Can someone tell me a bit more about being able to "control contractions" with subsequent babies?

[Fakebook]

I've read numerous times about some women being able to control their contractions with subsequent babies.

If anyone has experienced this, what does it feel like? How do you control them? Do you control the pain or their frequency?

I'm just intrigued.

I've never heard that expression, but in the very early stages watching your breathing does help getting through the pain.

the one thing I got "better at" was the "panting" phase just as the head is about to be born.

with my last two I really listened when they said "stop pushing" and the push-stop-push-stop-push made me feel completely in control.

I still tore with DS5, but needed no stitches with DD, which helped me recover really fast.

is that what you meant?

(I had epidural with 4 of them though - DS1 was forceps, but with DS2, DS5 and DD the drugs wore off in time to push which was really good.
I had nothing at all with DS3 as he came really fast (30 mins from entering the hospital!) and ELSC with DS4.)

I don't think you can control the contractions per se, but you can definitely control your response to them better

I beg to differ in that I do believe you can sometimes control through sheer will as I did when pushing out my 2nd child. I was exhausted and had hit the wall so to speak so I refused point blank to push anymore and actually felt like I was suppressing my contractions until the midwives agreed to give me some assistance with the suction cup I then restarted them! Very bizarre and I don't think I could have stopped the contractions leading up that point but I felt strangely in control of the pushing contractions!

Interesting replies!

Zing, tbh I don't know what I meant. I only have one experience of proper labour as I had an epidural with dd so never experienced childbirth the first time. I felt a bit lost pushing the second time. But I couldn't stop or control my contractions during the second stage. they just carried on coming but were really irregular which confused the midwives aswell.

Breastmilksonme, that's really weird. The only time my contractions have stopped mid way was with dd in early labour during my induction, I switched the TENS machine on too high and got a jolt of electricity and it stopped the contraction dead as it was peaking.

I suppose it does make sense being able to control the pushing stage somewhat as its you doing something rather than just the contractions.

I assumed that there are women out there who can choose the frequency of their contractions! Maybe it doesn't work like that!

@ I don't know what I meant

sorry....

the weirdest thing was when I was fully dilated with DD and was told to push all my pain suddenly went away.

I panicked. I told the MW that I've changed mind and I want a C-section instead.
everyone in the room was
it was like a personality change.
and because I had absolutely no pain I kind of felt lost, not knowing what to do!
I was refusing to try and push. it was utterly bizarre.
I ended up giving it a go because I thought the MW would slap me.

you just need to wait for a contraction and push while it lasts.
I had the baby monitored so when I couldn't feel the contraction I asked the MW to tell me I was having one. it worked well.

Proper panic can definitely stop contractions - imagine an antelope giving birth and suddenly being set upon by a lion. Contractions stop to allow the antelope to run away.

No idea what controlling them would really mean...

Had my third baby yesterday and had very irregular contractions for most of my labour until I realised they slowed/stopped if I sat/laid down and started as soon as I stood up! I then stayed on my feet and contractions became a minute apart, I dilated very quickly and he was born in less than an hour. Again, not sure if that's what you mean by controlling contractions but I think they can sometimes be positional...

Yes! that happened to me too Zing the second time. At the pushing stage the pain disappeared, just this immense urge to push came over me, and I was told to push by the midwife. I did it once and it felt like my vagina was about to burst so I didn't push with the next contraction and was screaming it hurt. The midwife got me by the shoulders and told me that I had to push or it would hurt for longer (or something like that! Can't remember) but it worked and I started pushing again.

Are you still suppose to feel pain with every contraction when you get to pushing? . I thought it was normal not to!

I wonder if that was controlling the contraction by not pushing?

Lady

true but for me it was other way round.
All pain stopped. that made me panic.

Zing Your describing transition.

I've given birth 5 times. Gas & air for about an hour with first 3dc. Nothing with dc4 & 5.

