Anyone who has had a home birth - advice please

[mrsm22]

Hi,
I'm 36 weeks pregnant with my second baby and am planning a home birth this time. My midwife keeps changing so I haven't really got to know one this time, but it was arranged that a midwife from the home birth team would come and see me at home to discuss and arrange for me to have a home birth.

The midwife came today, but I feel thoroughly disappointed as she was really unfriendly, cold and frosty and totally unhelpful. She didn't give us any information such as things I might need for the home birth. In fact she told us she doesn't like children and seemed very put out that my little boy (only two years old ) was there playing. I felt unable to ask things because of her unfriendly manner and really the visit was a waste of time.

I was wondering if anyone who has had a home birth might be able to be a bit more helpful and advise what things I will need for the birth as in bedding and sheets or plastic sheets ? What did you use and where did you have your birth? The only thing the midwife did say was that they liked biscuits. I would be really grateful for a bit of advice or guidance on any preparation you did for the birth , things I will need and even what good or things you had in for the midwives etc.
many thanks in advance

Urg she sounds horrid - any chance of changing MW?

I'm considering a homebirth for DC2 due July. If your on Facebook there's 2 fantastic groups that help with EVERYTHING home birth related.

Ones called Homebirth UK
The other Home birth chat group

Both worth joining

U get a homebirth kit so don't worry

I bought a shower curtain to lay where I planned to give birth and had another spare for incase I decided to be somewhere else
Sanitary pads for after
Have a big duvet ready to wrap u and baby in
Old but clean towels to dry baby
Comfy clothes for u
Have baby grow/vest for baby ready unless u plan on skin to skin
Bottles if ur going to formula feed
Nappies
Pregnancy notes

I would have a hospital bag packed and by the door just in case
Good luck home birth when all goes smoothly is wonderful

Sounds awful!

I bought a shower curtain from B&Q- was £5. I laid that on sofa and an old sheet on top with some olds towels. My births are very quick & relatively tidy so I just rolled up the sheet & shower curtain into a bin bag when finished and laid out the towels & a couple of pampers bed mats (or inco pads) to sit on afterwards. Apart from those things the only other thing is a bucket for the placenta and a good light source in case you need stitches afterwards. I just bought a few packs of biscuits for the midwives- although in the end she didn't arrive until about half an hour after the birth!

They don't do homebirth kits in my area so worth checking that.

as above really. My team requested a wire coat hanger too, just in case they needed to put in a drip.

It was a great experience, my mw changed all the time too, so hopefully you'll have some nice ones attend the birth. I laboured all over the house including in bed and gave birth in the lounge. main things are shower curtain and new towel for baby to be wrapped in.

No home birth kits here either. I had a pool but other than that, a waterproof cover for wherever you plan to give birth and a couple of towels should be fine.

Have a bag packed just in case you transfer to hospital.

I had a home birth kit delivered and bought a pool. Other than that just lots of old towels. It was fab - good luck!

They must have homebirth kits of some kind but not provide them in advance, surely? Our kit isn't stuff for labour as such, it's stuff like the vitamin K, various bits of suture kit, gauze, etc. Then on the day they come with stuff like the scales and the resus equipment.

I would say you need towels, waterproof sheeting and hospital bag, plus anything for a pool.

I was told to buy a shower curtain from poundland and have old towels ready. I gave birth on the living room floor and had the shower curtain plus lots of inco pads (had a load in my homebirth pack but the mw brought some with her too). They changed the inco pads between stages of labour. After the birth, they put lots of inco pads on the sofa for me to sit on and I did skin to skin and the first bf with us both wrapped in towels, blankets and my fluffy dressing gown .

Mw brought a torch with her for doing the stitches and the placenta went straight into a yellow bag.

I am 4 days overdue and hoping for a second homebirth...today hopefully!!

I my box of goodies I have:
Towels (dark coloured old and new)
Bin bags
Shower curtain and sheets to put over sofas (where I will deliver placenta)
Tissues and kitchen roll
Bucket
Torch (or lamp for stitches)
Maternity pads and big knickers
Inco pads
Paracetamol and ibuprofen
Jug (midwife asked for this...not sure why)
Drinks and snacks
Biscuits for midwife

I also have birth pool and bags packed in case of transfer to hospital. The midwives will also need a flat surface where they can weigh the baby such as a dining room table or clear side in kitchen. The midwives have also bought round entonox and a homebirth 'kit' which has the medical stuff they need in it as penguins has mentioned above.

