Really scared of labour second time round.

[Threeree]

I'm very early pregnant with second baby and while it was very much planned I'm petrified of going through labour again.

With my DS my waters broke at 39+3 but I didn't have DS for another 2 days. On the day of his birth I went to delivery ward around 8am, but things slowed up, to cut a long story short I had 2 failed epidurals (wore off on one side only) syntocin drip, every time I sat up I vomited (filled about 20 cardboard dishes) ended up with vacuum, stirrups and Ds was eventually delivered with the help of forceps after 10 hours of constant pain, and 7 people standing looking up my fanjo!!

I had absolutely no break in contractions when they got really bad so it was just one long contraction for about 4 hours.

I'm clinging onto the hope that it can't be that bad the second time round, - a doctor did mention after reading my notes that I obviously had a traumatic birth experience. I can't figure out if it really was, as when I talk to anyone about their labour everyone says theirs was horrific too. So don't really know whether I'm just a wimp or whether this is par for the course?

If I thought this was a one off, and most labours are not this bad it would help ease my fears I think, and I hear second births are supposed to be easier too.

My first birth was horrific, DD almost died due to foetal distress and I had the drip, vontuesse delivery and no pain relief (long story).

I was very frightened second time round. But my second birth was lovely, three hours from my waters being broken (induced early due to obstetric choleostasis) to my lovely boy appearing. No pain relief through choice this time and only a small graze.

Try not to worry- horrific first birth doesn't equal the same second time around. Congratulations!

Same here - hideous first with stirrups, emergency paeds 3 rd degree tear badly stitched etc but second was 3 hours and just a graze! I found talking to my midwife about first birth and having some counselling really helped. It doesn't matter hot it compares to other people's experiences - if it was traumatic for you then it was traumatic. Second births seem to be very different but don't be worried all pregnancy - ask for some reassurance from midwife. Some people on here have mentioned Birth Trauma charity as helpful (sorry cant remember exactly but maybe someone will be along with proper name!)

Three

if you felt it was traumatic for you, it was traumatic for you.
The Birth Trauma charity recognises that even a so called easy labour may be very traumatic for the individual involved.

It is not for anyone else to say what is and is not traumatic for you.

I felt the same as you in the early days of my second prg. First time round I was naive and only relied on what my MW and birth classes told me. Second time round - I was tooled up!

I did lots and lots of research and in the end I had a c section. It was the right decison for me.

Do not panic, there are lots of options open to you, hypno birthing, talking to someone about the birth, going through your notes in great detail and someone explaining what happened may help, home births and of course an ELC.

Thanks ladies, and you are totally right Rose if I felt it was traumatic it was.

I guess I just wanted to know was it a pretty common experience. I know that no two births are the same but if I thought it was was just a particularly bad one, then I would feel a bit more optimistic that I couldn't have two really bad births - although with my luck.........

I had a similar experience to the first two posters. 1st birth was awful & took months to recover from, 2nd was a dream. It was a genuinely amazing experience. Good luck!