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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

How long did you wait til you looked 'down there'?!

40 replies

nk1605 · 25/03/2015 09:47

I had a normal vaginal delivery a week ago with a 2nd degree perineal tear. stitches in and midwives said they're healing well.

it's all still quite sore down there and I haven't been able to bring myself to take a look! I know I'm going to have to eventually but how long did it take you to? I'm so scared of the difference!!

OP posts:
Eminybob · 25/03/2015 09:52

I still haven't and DS is 8.5 mo!

To be honest I didn't make much of. Habit of looking down there before I had him either.

CoodleMoodle · 25/03/2015 09:53

I had a ventouse delivery and an episiotomy. Took me a good couple of weeks but when I did look I was okay with it. I was more shocked when I felt how low down the (tiny) scar was!

BigBoobiedBertha · 25/03/2015 09:56

I would never think to have to have a look. I couldn't have recognised myself in a line-up before I had children and I don't now either. I really wouldn't worry about it.

If there is problem, ask the midwife to check it is all OK.

FernGullysWoollyPully · 25/03/2015 10:02

I had an episiotomy and ventouse with my first and I needed to apply arnica cream to the bruising. I looked probably sooner than I should have really. It looked like road kill down there and I sobbed!!

Had an episiotomy with my second also and a very small tear (no stitches) with my third, nothing with fourth. Had no problem looking those times. Nothing ever looked as bad as with DC1, I think I got used to it!

Reekypear · 25/03/2015 10:07

You should be familiar with down there as you need to be able to spot important changes, just like you would with breasts. So when you heal it might be worth getting to know yourself.

TheMoa · 25/03/2015 10:09

I'm nearly 40.

I have never thought to look, not once in my entire life, and childbirth didn't change that.

What are you looking for?

Mouthfulofquiz · 25/03/2015 10:13

Just have a look - it's no big deal! You should have a little check to see that it is healing and nothing to concern you.

strawberrydaquari · 25/03/2015 10:13

I remember looking a few weeks after having dd1, I cried as well.

Really though it settled down

SunnyBaudelaire · 25/03/2015 10:15

lol it was 16 years ago and I never had a look!

Original poster
nk1605 · 25/03/2015 10:15

I'm not looking for anything in particular, I suppose I don't need to look but I don't want to be afraid of looking if I ever have to. I think I'll wait til my 6 week check up!

OP posts:
GotToBeInItToWinIt · 25/03/2015 10:20

DD is 16 months and I haven't looked! I had a second degree tear and never had my stitches checked (I couldn't bear for anyone to go near the area for a while so always refused when the midwives asked) and it wasn't checked at the 6 week check. It feels ok and sex feels fine so I'm living in blissful ignorance Smile

5madthings · 25/03/2015 10:24

Wait a bit! I looked quite soon after ds1 and everything was still all swollen etc and it was a bit of a shock. By six weeks is good ad swelling will be gone and should all be looking more normal!

ChickenMe · 25/03/2015 13:38

I only looked about a week later. I got DH to bring a mirror to the hosp. I had mid-forceps and episiotomy so I was scared to look too. 10 days later it is all rather sore including my bum!Sad

NickyEds · 25/03/2015 13:43

15 months and still not gone there. I had two second degree and a first degree tears, which all needed stitching. I could feel the swelling for the first few weeks and that was more than enough thank you. DP says that there's no difference but he's probably lying!

Strokethefurrywall · 26/03/2015 18:07

I remember looking down in that lovely blissful shower abut 30 minutes after DS1 was delivered and my immediate reaction was "FUCK!" - looked like a bomb had gone off in my lady garden.
I only had a small episiotomy and didn't look too far down to see the stitches or anything - healed wonderfully though and I learned my lesson not to look down after the uneventful birth of DS2.

monkeyfacegrace · 26/03/2015 18:11

Dd is 20 says old.

I had to look the same evening as delivery as I had to put my piercing back in Grin

I'm pleased to report everything is normal and working as it should Wink

BumpyPhee · 26/03/2015 19:16

Lol Strokethefurrywall, i was the same, peeked during my post labour shower and was horrified. I had no idea of the bruising amd swelling that would happen Shock

seaoflove · 26/03/2015 21:41

I had a proper look, with a mirror, after about five days. I had a tear repaired in theatre and thought I was riddled with external stitches. As it was, they were all internal so it looked better than I'd anticipated!

How sad that some adult women don't know what their own genitals look like, and think it's strange to look.

ambientolf · 26/03/2015 21:48

I'm pregnant with my first & this is quite a scary thread! What exactly changes? I just figured it would all pop back into place with maybe a few stitches (blissful ignorance on my part)... wait actually, don't answer my question, I'm going to keep thinking it does Grin

Riri85 · 26/03/2015 21:48

Still haven't and my LO is 6 months!??

GraysAnalogy · 26/03/2015 21:49

You've never looked at your vulva or vagina MrsMoa Confused

BumpyPhee · 26/03/2015 22:18

Lol ambientolf, it didnt occur to me either but i suppose when you think about it, it does stand to reason that there will be a degree of trauma down there. Don't worry yourself about it, it looks and sounds a lot worse than it actually is. I found i was pretty numb down there while the swelling was there. It all goes back to normal before you know it, and to be honest you dont care by that point as your too busy admiring your gorgeous baby to care about yourself x

AlpacaMyBags · 26/03/2015 22:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NightLark · 26/03/2015 22:42

It took me a year to look first time, and the tiny, slivery, 'hockey-stick' episiotomy scar was a great relief. By third time I looked far too early (weeks rather than months), and couldn't make much sense of the mess that I saw after shoulder dystocia, internal and external tearing. Grim. Still looks weird to me, nearly four years on. But it probably is weird, compared to how it used to be...

thenightsky · 26/03/2015 22:48

DD is 28 years old so I cannot recall exactly when I looked, but I think it was a day or so after I came home.

Remains of a Sunday roast thrown on a plate is all I recall.

28 years later it ain't any better Grin