Has anyone given birth to a large baby without tearing?

[Sheldonella]

Just that really. I'm 40+2 and just had a midwife appointment. I measured 41 weeks and asked how big the baby is likely to be. She said most likely going to be big and with regards to the birth I can "have a go". I suppose she meant she expects me to need intervention or a section. I'm quite upset now :(

Hi everyone.

Well I said I would come back and update. She was 9lb 1oz. Due to needing help with forceps I was cut and I tore. This may not have happened if my labour had progressed a bit more normally but no matter, I still have a healthy girl and all is well.

Thanks for all your words of wisdom, they were a huge help.

Congratulations.

A tear isn't the end of the world, if you do find it gives you issues later on then get yourself over to the ragged bits thread, but hopefully you'll recover just fine (I did) :)

I had two big babies- 9.9 and 10.6. I did tear both times and had stitches, but it wasn't too bad, honestly. I recovered quickly and apart from the tears had easy labours and births. Happy to say more if you would like me to!

Many congratulations, Sheldonella!

Congratulations

Congratulations ! A lovely bouncing baby by the sound of it!

I feel cross at your midwife for putting this negativity into your mind. These throwaway comments can have a huge impact on a woman's confidence. Her assessment of baby's size is quite subjective anyway. Listening to your body rather than being told to push, and gentle pushes with the guidance of the midwife at the actual time of birth is possibly the best way to reduce the chances of perineal tears... no matter what the size of the baby.

I had second degree tears with both babies, 7'15 and 8'1 and honestly they healed fine. It obviously wasn't pleasant at the time but it was ok fairly quickly.

Also, a few drops of tea tree oil in the bath really help!

All my children were big at birth.

first son: around 37-3800 gram
second son: around 4 kilo
third son: around 4.5 kilo

I never had any tear nothing.

I lived in Holland when I got my first 3 boys.
Healthcare there is so much worse then over here. Every year to much newborns die or are stillborn due to to late medical intervention.

Nothing went wrong with my first child.

The second:
He didn't made the turn and they needed to do something quickly as he was stuck in me and without oxygen.
By this he broke his arm.

My third they looked at his size and he was going to be even bigger. Still nothing was being done. I asked with 37 weeks if it was possible that they induce me. But there was no need for that. Everything was going to be fine.

With result my son came with 40 weeks and was even bigger. Didn't make the turn and they had great difficulty with getting him out.
He didn't brake any bones, but he had been to long without oxygen. He was unconscious for 2 minutes and then he had to go in an incubator.

The first 48 hours we didn't know how he was going to be or if he had any brain damage.
I was so furious on my gynecologist who know he was so big, but didn't do anything to stop this from happening. Nothing I was able to do about it as I soon discovered he followed the guidelines/rules.

Then I came to live over here in England. I asked my GP if it was safe for me to have another child in the future. He said that here in England they wouldn't take the risk. Here they will look at the size of the child and if he gets to big they're either going to induce me or I'll have an cesarean.

No country is perfect, but be so thankful that you live over here. Especially if you're a parent. Healthcare and schools are so much better over here then in Holland.

I really think Europe should tick Holland on the fingers for the rubbish healthcare and schools. How can they sit back and let to much baby's die every year and become disabled simply due to rules that must be changed.

Then childcare is horrible.
About one in 40 households do get into contact with childcare. They take the children away from the parents so easily.
Even a depression is enough reason for to take the children away from the parents. Only some will get their children back, but most parents loose the kids and are able to see them once every month for just an hour.

Are you depressed during your pregnancy then they can take the child away straight after birth. Some mothers never even have seen their own child because after the cesarean the child was taken away and that was it.

I'm very thankful that we're able to come and live over here.

Have also heard that the midwives can't tell what size baby will be until it comes out.

I had second degree tear but I did't feel anything while baby was being born (waterbirth) and just a bit uncomfortable after. They say that water softens the tail end and helps it to stretch.

Marie Mongan book on Hypnobirthing def work a look.

I was told my third was defently a 10lb er, bought 0-3 months clothes, and she was 8lb 5oz, with a wardrobe of baggy clothes :P

oh and no stitches :)