Birth plan. Do you have to have one?

[Hobby2014]

I'm 30 weeks. I haven't written one yet and don't know if I need to. Did you all write one? What did you have in it?
I don't have a preference over pain relief, I'll just see how I go and ask for more if I need it.
I'm not overly against a CS, if I need it, I need it.
I don't know what positions I want to labour in or give birth in, I'll get into the position that feels right at the time.
If I need forceps or ventouse then I'll need it, is there point in writing anything about it if the baby decides what's going to happen anyway?
I don't know if I want to use the birth pool, it might not be available to use anyway.
What do I write? Do I not bother seeing as I don't feel strongly about anything. Help!

Looks like you've written it, Hobby. Good luck!

I did mine with my midwife. I said 'I don't know' A LOT.

They will ask you about the Vit K injection and the injection for the placenta delivery.

You have a great attitude IMO. Go with the flow. IME the more relaxed you are the less pain you feel. It's just hard to relax when you have a baby coming out of your fanjo.

I have had 4 DC and nobody has ever asked me for a birth plan.
I spoke with DH about what I did or didn't want incase I couldn't speak for myself but each time I was able to answer any questions and ask for things.
My only major requests were no pet headline, no episiotomy and DH to tell me the gender.

Hope all goes well.

pet headline=PETHADINE!

I never had one - just went with the flow! No harm in writing down what you have just said here

I did quite a detailed one as the whole thing appealed to the slightly anal list maker in me. Also I REALLY didn't want an epidural and I made this VERY CLEAR on my plan. A few hours into my non-progressing back to back labour they could have stuck the needle in my eye let alone my back quite frankly (luckily they restricted themselves to my back).

No one asked for mine at the hospital and no one cared when I (pre-labour) tried to hand it out.

I found it a couple of days later in my bag and DH and I had a good laugh about our naivety - not one thing, even the bit about vitamin K - had actually happened.

So I would be in the don't bother camp, with you by the look of things.

You absolutely have the right attitude - just go with the flow. As a doctor said to me when I arrived for my induction, the goal is for a healthy mother and baby to leave and how you get there is in the lap of the gods (and the health professionals) really.

Good luck and I hope all goes well too.

I did the whole NCT classes bit for information, but never made a formal birth plan. In my mind I knew what my ideal preferences were for pain relief, and I had thought about positions that might be comfortable - I talked about it with DH and so he knew what I would/wouldn't be happy with. (He translated my wild waving grunty noise at one point to mean "I think she would like gas and air with a mask as she can't do the inhale-through-the-mouth thing" which was exactly what my pain-frazzled brain was trying to make me say). And he knew I wanted to try a physiological 3rd stage (letting the cord stop beating and the placenta come away by itself) so he made sure the midwife didn't immediately cut the cord, and he knew that for DD3 he wanted to cut the cord (he was scared of doing something wrong with DD2!).

So, get informed, look at various resources for opinions (remember, eeryone has their own agenda and believes their way to be the right way) and make sure you tell whoever is likely to be with you in labour as all rational thought might leave your brain. But not to the extent that DH/DP/whoever says, "she doesn't want pain relief" when you are wild-eyed and screaming and happy to have every drug under the sun!

Good luck :)

You don't need one, but I think writing one can be useful because:
a) it gives you a chance to think through what you want and talk about it with your birth partner.
b) you can highlight anything really important (medically, support wise, whatever) that you want to make the MWs aware of.
c) some people like to have a plan because it makes them feel involved in the decision-making (it can be hard to feel really involved once you are in the middle of labour as it can all be a bit overwhelming

As many others have said, go with the flow. You know what you'd like already. The rest will just happen.

It sounds like you are being very realistic. I know someone who had hers LAMINATED and copies in her hospital bag, husband's wallet, etc. Talk about putting pressure on yourself, the midwives, etc.

Thanks everyone for your input.
I thought maybe I was being too relaxed about it all and you'd all tell me to make a bloody decision and write it down, so am glad that the way I feel is ok!
I might have a google of other peoples birth plans and see if there's anything I haven't thought of or don't know. (What's a vit k injection? Is that the same thing as the one to speed up the placenta?). As I haven't gone to and don't plan to go to any classes so don't know what I don't know, IYSWIM?
Then if there's any thing I feel strongly about or if nearer the time i feel strongly it can jot it down but to be honest I just want a healthy baby.
But thanks everyone, you have made me feel better. What will be will be !

