11/2006 07:54

It's rare of me not to read a thread before I post but I've got to jump into the shower... just wanted to quickly say I took a PILE of photos at dw's CS. Stayed 'behind the curtain' but you get shots of baby being carried to clean-up area, initial breathing checks etc. Having dh with a camera and shooting a pile of images might also be something useful for you ? If you don't have a decent camera or dh isn't into photos a photographer could do it for you, but there are limits to number of people in theatre etc. and you'd probably want your birth partner there IYSWIM.

xmasstocking · 14/11/2006 08:12

Have to agree with most of the posts on here - I really wish that I had seen my c-section - I hadn't even realised it was an option to ask them to lower the screen otherwise I would have done. It also took me a while to accept DS was mine as he was whisked away to be cleaned up and weighed etc - I remember asking DH over and over if it was a boy cos nobody told us.

If we have another baby, chances are I will opt for an c-section and will def ask for the screen to be lowered so go for it.

LOL at Asur - my DH said exactly the opposite to yours - he said do you realise how much fat you have in there (nice husband I have!)

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