Struggling to cope with a crash section

[SneezySnatcher]

Hello. I am writing this at the suggestion of other posters. Just looking for advice/reassurance I suppose.

My waters broke at 9am on Friday 12th April (40+6)I was given a time for induction the next day and went home. Labour started that evening and by 1am I was getting strong contractions every 3 minutes. The hospital is twenty five minutes away and, as my first labour had progressed well, I decided to head in. When I got there the MW checked me and said I wasn't in labour or dilated at all (I'd been checked at an appointment that week and was told I was 3cm). I was very disappointed but went home, despite the pain.

When I got home the pains were constant and agonising but because I 'wasn't in labour' I stayed home. I called the MW who said to try and stay home until my induction appointment at 10am (eight hours away). Eventually, after truly wanting to die, I went in at 8am to be examined and told I was at 5cm. Luckily there was a shift change and I got a different MW who gave me G&A and let me in the pool. This really helped deal with the pain.

Everything was going brilliantly until around 10.20 when my MW told me to get out of the pool immediately as there was a lot of blood. A quick examination showed a placental abruption and from there it was total chaos. I had several people working on me at once putting in canulas, giving me anti-emetics, pulling off my wet clothes.

I was convinced DS and I were going to die so
I said goodbye to my DH and was taken to theatre and put to sleep.

When I woke up I was told DS was fine but in NICU as he didn't breathe for 3 minutes. I was given a blood transfusion as I'd lost 1.5litres of blood. Luckily we are both fine now but I feel completely traumatised. It was only reading a thread today I realised I had a wound which would need caring for

I keep going over things in my head:
What if I hadn't gone in until ten as the first MW suggested? I'd not have even been seen for a while but my section happened at 10.25.

Were the constant contractions and pain a warning that things weren't right (I managed well with DD's birth so I knew what to expect). Should I have stood my ground rather than go home?

The consultant said its very rare to have an abruption after a straightforward first birth and with no complications - so why did it happen?

I was told another minute and we both could have died - I'd have left DD with no mummy.

I was also completely unprepared for a section so I feel really clueless about aftercare etc. nobody has checked my wound or told me what to do/not to do.

I'm not really sure what I'm asking but I needed to get it down. I am so impressed with the doctors and MWs who saved us but I'm struggling to cope.

I'm also feeling very guilty about DD (just 3) who is being passed around relatives while I'm in the hospital (this is night 3) and DH is helping me out. I'd really hoped for as relaxed a transition as possible.

So sorry to hear of your experience.

I had a similar experience a few years ago.

I had a DS whos labour was straight forward and no problems, i was induced with him as he was 2 weeks late.

With my next baby i was 35wks pregnant when i noticed i hadn't felt her move. I went to the hospital and found out she had died.
I was induced the following evening.
The labour was the most horrendous, painful experience i've ever had. The pain, my god was like nothing i've ever felt. I was crying and begging them for an epidural and for a c-section. Needless to say i didn't get the c-section and was left for hours in horrendous pain before they gave me an epidural.
When my daughter was born thats when they discovered i'd had a concealed abruption. So i had no bleeding or pain to indicate that something was wrong.

I got pregnant about 5 months later with another girl.
I was told i'd be induced at 38wks as there is an increased risk of another abruption the nearer i got to 40wks.
I was admitted and induced at 37+5, all was going well.... the midwife even asked if i 'knew what labour felt like' as i was dealing with the contractions really well. I got to about 5 or 6cms without any problems and wasn't moaning about the pain at all.
Then a midwife came to see me and wanted to check on me.... as i stood up a massive clot came out.
I was rushed from the ward to the labour ward..... the room was packed with so many people working on me, blood was pouring out, i was having by them a constant contraction, shaking uncontrollably and very unwell.
I was rushed for a c-section and was put to sleep.
I woke up about 7 hours later and told my dd was fine..... that was all i cared about.
I was in hdu for 4 days and was very ill, i had 11 units of blood and 2 or 3 units of ffp, fluid on my lungs.... and other problems.

I was finally told that i'd had another abruption....it didn't occur to me what was going on when it was all happening as i was just worried about my daughter.
Despite being very close to dying i felt incredibly lucky to have bled out as this was the warning sign that saved my daughter....the warning sign i didn't get with my first daughter.

I didn't get any counselling or advise or anything. Infact i was more traumatised with the labour i had with my stillborn daughter because obviously she was stillborn but also because the pain was out of this world.... ive also had a ruptured ectopic and that pain doesn't even come close to that labour.

Anyway..... i guess i was just incredibly unlucky to have had 2 severe abruptions. It is very rare to have 2 abruptions like i have esp as severe as mine were.

I had another 3 babies after those 2 abruptions. I had to have planned c-sections with the following babies all at 34wks or just before 34wks. They felt that 34wks was the earliest and safest time they could do the c-sections.

I try not to dwell on whats happened, even with the labour that i nearly died.... because i felt so lucky to be alive and to have my daughter.