I started one and then realised I kept saying that I just wanted what was best for the baby and then figured that so did the midwives so just left it.

I just wrote stuff down so I didn't have to answer any questions in labour and I knew hubby wouldn't have remembered what I said beforehand. It also helped to to clarify my thoughts on labour. My mw didn't really have time to read mine as I was already 6cms when I arrived and she was born 50mins later.
It was that fast she even wrote her notes about the labour on a paper towel as she didn't have time to find the page in my notes.

I think the most useful part of writing out a birth plan is discussing it with your partner and care giver. It allows you to have a conversation about how you feel. It also can include really important things to you such as if you wear glasses making sure you are given them as soon as the baby is born so you can see or in my case it include how to pronounce my name. It also allowed me the space to talk to my partner about what things i would prefer if things started to go wrong so that he knew what course of action I would want. So I would rather of had an epidural then pethidine (which can interfere with breastfeeding).
The plan isn't the important bit it's the planning if you see what I mean.

Yes, I have a birth plan. My baby will pop out when I sneeze and with the minimum of fuss

I think with your first, the most important aspect is thinking it through. Lots of "I'm not sure" is fine.

You might want to think about:

• How you feel about pethadine/diamorphine
• How you feel about high forceps (if you warn them that you want to avoid these if at all possible, it may be possible to move to a section at a slightly earlier stage)

-Do you know the sex, and if not, who do you want to be the one to tell you?

• Do you want vitamin K injection given? Vitamin K is for the baby, not to do with the placenta. Do have a google as they will ask, though obviously they can explain it to you on the day your mind may be on other things!
• If it all goes smoothly, is your preference for a natural or managed third stage?

By my second and third my plan was 2-3 pages long because there were certain things I now felt very strongly about, and I included very short summaries of my history. But that was based on previous experience of me, not stuff I could have known with no. 1.

If you have something that does need to be noted (and is in your notes) is it worth writing it separately (as MW may not have time to read them all) and carrying about with me?

I'm thinking important things like:
-Please courier Placenta to X immediately after birth (X being the lab that needs to check it due to a pre-existing condition)
-Squizita is more likely to hemorrhage or DVT due to a blood condition. Please bear in mind.

Just in case of a shift change or sudden labour in an unfamiliar hospital!

Would a laminated card or something I can just give the medics do?

I never wrote one with my first dc. But I had read up about different choices and discussed them with dh and my midwife also so I was quite clear about what my preferences were.

I didn't need to write one as it turned out, things went fine and I made decisions as I went.

Given birth 6 times. I've never had a birth plan. I found staff left me alone & intervention was minimal.

Best of luck.

I didn't write one down as such, but kept a list of the typ

Oops.

...kept a list of the typical "birth plan" type topics in mind when discussing educating because he didn't read anything himself about birth options and contingencies with DH, eg he knew I have a mortal fear of forceps, and also didn't want anyone coming near me with either pethidine or syntocin (unless I had a pph).

I have one, but I used the nhs choices one you fill out online. It's helpful to see the areas in which there are decisions to make, and we printed it out so that my husband can have it to consult on the day. It's mostly just for us to know what we want so we can tell the midwife when it all kicks off, there's no way I'd expect them to read it!

I should add that it's very much a go-with-the-flow birth plan. There's a lot of 'if possible' and 'preferably.' And I'm not ungrateful up on having a perfect experience. I'm won't be disappointed if I have an epidural or interventions.. In fact I'm going in expecting I will end up with an epidural.

I do think it's very important to know about the decisions to be made, though. Otherwise getting blindsided by them at such an emotional and hormonal time would surely be overwhelming.

I've posted this before, but this was my entire birth plan each time:

Birth partner is MrDino
He might want to cut the cord, please ask him
We don't know the baby's sex & want to find out ourselves
Want active labour as much as possible
Obviously as few interventions as possible, but whatever is needed for healthy mother and healthy baby
Syntometrine for 3rd stage is fine
IM Vit K for baby

Squizita, I would write those sorts of things separately, probably ideally on a big sticker (or a few of them!) so it can be stuck the front of the notes etc, probably in big red writing!

Thanks Dino - just imagining if I went into labour in saisbos and was sent to the nearest A&E, big stickers on my forehead lol would mean I knew everyone could see!