Planned water birth ruined by a customer ..... advise needed

[Jemima1988]

ever since i got pregnant i have wanted a water birth, i think this is the most relaxing place i could possibly be and i have heard from friends that they loved it.

until

i was serving a customer at work and like most he started up a conversation about my football shaped bump, after talking a while i told him about my planned water birth. he said as a plastic surgeon he would never recommend a water birth especially for a first child, he then went on to tell me horror stories were women have ripped "from front to back" because the midwife cant see whats happening and guide the baby out with cutting, he went on to tell me a lot of the work he does is because womens bits have been stitched up badly after a water birth.

as you can imagine this freaked me out and now i have no idea what to do with 6 weeks to go i would like to have some form of plan (even if it doesnt happen that way) the idea of a little bit of choice and control soothes me

advice anyone?

Besides being shockingly unprofessional, he sounds like a weirdo to me.

Sorry if this posts twice-lost my original one!
I have researched this topic to the hilt and he is talking rubbish. Trust a man to think that a midwife has to 'deliver' your baby for it to be safe and for you not to tear! Yes you may graze/tear but there is no increased risk in a pool, in fact it could be argued that the risk is lower. Check out the 'water birth book' by Janet Balaskas for evidence based information x

Although I don't have experience of a water birth I do have experience of a 3rd degree tear which was caused by an 8lb2 baby and a very fast delivery.
I was stitched after the birth but due to swelling they stitched too tight. I had to go back about 8 months later as I couldn't have intercourse. They recut and restitched and I've had no further complications.
I would not be put off having a water birth and I'm now pg with dc2 and if possible a water birth is the way I'm going.

I think he is talking rubbish! I have had two water births, both with no tearing or stitches. One of the midwives told me that the water helps to reduce tears xx good luck

Oh and i had 9lb babies

He sounds like a prat. Sorry, but what sort of professional starts talking in the emotive terms you describe.

I have had two water births. First did have a second degree tear. But DD2 shot out like a speeding bullet. For various long-winded reasons to do with erratic labour and thinking I was just getting in the pool for half an hour to give my back a rest I had no midwife with me (planned home birth) and my body just didn't put the breaks on.

With DS my lovely mw had a big torch and very much guided me through crowning to go gently. Had a 'graze' (which is a bloody lying name if ever I heard one. It heard a damn sight more than grazing a knee! But still, was fine in a week, no stitches).

If you have any concerns at all, you can always labour in water and deliver on dry land.

There are some extra risks with a water birth and there are some decreased risks.

I was told that there can be worse tearing if you aren't controlled in your pushing as the midwife can't be hands on. Might be total tosh though as I've also been told that the cushioning of the water decreases the risk of a champagne-cork-style-crowning moment and associated tearing.

Having had the complication of a shoulder dystocia for my only pool birth I won't be allowed another one. That is a very rare and extreme problem that was not caused by the pool though just not easy for the midwife to resolve at arms length. I'd choose a pool birth every time given the chance.

Giving birth in the pool kneeling forward (as opposed to lying back or squatting) should give you the least likelihood of tearing of all options.

If a waterbirth doesn't happen for whatever reason, you can try a hot, wet compress on your perineum before delivery. And practising the idea of breathing the baby's head out, not pushing at this stage.

A routine episiotomy is far from ideal, and doctors seem particularly keep on doing unnecessarily big ones (being more focused on getting the job done rather than the recovery after). In my birth plan in the past I actually wrote that if I needed an episiotomy, I would want a midwife to do it, not a doctor.

I loved being in the water with DS1, as soon as I got in I relaxed and my contractions really sped up. It's great as you can get in to whatever position is comfortable for you and can use the gas and air (that was also amazing imo).

I am really hoping to do the same with this labour, my hospital only has one pool so just hope it's not in use when I get there!

If it is something you have wanted all along then I would go for it. The midwife at my ante natal class touched on tearing and said the important thing is to listen to them when you are pushing so they can tell you to pant/stop pushing if baby is coming too quickly. That's one of the causes of tears apparently...and not massaging your perineum, I need to get on to that one .

I had a water birth (first baby) and it was wonderful. I had some slight tearing and stitches but I would absolutely recommend it and hope to do it again. I gave birth early morning, was home that afternoon and stopped pain relief (paracetamol) within a few days. Agree with others, try to be flexible and do what feels right for you at the time. Every birth is unique, just discuss your concerns with your midwife, and please don't be put off by this ignorant man.