4th degree tear with infection

[sunshinereggae]

Hello mums,

I am a new mom who lives in Finland and had vaginal birth on 12th March. It was a long and difficult labor and full of interventions cos it's overdue. I got my water broke, induced, epiosotomy and vacuumed. I got stitches right after the labour and then they stitched more on the next day at the surgery room due to bad damages. I was bleeding so I got blood transfusion.The doctor told me that if I wish to have the second baby it supposed to be C section. The baby is healthy and gorgeous. I stayed at the hospital for 5 days. The doctor and midwives came to see me before I left but they did not explain to me how I need to care the wounds and stitches. Nobody did that. Until a week after I got a check up with my midwife who monitored my pregnancy, she said, I should shower more but she did not tell in details. So I did what she said, to have shower more often like 4 times a day. Then, in the next appointment, she checked my wound and told me that there was something wrong cos the wounds were still open so she referred me to see the doctor. Long story short, I got infection on my wound. Until now, I have been under antibiotics for a month. I am really stress about this and the pain is still killing me especially when I go no.2, so laxative is very helpful. I am still taking pain killers so that it enables me to do some activities. I have read more about 3&4 degree tear from internet. I also learnt much from mumsnet about it. Now I have been practicing also kegel exercise and bought Tea tree oil, and do expose the wound to air otherwise I know nothing only taking shower, which I always do. I take shower esp to V area 3/4 times a day and change my pad whenever I go to toilet. I do not blame on anything, but just feel regret that I should have known how to handle it at very first time. It was very overwhelming situation that I got 4th degree tear and there was no info or a warning that I need to handle it properly. I feel I had lack of info. No doubt that Finnish health system is one of the best, and I am thankful for that, but, I feel that there was miscommunication on the process. Maybe because I am not a Finn and not a Finnish speaker either. Sorry to take your time reading this, but anyone who has similar experience or if you have any comments, feel free.

That sounds absolutely terrible. You poor thing. I has much more minor tearing but was given extensive advice on wound care. I was told to use frozen peas wrapped in a very clean hankie to help with swelling in the first day or two. I was also recommended mixing lavender oil with a little milk and adding it into a warm bath to soothe the stitches. Congratulations on your baby.

Congratulations on your new baby. I'm sorry to hear about your tear and problems healing, it sounds dreadful.

I had something similar happen and I just wanted to say that you shouldn't hesitate to seek the medical care that you feel you need. I had to push for proper care, I think that unless you complain/ask everyone just assumes it's fine. Don't worry about going back to the doctors if it still hurts, or if you just want a check. I also took laxatives (Lactulose in my case) for 3 months.

Finally, it took me a long time to recover mentally (longer than it took physically) so don't feel that you need to spring back into feeling ok/perfectly happy. You have had a tough time and you should take the time you need to process this. Hope that things improve for you soon, and congratulations again on the baby.

Hi NickyEds and FromagePlease
Thanks for your thought and recommendation. sorry for so delay response. I was in still bad feelings, not much difference. On Monday, I had a check up with a surgeon. He examined me and turned out that I am having fistula. That's why my infection is still going on because the poo particle drains to my perineum area. Yeap, more bad news eh? this is gotta be the worst summer ever. However, the baby is just healthy and adorable, at least that makes me still feel grateful.

Congratulations, how lovely that your baby is happy and healthy :)

I'm so sorry that you have been so unwell. I had a third degree tear and felt very shocked and unprepared for it like you. It sounds like you've had such an awful time and maybe when the pain and infections settle down, get some counselling. I read a really helpful article on MN yesterday about how it's ok to talk about your pain and that your birth experience is as important as having a healthy baby, I will find the link and post it for you as I found it really helpful and reassuring.

In terms of pain I found sprinkling some salt into the bath along with tea tree oil has really helped and pouring distilled witch hazel on pads then putting them in the freezer for a couple of hours. Also grapes and kiwi to keep the bowels moving ;)

Sounds to me like your emotional pain is as much as your physical pain so maybe talk to your doctor about that.