I truly believe I can control my perception of pain. Fear causes panic. With all my dc I delivered within maximum of 2 hours of arrival at the hospital or birth center. Every single time mw were shocked by how dilated I was.

Your mind is the most powerful part of you...honest!!!

How do you do that Shellywelly? I'm having moderately painful contractions right now. How do I change my perception of pain? Really interested to know. I'm not really that scared this time, is that a good start?

shelly

I need your address and phone details now.
if I have another one you are my birthing partner.
I'm not even asking. I'm telling you.
I'll pay you in

Lol.

With dc 2& 3 I was terrified...literally!

When I was pregnant with dc 4 I learnt about hypnotherapy/ hypnobirthing/ mindfulness. Basically I keep moving & swaying during contractions. In my mind I 'talk' to myself through each contraction. I do my best not to get absorbed in the contraction & concentrate on something else...one of my labours it was a lovely smelling towel, which I rubbed & sniffed!

I sound mad but its basically keeping control but not fighting my body...don't know im explaining this propley!

I've only been at one birth...23 years ago! Well apart from my own dc's births!

Fakebook - its great your not scared.

With all my labours I ignored being in labour for as long as possible... I went shopping & picked ds1 up when I was in labour with dc4.

But in saying all that I had a mw appointment yesterday &became really scared when she said I don't meet the criteria for the MLU so I will have to deliver on labour ward...my heart was beating so fast, I started sweating & wanted to leave the appointment.

Im organising a homebirth...I don't care what dp or the dc say!

I found I could control contractions with my third. I had an epidural, but it started to wear off and I was very uncomfortable. I wanted a top-up but was told it was too late, baby ready to be delivered etc. I thought "fuck this, I didn't have all that aggravation and a bloody great needle in my back to be told I can't have any more just when things are getting interesting", so I just stopped dead - no more contractions. Midwife and I had a stand-off, her looking smug, then bewildered, and finally she gave in. Had the top-up, got comfortable then set off again. I wasn't in masses of pain or upset, so no obvious trigger for labour stopping - I remain convinced that I did it through sheer will power!

Thanks Shelly, that's what I'm doing more or less this time with the carrying on. I'm not experiencing true labour yet so will see if I can ignore it for as long as possible! You do sound like an expert, will this be your 6th baby?

That's interesting about the cervix closing through fear fuckwittery, I think that's what happened to me with my first, as I was induced and didn't have time to prepare with the breathing as there was no gradual build up. That was my longest labour. The second time the pain built up over a day and I felt slightly more in control.

That's amazing clobbered. Were you at the pushing stage then? When my epidural wore off with dc1 I just had this intense pain in the bum and I couldn't cope. The midwife topped me up without asking. I was actually asleep during the contractions until they saw I was dilated enough to push!

I have no first hand experience in this but a friend of mine (who is a little bit alternative in her thinking!) recommended that I read Inna May's Guide to Childbirth. It is a very very interesting read and has opened my eyes as to how different everyone is and how remarkable our bodies are.

Only about half way through it, but yes, I do think after reading the stories that are in it that some women are able to control contractions. Hell, there are even some stories about women who have been 8cm dilated and then gone back to 4cm.

Probably not for everyone but I personally thought it was a great read, especially for someone like me who doesn't have a clue

I experienced this with dc2. I was forced to transfer in from a home birth without DH due to the midwives being rather clueless. I'd been having good contractions every 3 mins but while I was waiting for DH to be able to get dc1 to nursery and come in- this was 5am so I had a long wait- I laid on the floor in the toilet in yoga Child position as still as I could so I could get the light to go off and retreated into the only private womb like space I could. I kept repeating to myself 'not yet baby, it's not safe yet' and my contractions slowed and weakened (and the even more clueless hospital midwives twatted about outside). When DH walked jn I had three overwhelmingly powerful ones one after another. I needed to feel safe and I think labour would've stopped altogether if DH hasn't turned up when he did.