My chances of having another abruption are really high.... scarily high actually. I have however met quite a few ladies online who've had an abruption and i'm the only one i've come across who has had 2 so i really don't think you have too much to worry about. Obviously you will be worried with your next pregnancy but don't let whats happened put you off having another baby.... certainly didn't put me off.

Wow..... sorry for the massive reply.... i can't chat/type for England lol.

serendipity I am so sorry to hear of your experiences. Thank you for sharing what happened to you. I realise how lucky I am that DS and I are fit and well.

How incredibly unlucky to suffer two abruptions of such a serious nature. Have the doctors told you why you are at such a high risk? Don't answer if you don't want to.

I am so happy you went on to have more successful pregnancies, despite having to have sections a little early. You have helped me realise that another DC is not completely off the cards if we decide that is what we'd like.

So sorry, been so busy i forgot to reply.

The only reason i'm high risk is simply due to have two severe abruptions. There are factors that increase your chances of an abruptions such as smoking, substance abuse, maternal trauma like a car accident etc.... but i had none of those in either pregnancies.

I did do a lot of research after i lost my daughter & became good friends with a lady in america who also lost her son to an abruption. We became pregnant with our next babies at the same time, i had another abruption and her pregnancy was fine.

Good luck with everything x

Sneezy, I really feel for you. I had an emergency CS (not crash) as DS was footling breech and it wasn't picked up until I was 5cm dilated with a foot in my cervix! We were in theatre within 10 minutes, and I wondered why the hurry as both DS and I were fine. It was only later that I learned that there is a high risk of cord prolapse and compression with footling breech babies.

And then the "what-ifs" started. My waters had broken 24 hours before labour started, and I'd been sent home to wait it out, having been told DS's head was well engaged . What if his cord had prolapsed while I'd been at home? What if I'd stayed at home longer? What if he'd been born brain damaged, or worse?

You have been through a massively more traumatic birth than me, and I think you're entitled to have questions you need answering. My sister had a very different traumatic birth experience (shoulder dystocia and baby needing resuscitation) and was offered a chance to talk to someone about what had hall ended, and why, and if anything could have been done differently. Maybe your hospital offers something similar?

In the meantime, all the advice above re CS after care is good. The one thing I'd add is that a little exercise as soon as you feel able (I just mean walking around the room to begin with!) can help prevent adhesions, and made me feel a lot better.

Take care of yourself and congratulations on your baby!

Wow, Serendipity you did go through a rough time, glad all's well now. Sneezy hope you're feeling better now?

Personally, I won't be having anymore DC's. I've just turned 40 (apparently age can be an abruption risk too) but previous to this I had a ruptured ectopic pregnancy which resulted in urgent surgery, plus two early MC's. I've got 2 healthy DC and I don't think I could put myself or DH through the stress. But that's just my situation. I'm sure if you decided to have any further DC, Sneezy you'd be really closely monitored.

Good luck

Tired I'm feeling great now. DS is four weeks old today and is currently snoring his head off next to me while I MN have a nap. DH and DD are making cornflake tart downstairs, so I'd rather not see the kitchen until its done! My incision has caused very little discomfort past the first week and I've been out and about with both DC lots since DH went back to work.

I do think we'd love a third at some point, but the fact I had no risk factors for an abruption scares me a bit as it means they can't be eliminated IYKWIM? So it's not like I could give up smoking as I don't do it anyway. I do think I'd be monitored more (I'd demand it if it wasn't offered) but it'd be the days inbetween that would concern me!

Spaniel I do think I'd like to talk to someone about the birth, even if we don't go for another. At the moment I don't really understand what happened so I'd like some more information. The consultant visited me briefly the day after the op, but as I was feeling quite well and was feeding DS he just told me it wouldn't happen again and then left!

Once again, thank you for all of the support and advice!

OP i know your original post was a while ago, but I just wanted to say that I had a text book 1st natural birth with DD1 despite her being back to back, so when I went into labour with DD2, who was also back to back, arrived at the hospital 4cm dilated and after 8 hours I was in loads of pain and still only 4cms I kept saying to the midwife 'somethings wrong, I can't do this, this isn't right', but they kept telling me that i was having productive contractions and maybe I needed to have some pethadine or go up to the labour ward (was in the natural birth centre) as I wasn't coping with the pain (was like a knife in the top of my bump) - I was in agony and sucking on the gas and air like a mad woman and agree that I needed more pain relief and I had this terrible pain, so they took me upto to the labour ward and got me on a monitor - immediately all hell broke loose, got rushed into surgery for a crash c-section (all of which my husband missed as they told him to go and put more money in the car as we were going to be there a while) - I had a concealed abruption, and luckily we were all fine.

But for weeks and weeks after, I kept having to retell the story (to anyone that would listen) as I was so shocked by how quickly and badly it went wrong, I couldn't process it without talking. So I told and retold my birth story and it really helped me. I had had a pain at the top of my bump from around 34 weeks that meant I struggled to lift DD1 and do things like push the trolley at the supermarket by the midwife dismissed it as I didn't have any spotting or bleeding

It has put me off DC3 as I got so little information from the staff at the hospital, there was no follow up and even now I don't know why it all happened.

Am glad you are doing well OP and congratulations on the birth of your son.