This has the potential to be a long one so thank you in advance. I don't know if I'm seeing things clearly so any advice would be appreciated.
Ds's birth was pretty horrible. I was having growth scans and was predicted to have a greater than 10lb baby. I was terrified and could see no way of getting such a huge baby out. I was induced at 41+3. Labour was around 12 hours in total and I had remefentanil for pain relief. When it came to the pushing stage ds showed signs of distress. The room filled with people, even though I was pretty out of it I panicked and decided I was getting out of there. I remember being shouted at by the midwife. I did try extremely hard to push ds out but I needed an episiotomy and forceps delivery. ds had low apgar scores (5@1 and 5@5). He was rushed to scbu. I didn't get to touch him but he was flashed in front of me briefly.
I was stitched up and then we were left for over an hour. I thought he was dead. I was coming down of the pain relief and it was the very worst hour of my life. A doctor came back to tell us he ds was breathing but they needed to run tests. I couldn't walk so was wheeled up to see him in the incubator before being brought back to the ward.
The next morning a doctor told me he had suspected brain damage due to oxygen starvation. They ran tests and everything came back clear. On discharge they said his problems were due to a traumatic birth. He was 9lb 6oz. he's a perfectly normal 3 yr old now. My scar didn't heal properly and I was in pain for months. After 6 months I had steroids injected under a general anaesthetic. This helped a lot. My pelvic floor isn't great and will likely need some work in the future.
I'm now 30 weeks pregnant again after 3mc. We had already decided this was our last attempt at another child.
Ds birth and the mc really effected me quite badly, I became very anxious and depressed. I found cbt to have been a great help with this.
I had hoped for a natural delivery this time but a recent growth scan and the predicted huge baby has completely thrown me. I have a meeting with the consultant this week and I don't know if I should be asking for a c section or not.
Everything I read has it as major surgery and talks about breathing issues with the baby. To me it seems a safer and more controlled option than a vb. I feel we got lucky with ds but no one can tell me what the chances of it happening again.
I know the recovery of cs varies but could it be any worse than my previous vb recovery.