Friend's brand new baby in critical care

[thundernlightning]

I'm sorry if this is the wrong place for this. Got a text at 3 saying she'd had a c-section, then another at 5 saying the baby was not doing well. I know I can't do anything but I'm handholding with her and her husband over text. I want to help but I don't know what I can do. Has anyone any advice?

Your poor friend :( My DS was in NICU after birth, he was taken in the middle if the night after DP had gone home. I texted two friends out of desperation as I felt so alone and forlorn.

To be honest I didn't want anything from them except a listening ear when I was ready (but i an a very private person). I would suggest just keep an eye on your phone and she will tell you if and when she needs anything.
I hope the baby will be ok x

Thanks for the response. I will be glued to my phone. Things seem to be improving - the drs say she's not likely to die today but what an awful situation. I hope your DS was all right.

Oh, I hope they're ok. Just let them know you are there, even if it's the middle of night if they need to talk.

Sending love xxx

Oh your poor friend, sorry to hear she is having such a rough time. As pp said, there's not much you can do but be there to listen at the end of the phone if she needs anything, I'm sure knowing that you care will be reassuring to your friend

Thank you Thunder he is absolutely fine now. You are a good friend x

Yes, just listen to her. One of the things I found hardest when DD was in NICU/SCBU were friends who didn't really think much of it. One even asked me why I hadn't discharged myself and gone home instead of drawing out my stay in hospital as long as possible!

And when her baby hopefully gets better, offer to help out as much as possible while they visit the hospital, making meals, doing the shopping etc., anything to make their life easier while they spend time with their DD.

Thanks everyone!

After a terrifying morning (we're in Canada), she texted to say the doctors now expect her little one to live. There will be a few weeks in the NICU, but that's far better than we all thought it was going to be. Nothing on long-term effects. Still, she sounds much more like herself again, and her mum tells me she's had something to eat.

Thank you for the advice and the kindness. I'll be sending a care package to them this afternoon, and keep my phone in my pocket, just in case.

You sound lovely!

I hope your friends lo makes a speedy recovery and they can all be at home together soon.

Thank you for the excellent suggestions. She's asked for soap, I'll put hand cream in the bag too.

LO has turned a corner. EEG and EKG both good and I've heard that the doctors are going to try to get her off one of the machines. My friend may be able to hold her baby soon! and her husband said he actually slept last night!

Fantastic!