Third Degree Tear

[Frizz1986]

Hi everyone,

I gave birth on Xmas eve at 37+4 to a healthy 6lb 5oz baby (my first baby)
I had what i thought were braxton hicks contractions for the few days prior that really kicked off overnight (but still irregular)
At 9am my waters went, at 10:10am i was at the birth centre already at 6cm and at 10:49am my little one arrived.

She was a small baby, but i ended up with a 3rd degree tear (a 3b tear) I assume this was because the labour was so fast so my body didn't have time to stretch effectively.

Anyway, i am a little disappointed with myself as she wasn't big enough to tear me so i feel its my fault.
Anyone else felt this?

Also any advice on how to get things healing nicely. I am only dabbing after the toilet as its sore after surgery on xmas eve afternoon, but obviously there is still leakage and i want to make sure things are clean.
I am trying to do a few pelvic floors each day (how many would people recommend and how long should i hold for)

Also how long until my first bowel movement? Am taking lactulose along with other painkillers/antibiotics but am nervous about the first one. Its only been 48hrs, and don't feel constipated yet but not sure at what point i should be concerned.

Poor you! I had a third degree tear with my first and was gutted too as she was tiny, less than 6 pounds, but tear was caused by forceps delivery. I was advised to bath twice a day and use lavander oil in the water as it helps with healing. Can't remember how long it was before first bowel movement but not long and it was not painful. I did the pelvic floor exercises three times a day religiously. It was not a pleasant experience but thanks to the painkillers I was never in excruciating pain afterwards, just felt swollen and bruised, and everything healed ok. All the best and congratulations for your new baby x

I had a 3a tear with my first daughter she was 8lb 3oz born ten days late. All I'll suggest is being scrupulously clean. My consultant told me to use the shower head after each bowel movement which if anything was also very refreshing. Keep on top of painkillers even if you don't feel you need them. Lactulose is your friend. And pelvic floor exercises yes very important but you're only 2 days post op. You'll still be very swollen so give yourself a good rest period first.

congrats on your xmas baby!

I hear you, I also had a 3b tear two months ago, and I'm also feeling a bit disappointed with myself - I had an epidural and couldn't move around too much, and I'm telling myself that maybe if I'd put up with the contractions (for 40 hours...), I wouldn't have needed forceps and the tear wouldn't have happened.

A 3b tear is not good, and you have all my sympathy. Just remember that it will get better and you will be (almost) as good as new - took maybe 5 weeks for me to stop being in pain, and 7 weeks to feel back to normal.

My advice: hop in the shower after every bowel movement to clean things up, at first I didn't and it got infected, not nice. And lavender oil baths are really great to soothe and help the healing process along.

I would start really slow with the pelvic floor exercises, as long as the wound is still fresh. There will be plenty of time to start them once you're not in pain anymore.

The worst thing for me by far was going to the bathroom for number 2, it was excruciating and scary as I felt my stitches were ripping open every time (was assured no such thing would happen, though).

I had my first bowel movement the day after the birth, a bunch of them in fact as they basically fed me laxatives at the hospital. Then once I came back home I got constipated, and that was really horrible. Made everything so much worse. My most important piece of advice would be, do NOT get constipated! Lactulose didn't do much for me, so my GP gave me a strong-ish laxative, it made all the difference in the world. With a new baby and stitches in your lady parts, the last thing you need is to be terrified to go to the bathroom.

Good luck with everything, and again - it does get better! Enjoy your little one :-)

Congratulations and well done ! 3b tear here. Laid off pelvic floor for a while but started again after a few days; used a sports water bottle to kind of 'dribble' water onto my fanjo post-wee to stop it stinging; poo after 48 hours - held a wad of tissues on my undercarriage while i was going. Knew it wouldn't do anything but somehow made me feel secure - pooing didn't hurt at all. Showered after each poo but avoided using soaps for a while as per nurses instructions. Didn't feel disappointed but was gutted - took me a while to get over it and going to birth stories really helped me.

I didn't look at my fanjo fir weeks snd weeks and really worried about how it would look. Wish I had as I would have felt a lot better.

I was automatically referred for fanjo physio with a lovely lady. Highly recommend this. Still religiously do pelvic floor exercises.

Finally, you've done nothing wrong. Birth is a thing no one can control (I think) and having a tear does not mean you failed at all.

When you get back on the horse with your OH, lube is your friend, at least for a while while you get your confidence back xxx

Thanks everyone for your help.
Had my first bowel movement this afternoon and it was ok. The lactulose definitely helped so will make sure i continue with that along with my other meds.
I realised after I left hospital that no one really told me how to care for the wound and what to expect other than it would take a while to heal.
And in my haste to get home I forgot to ask.
I will use a shower on the area as advised as I would like to keep it clean and avoid infection. I know its hard as there is other general womb leakage so trying to monitor that too, but hopefully will feel fresher with a rinse.

