Home birth and visitors

[3cupsoftea]

We live with my in laws currently (building an extension on the house for us) all fine, we get on great.

Dc is on the way and we are planning a home birth. I'm guessing the in laws will bigger off while I'm in labour and then come home. What I'm worried about is my hubbys giant extended family. They will all want to descend asap to see baby and I'm worried without the rules of a maternity ward we are going to be inundated.

Or will people stay away?

Make it clear before you have the baby that you will not have any visitors until you say so.

Well we were discharged 3 hours after having DD so similar to a home birth in terms of visitors. We just told people we wanted a few days to settle in as a family. To be honest we treated each visitor on a case by case basis. Some people we said 'can you come next week?', some we were happy to have drop in for half an hour after a day or two. Just tell people what you want!

They will not stay away unless told to. Trust me. They won't.

You need to be clear there aren't to be any visitors until you say so. And appeal to your PIL and get them on your side and putting out the same message. It might come as a bit softer a message coming from your MIL.

You will need to be very clear about when and who can come. Both of mine were born at home, DS was born at 23:07 didn't get to bed until 3 in the morning, MIL was at the door at 09:00, and then FIL and stepmother in law turned up at 22:00, I was shattered!

With DD I had to put my foot down and despite feeling like I was being completely out of order I was very strict. DD was born at 01:45 and the only person allowed in was my mum, and then mum brought DS and my Dad at my request and kept my brother at bay. No-one else at all that day, although hubby did let a neighbour in while I was asleep after apologizing in-case we kept them up, which we didn't, and couldn't believe was DD had been born lol. Stick to your guns and don't under estimate how tired you will be.

We just had a visiting schedule in advance. We had parents the day after she was born then our siblings the day after. I text people and made arrangements rather than leaving then to pester me and that way I had control.
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