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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Childcare in labour?

11 replies

Zaksmum · 27/09/2006 10:16

Hi
I'm about to have my second child, and am a little worried about what to do with my DS when I need to go to hospital.
My MIL is limited by train times (about an hour), and my family are the other side of London (hour away+). If I go into labour in the middle of the night and need to go to hospital, what do I do with my DS? Can he come to hospital too??
My last labour was about 36 hours, but this time I guess I may be quicker... hopefully!
Thanks :-)

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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mamado · 27/09/2006 10:23

Hi Zaksmum, I'm in exactly the same position as you and really concerned about what will happen should I suddenly be in full-on labour, and child-care [my mum] still 1 or 2 hours away. I dread the thought of having to take a taxi to hospital on my own at 4am! Also don't really want dd to see me in real pain. How old is your ds? Is he fully prepared for a sibling/you going into hospital? I've never been away from dd for even one night so am a bit concerned about that too. Also dd has got very clingy towards me recently, is it the same for you?

I hope someone can give us some advice...

lulumama · 27/09/2006 13:15

start getting friendly with neighbours now! can MIL stay with you for a few days before you are due to make sure she is there? any friends you can ask?

babysitting circle in your area? nursery nurses? have someone on standby to come in and offer to pay extra if antisocial hours - better if someone your DS knows....

ask around friends and family first , they might not know how concerned you are and offer to help....

Kelly1978 · 27/09/2006 13:23

I was in that situation, and reluctant to start asking neighbours and people I barely knew for help. Towards the end though, people were great. My ds and dd were cared for my a friend from the mother and toddler group then a neighbour for a few hours. MOst people are only too glad to help.

lorina · 27/09/2006 13:36

I agree with kelly most people would be positively honoured that you had asked them.

But if you have family that can get to you in an hour then that will probably be fine. It took my MIL an hour to get to me when I had my second one and she lives less than ten miles away!

Original poster

Zaksmum · 27/09/2006 14:26

Wow - thanks for the advice. I guess I'm just worried as my family have to rely on public transport. Of course, public transport shuts down at 11pm, and only restarts at 5am, so if I go into a quick labour starting at 11pm... then what?

But you've come up with some good ideas that I'll have to follow up. I guess I'm just a bit worried about the whole birth thing - first time was a bit of a nightmare... long labour, vomiting on gas and air, epidural didn't numb pain, DS had hand on head, umbilical cord wrapped around neck twice, so had to have emergency c-section. Lucky, as DS was 10lb3oz! I just don't need the extra worry of what to do with him this time around!

My DS is four and a half, and is vaguely understanding of what's going to happen. So at least I'll be able to explain things to him.

OP posts:

StrawberryMoon · 27/09/2006 14:36

put an ad on here and other parenting sites..i know i (as a soon to be cm) would do a one of given that i have spaces, so someone would..good luck!

Kittypickle · 27/09/2006 14:39

I was very worried by this as I became pregnant very shortly after moving to a new area away from family where I didn't know many people. I was dreading asking people and didn't need to in the end as two people volunteered to do it, even in the middle of the night, with me asking. As it happened my Mum was here when I went into labour so I didn't need to get them to help.

HRHQueenOfQuotes · 27/09/2006 14:45

I agree with the others - you'll find other local mums will probably be more than willing to help you out. We had our 'plans' all sorted for when DS1 was born.......but then the people who had said they could have him overnight weren't around when I had to go to the hospital (sods law). We called a friend from church who has 2 older children and asked if she could take him for the afternoon/evening until one of the friends who'd said they could have him got home (we knew they weren't away - just out and uncontactable). She ended up having him to stay overnight - even though we managed to contact 2 of the friends!!!

I guess we'll have to start planning where the DS's are going to go when this baby is born next may/june

shhhh · 27/09/2006 16:02

I am in a similar position BUT my parents live 20/30 mins away and il's live 10 mins away.

DH thinks that this time baby may come without giving us time to do anything iykwim.

I have had issues with il's a few months ago and don't feel 100% about them looking after dd and also dd has never been left alone in their care. They work and I am a sahm so the need has never come up. My mum doesn't work so I just assumed that when the time came she would be the best choice due to no work commitements and the fact that she has had dd x2 when we have gone for scans. Along with the fact that mum knows mine & dd's routine as she has been alone with us more than il's. Sure its only been for a few hours BUT at least dd has been alone with my mum and didn't panic. I thought maybe if il's had her then she would sense something was wrong/different as never been alone with them before iykwim.

I am suffering with pnd so leaving dd alone has been a major issue for me and it's only been since pregnant that I have left her with my mum as a last resort.So this is a major issue for me, the leaving alone bit not the babysitter bit as we have lots of offers..!

We also have a brill neighbour who would gladly sit until mum arrived or my mw suggested bring dd to hospital and mum meeting us there to take over.BTW it's easier to babysit dd at ours as we have everything here...food, highchairs,cots etc.

Another issue I had was I would rather mum see me in labour than my mil..is this only me who thinks this..??!!! Mad I know.

BTW dd has never been away from dh or I over night either...if we have gone out we have been back again within a few hours. Neither of us wants to leave her overnight so suppose the birth of ds2b will be a major challenge.Gosh why don't we think of issues like this before we got carried away 9 months ago .??

Mojomummy · 27/09/2006 17:01

didn't read all the threads...but...I went into labour at 8:20am, luckily Dh was working at home,so I threw together my hospital bag, rang my mum ( who is 70 miles away) & told her to get up ASAP & then DH drove me & Dd1 ( age 3) into hospital. I crawled into the labour ward, was pronounced 7cm & DH & DD watched the Munsters while he waited for my mum to come up.

Unfortunately, despite my mum driving on the M4 for the first time ever, DD2 arrived whilst they were watching TV ! I didn't miss my hubby in the room with me because my labour was so intense I was moo-ing & standing up bending over the bed. I was & am relieved I could be completely unselfconsious.

So, yes you can take children into the hospital & unless you have a 2.5 hour labour like me (or less!!), you should be fine.

Be prepared though & pack a bag for DS - change of undies/trousers, cartons of juice, bottle of water, comics/pens or something to keep him occupied

Hope it all goes well !

shhhh · 27/09/2006 19:12

mojo...what a god tip..!!

Note to self: Pack something for dd ..!!

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