Do I have another homebirth??

[Verekerlady]

DD was born at home where I had a birthing pool, a doula, 3 midwives (1 student), and husband there. It was fairly quick at 6.5 hours and no problems etc, all fine and DD was fine. But, it was incredibly painful and not calm and soothing like id hoped it would be. I also later found out that the lead midwife told my husband that if the baby was bigger then I would have had to go to hospital. So, with memories of the pain and panic when DD's heartbeat started to drop, I'm so confused about whether I want another homebirth. It would be lovely to have my next baby at home, but I'm still pretty scared after the first one. Does anyone have any similar stories??

I'm not averse to hospitals and am thinking that with my fear it might be sensible to not have a homebirth.....ahhhh, I don't know!

Why not book one, and then if you don't want it on the day, go into hospital? You don't need to decide until the last minute.

And lots of ladies have big babies at home, were there any specific complications that led the MW to say that to your DH?!

The ony complication was that DD's head kept almost coming out and then going back in no matter how hard I pushed. I remember wanting to punch one of the midwives when she kept telling me to push as hard as I could - what did she think I was doing?!? But DD's heartbeat didn't go down until about 2 mins before she came out.

I've been reading other threads about homebirths and all the lovely stuff written is why I want another one, but I'm a bit scared I guess. You're right though, I'd forgotten you can change your mind at the last minute!

Second babies are generally a bit easier anyway (apparently), but yes, you can decide at the last minute but if you do choose to stay at home, at least you'll have all the gubbins ready there!

I had dc4 at home after having the other 3 at hospital. He was eleven pounds and it was hard work, but uncomplicated. I'm now expecting dc5. I've been told that if baby is bigger, I will be advised to birth in hospital. I'm going to book a home birth and see how I get on. If I need to transfer to hospital, then I can. Why don't you try the same approach?

Yeah, I think that's what I should do. The more I think about a homebirth, the more I want one despite feeling scared about things going wrong. Might not tell my midwife that I'm scared, she tried to talk me out of the homebirth for DD and I have her again for this pregnancy. Last thing I need is a negative viewpoint from her!

Thanks :)

You can always ask to change midwife if you don't feel supported, or tell her that you're booking it but do not wish to discuss it further with her.

I'd second what Flisspaps said. Second babies really are easier in most cases, so I'd probably book for the homebirth and then see how you feel closer to the time (even on the day, if you want!).

My experience with my first sounds similar to yours (although in hospital). 2 hours pushing, ending with episiotomy as the head just wouldn't come out.

2nd I had at home 8 minutes ' second stage', got a bit excited pushing after my first experience and she came out in 1 . I think second labours are generally easier tbh. I was only in pain for about half an hour (well apart from the stitching, what a wally) :)