My first baby was 9lb 12, delivered with forceps. I had a third degree tear. The best bit of advice I was given was by the NCT. Wash with water after going to the loo, and then use the hair dryer on your stitches, on the lowest coolest setting. It was fantastic. Stopped it feeling sore and it healed very quickly.

do call your post-natal ward for wound care advice and your MW visit in a couple of days is also an opp to get it checked (she'll want to check stitches) and ask for advice x

Firstly congratulations!!!!! My 6lb er gave me a 3 rd degree tear too so please don't feel it's you! The main benefit I found was that because of the 3rd degree tear I had NO pain on bowel movement at all - nerves were in shock! It heals quickly, I was advised honey on a sanitary towel (as it is a natural antiseptic) if you can bear the stickiness.....

Ps 10 years on and all is well!

Another good tip is to let your fanjo dry naturally or with a hair dryer (on low heat) after washing x

I had a third degree tear after a forceps delivery. I was pushing for 3 hours and think I'd still be there without the forceps. She's now 24!

I was convinced it was my fault that I needed forceps and was told it was face presentation, so there wasn't any way she could come out naturally. I found it really helped to know afterwards what had happened.

My friend is a midwife and says you can ask to have the birth explained to you as mis-remembering is one of the biggest causes of PND. It might be a good idea to ask for this?

Thanks.
I think i shall go through it with my hubby to give me some perspective and also ask about going through it with the midwife. I was not aware that was available.
I know that it really doesn't matter as baby has arrived safe and well but i guess everyone wants the perfect delivery and wonders if they could have done something to make it better.

Sounds familiar Imperial (except DS is 3 on Saturday)!

I'd also add try to air the stitches- after a few days I found lochia a lot less so I put one of those waterproof mats on the bed and wore an old nightie and slept like that- no knickers or pad- so that air could get to everything, or mw suggested laying like that for a bit during the day if possible. Don't try to do too much too fast, let everything heal up a bit- walking was an issue for me for a while, but I'd also had PGP so it was probably a combination.

It will get better. I had PTSD and PND and it took me a long time to feel 'normal', but you get there :) Wishing you a good recovery and congrats on your daughter

Congrats!

Sorry you feel it was your fault/within your control. Going through your notes at the hosp with a MW might help give you closure.

I had 3rd degree too. As others have said rinse with water. Drink lots of water to keep your poos soft. And I read online not to look "down there" with a mirror so I haven't

My midwife suggested pelvic floors when feeding the baby as a easy way to remember.

I found that the MW didn't seem keen to review my stiches beyond the home visit. So I asked the Dr at the 6 week check to look. I also had a follow up at the hosp too, I think there clenched my bottom too tight during the exam as I then had a fisture - so try not to do that if you are examined.

Think I felt back to normal after a few months. It shouldn't have any bearing on future babies either.

Enjoy your baby and hope you aren't to uncomfortable.

I had a 3b tear with my first baby 3 years ago. She was 7lb 3oz born but I had a fast labour too. I'd agree with the others who advise using lavender oil in the bath but I also used tea tree oil and bathed daily. I became constipated once home from hospital and found that I needed an alternative laxative as lactulose gave me awful wind pains (GP gave me movicol which was great).
I couldn't do pelvic floor exercises initially as I had no feeling down there but then started doing them very regularly when able and they did help. It took me quite a long time to feel normal again but am fine now and had no problems with incontinence etc. whilst pregnant this year with my second child. Congratulations on the new baby.

I had a third degree tear and then found out prolapse too. Baby was back to back. My physio has me doing the following pelvic exercises 4 times per day. Contract both front and back 10 times quick, then 10 times for 10 seconds each then contract and hold but try to contract even harder 5 times quick to fully exhaust the muscle. You should do it for at least six months and then can go fewer times a day if it's worked but make sure you get properly checked down there before exercising again. My GP missed everything.

Congratulations on the birth of your daughter!!
Sorry to hear about your tear. I also tore badly, 3rd or 4th degree, I duno but I was in theatre straight after.
Keep taking the lactulose, it really helped me and the first poo (and subsequent) weren't scary. It's once I'd finished taking it that I had to take a bit more care. Decided to buy another bottle oft heated because I was still such a mess down there and hada referral to a physio. She said you have to make sure your poo is soft while you are healing. So drink plenty of water. It will help.

Exercises down there are good but songstress it for about a week. You're going to be really swollen so let yourself rest and settle before getting to work.

Let the disappointment slip away. You have your baby girl now. Just focus on her and healing x

So many typos, sorry!

Tonnes of water. Mix up tee tree oil and lavender in some ky jelly and put it in stitches. Tee tree and lavender in the bath. Witch hazel on pad too.

Congrats :)