Good luck...it really is a great experience!

I wouldn't panic too much about your unfriendly MW, OP. There's a good chance you won't get her attending you on the day, as there'll be a team of them serving the area and you'll be sent whoever is on shift at the time.

You get at least two MWs for a home birth (the first one calls another once they've established you're in labour), so chances are one of them will be lovely even if the other is a bit grumpy. You often get a student MW as well, if you've agreed to one being present.

If you visit your GP, they can prescribe you some stronger pain killers for use after the birth if you think you might need them. I've got some in just in case, as I needed a few stitches last time and was a bit sore for a few days.

For my first I also had Pethadine prescribed to keep in the fridge at home that the MWs could inject if required (I didn't need it in the end). It needed ordering in to the pharmacy so took a few days to arrive.

However, from talking to my MW this time around it sounds like that may not be permitted around here anymore, so you'll need to check what the rules are in your area if you want Pethadine available.

[waves at Choppa] The jug is probably for adding/removing water from the birth pool to ensure it is kept at the right temperature - otherwise they make you get out!

Either that or it's replacing the request for the sieve that I received. The sieve being for removing poo/vomit/etc from the water...

Oh yes, that is a very good point. You need a clear, flat surface in any room you think you might deliver in (or as near as possible). So I had a clear dining table in case I delivered on dry land, and an area in the kitchen. The midwives will want you to put the change mat there if you have one as a soft surface whilst they do their checks.

In both areas where I have delivered, you don't get two midwifes until the last minute. The first midwife calls the second when they think delivery is imminent, not when they have established you are in labour. That must vary by area.

It's funny how areas vary isn't it? My MW was surprised at one of my antenatal appointments when she said she must give me a sieve and I said I'd already bought one as my old area said you had to get your own!

When I gave birth the second midwife arrived with the gas & air about 10 minutes before I needed to push so just in time really. I think she would have come anyway by then even if I didn't want the G&A.

They brought everything they needed with them on the day, nothing was here beforehand except the pool and associated gubbins.

Mine ( private midwives) had a list. I think it included things like a plastic bucket. Cannot remember much more but they brought all the things like plastic sheets - they later said they would bring double for future twin births as we used so much up. They brought gas and air and the tens machine.

Mine brought everything apart from waterproof sheets.
She asked for a lamp or torch so she could see properly to do any stitches with afterwards and we had plastic dust sheets and a load of towels already.
Good luck, it was such a lovely experience to have our youngest at home!

Oops. Meant to say I gave birth in the pool in the kitchen and transfered to the sofa afterwards where the midwife stitched me. I never needed too

Really sorry to hear that your midwife was so 'off' today. My only advice on preparation is to accept that she may end up attending and think how you will cope with her input....or lack of it as the case may be!

I saw only 2 really lovely midwives throughout antenatal care and wasn't prepared for the misogynistic harridan that turned up at crunch time...think loud sighs, tutting and rolling her eyes at my husband when I had particularly painful contractions. I took the opportunity to escape when she left to get more gas and air and made DH take me in to hospital where I gave birth just over an hour later.

In retrospect, I wish I had just tuned her out and got on with the job in hand. She ruined the experience but we shouldn't have let her... I put it down to first labour and not knowing what to expect.

In terms of 'kit', we hired a birthing pool that was invaluable during labour, but towards the end I felt very hot in it and wanted out. Only problem was, I had planned that the pool would contain all the 'mess' and hadn't really planned for an alternative....

Before active labour, but after waters broken, I found all I needed was absorbent pads. I used a tens machine to good effect for a few hours but not the exercise ball - found I had no real use for it.

Midwife brought G&A but don't know what else she might have produced if I'd let her near me for the actual birth.

Thank you to everyone who has responded, that's been very helpful. I rang the delivery suite today and was told that they do bring incontinence sheets with them. I'm going to try find a plastic fitted sheet for the bed. Does anyone know where sells those? A chemist or Mothercare maybe? Thanks again.

You can get plastic fitted sheets in eBay! Other than what ppl have said I would suggest a tens machine (you can rent) - I was amazed by what a difference it made, esp when the gas and air didn't arrive for a while. And an old duvet - much more comfy to lie on than just pads on the floor if you think that's where you might deliver the baby or placenta. Midwives loved it too as they could roll it up at one end to prop me up etc. I didn't really bleed at all so it was fine to keep after a turn in the washing machine.