Trying to prepare for 'mode of delivery' chat with OB next week....

[Eliboo]

...I'll only be 32+ weeks, so it seems a bit early, but its only a 'chat'. The OB is supportive and very nice, but still - want to do my bit and get informed and ready, and am sure there are ??s and angles I haven't thought of. The choice will be between a trial of labour, and a VBAC....induction may be out, depending on what my bp does (if on meds, its out). Going much overdue may be out (due to bp and age, when they worry more about placental problems).
The reasons I may be better off with an elective section this time: age (mid forties); fairly big baby and small me; one previous full term pg ending in high bp, failed induction (no dilatation, weak contractions), and e-section at 39+ weeks.
ATM baby is mostly breech, occasionally transverse, just as dd was till the end - but its too early to tell, right?
Oh, and no Braxton Hicks yet either.
Part of me thinks I'd be exhuasted by a trial of labour, and should really just go for safer and less exhausting. I have a 2.10 yr old dd, and need to think of her too.
BUT part of me would really like to give it a go....if baby turns head down, bp is ok, etc. Maybe I'm being wistful and unrealistic though? I'm honestly not going to be gutted if it has to be a section - yes I'll have feelings about it, but what I want most is a safe baby and a safe me. But I don't want to leap straight to section if its really not necessary, either.
Any thoughts? Any other angles to ask about I haven't thought of? Just needing to brainstorm a bit before going in there...

If you get as far as going overdue you can ask for a scan to check your placenta

What has your midwife recommended so far?
Have you any idea of what course the OB will advise?

When you talk of the 'safer and less exhausting' option do you mean a cs?

As far as your dd goes, I had a vbac and was home the same day to see my ds, whereas if I'd had the cs I would have been in hospital for several days.
(I also had an induction which ended in cs but the difference is that I was having contractions so a successful vbac was fairly promising - maybe your lack of contractions means they might recommend a cs)

No recommendations so far. I'm under OB care (considered high risk due to age, mostly) and she said early on that if we lined up 10 OBs they would probably all say 'elective' based on previous history, but that she was happy to wait and see, especially if it mattered a lot to me. I suspect baby's position and my bp are going to swing it one way or the other - but she's definitely not a section-advocate on the whole, unlike my last one, who was a nightmare and decided I would 'end up with a section' from when I was barely 13 weeks pregnant
'Less exhausting' meant an elective as opposed to a trial of labour ending in an elective...and 'safer' meant an elective if I have highish bp. It did scare me last time, that bp thing.
But oh how I'd love to be home with both dds a bit faster!

One possible reason it failed last time, btw, was that I had excess amniotic fluid and dd's head floated away from my cervix - no pressure on it whatsoever. I had very weak cx, even after three loads of gels.

And thanks for the scan thought Blonde, thats true - I will ask about that.

Eliboo, what a hard decision. Can you wait a bit longer before choosing which way to go? You may find you have the decision made for you, by eg the baby staying in breech/transverse position, so it may not be worth lots of agonising now.

I'm in a similar position to you, although only 21 weeks pregnant and "only" 39! I'm 90% sure I will go for the elective but I have moments of doubt. As you say, it would be lovely to get out of hospital quickly. On the other hand, knowing the date in advance means you can plan childcare more easily.

I'm in a similar position as well (but a mere babe at 34!) I had c/s last time as dd hadn't engaged, waters broke but I had no contractions and didn't dilate at all. I'm 19 weeks now and, tbh, am leaning towards an elective. I'm feeling terribly guilty about it though.

Incidentally, a friend of mine had her 2nd c/s a few weeks ago and said it was much easier than the 1st.

You're both babes.
(Me too, just a slightly older one )

Thanks, I have to admit it feels early to be making this kind of decision...I was a bit taken aback when OB said 'next appointment we discuss modes of delivery'. Yo'ure right, TF, baby might make the decision for me - or the BP might. Or, I might go into labour and if I do (and no reason not to) I'll go ahead and try - though I seriously doubt I will, given I barely had a Braxton Hicks by 39+4 last time.

ProfYaffle

Dont feel guilty! Research all the facts and then make your decision on what you feel is right for you and your baby.

Thanks Toady. I kind of feel like I should be battering down the doors demanding VBAC but as Eliboo says, the baby may decide for itself.

ProfYaffle, I feel the same - a bit guilty and a bit wistful/sad if I think of deciding on elective. But just brainstorming here is helping me separate whats realistic and sensible from feelings alone...and I think, given all circumstances, I might do best to go with a planned section. Still, not going to decide till nearer the time - I've been ill these past two weeks, might feel differently in a week or two!

tbh Eli, the more I think about it, the more I think my chances of successful VBAC are pretty slim. I'm a wuss with pain so am pretty sure I'd end up requesting an epidural and I think that, combined with my past history and the fact that they don't give that hormone to speed up contractions to women who've previously had a c/s (in Norfolk anyway) all add up. There are advantages to an elective as well.

Good luck whatever you decide.

Thanks, you too, PF. Yes, there are, pros and cons to everything....