Take care and don't be ashamed to talk about what has happened to you. Your experience is important and you have every right to feel emotional about it. Xxx

Hi mummycherry2,
Thanks for stopping by n responding my post :)
thanks also for your advises. How long did it take you to heal? Happy that you had much better recovery process than mine.
Well, i had been consult to some GP n ob/gyn at the hospital. Uhm,they dont talk much, somehow, Finns dont talk much,tho. Some docs even only said 'just be patient'. I think i was patient enuf and required more checking. So they made me appointment to a surgeon earlier (before it was scheduled on august) as I requested who then stated that I have a fistula.
Ah well, hopefully everything gets better.

Hi OP Sorry your recovery is going so slowly- really do keep on at the health care professionals to get your infection cleared up. I agree with Mummycherry2- maybe some counselling would be useful. I was offered some at my 8 weeks check because I was still having some nightmares about my son's birth(I didn't in the end I could feel it getting easier and I'd fully healed) but it was nice to be offered.
Glad your baby's doing so well

I'm still not healed either sunshine, I had DS almost 4 weeks ago and have not come off the antibiotics yet...the pain is manageable now though and I'm hopeful that things are starting to heal. My GP said it would be at least another month or so yet though so I totally know how you are feeling :(
Over here, you can do something called birth reflections where you can talk about your birth with a trained midwife and discuss what happened and why to give you clearance. I am going to do it but it's still too raw at the moment! It might be worth asking if something like that would be possible ? They can only say no...
How is the pain?

Hi Nicky,
I'll try to find the counselling. I think they offer some consultations but I dont have any idea if they have it in English, and again, this whole situation might have been happened because of miscommunication. There're some info that I missed because I'm a foreigner; can be a language barrier somehow or the culture This makes me a bit skeptical. Maybe I am just being silly, but thats the way it is. Well, now I am going to make appointment with private ob/gyn just want to have other opinion. My husband, who is a Finn, kept telling me that the public hospital offers really good quality health care. Well, they do have good health care system and mostly free or very cheap cos of the insurance, but apparently, in my case -after labor- I disagree with him. I demand a doctor who listens and being care, not only just doing their jobs done. A doctor even was confused about yellowish discharge from my perineum -that time I already knew it was because of the infection-
And I am very unsatisfied when listening to doctor's explanation by one word or 2 words if I am lucky. Yeah, just being ironic :p but they dont talk much, for sure.

Hang in there mummycherry
I am sure, you'll get better soon. It takes time, yes, but you are getting there.
Oh, pain killer and laxatives are still my best friend. It is still pain if I dont take pain killer; difficult to sit and walk. And after having no.2 a.k.a pooping (mind the word), it's so so painful. I think that's because of the poo particle leaks onto the perineum wound. Antibiotics help to ease the pain a bit. Hopefully this time the infection will just go away.

Will try to find the birth reflections, never heard bout it before.

Btw, how did you end up with the 3rd degree? was it because of the baby's size?

Yes I was going to say to you, while you still have infection , don't try to do too much-I've learnt that the hard way already!
I'm not entirely sure but like you , my labour was interfered with when they tried to artificially break my waters. After that everything went downhill. I was in birthing pool, them taken out and water breaking attempted -twice Nd failed as baby was too close to delivery. I demanded an epidural then but DS came too quickly for if to kick in! My third stage lasted 7 minutes and he came out within about 5 pushes. The midwife who delivered said I got the tear because he came so quickly at the end he didn't turn his shoulders after his head came out ... I don't really know more than that which is why I'm going to go to birth reflections.
Try having a quick shower off after a number 2 to keep things feeling clean down there and to avoid further infection xx

Sorry took long time to reply, mummycherry2, been swamped, like always. Wow you had a super fast labour! Lucky you. Well epidural surely helps for easing the pain but the effect after the epidural goes off, you'll get backpain sensations. I also got probs with the baby's shoulder at the end. Yeah, i do shower after no.1 and no.2. I often do long shower after no.2 and dry if after. Oh i use lots of tissue n pads, Im so not environmental friendly at the moment, sorry to the nature. Lol. Hows your condition now?