Preventing Birth Trauma in Hospital WARNING may be contoversial (sorry)

[Hoop1234]

Has anyone ever taken in a rape/personal alarm into hospital as a way of preventing birth trauma ?

naturalbaby you said "You've been through a horrible ordeal, but your birth could be a wonderful event that you are totally in control of if you are prepared."

I not sure about that to be honest. Birth is unpredictable and as for home birth and doula's and independent midwives - I think it depends on what you want as an individual. Some people want homebirth others want epidurals etc or even elective caesareans. It is about what you feel is right for you and we are all different.

I reckon, if, with your experiences, you feel safer with a rape alarm, take one with you but I agree with everyone else about talking this through with midwives.

Good luck - you've had terrible treatment on the NHS in the past - hope you have better treatment this time.

What exactly would a rape alarm achieve?

Giving birth can be a wonderful event that the woman is totally in control of, by preparing for it. It is for many women and that scenario doesn't have to be written off because of a bad experience the woman had in the past.

Of course some women want epidurals and elcs but they can still prepare for those births and feel that they are in control of what's going on.

To be honest, I think the OP has closed her mind to the options by expecting things to be so bad that a rape alarm to be her only option. Going into labour focusing on how you are going to fend off medical professionals is highly unlikely to result in a positive birth story.

OP sorry you've had such a bad experience. However I second the advice about talking to your midwife, having someone (partner, friend, relative) as a birth partner constantly by your side.

NaturalBaby A woman can be 100% prepared, have taken all the advice, done all the right things and still lose control and have a traumatic birth/suffer PTSD.

Shakey 1500, you are so right! I suffered a 4th degree laceration with a traumatic forceps and vacuum assist posterior childbirth. I nearly died from blood loss and was traumatized 5 weeks later by my now ex husband for forcing intimacy. In any event. It has been 24 years and I still have PTSD. I never had another child, and I left my ex because of what he did. In any event, if I could give any advice it would be to make sure you have doctors you can trust, and someone there to stand up for your rights when your most compromised during delivery.

Have a Plan A, Plan B, and Plan C to protect yourself. They cannot do anything to you while another person is there who is listening to you as an advocate. If you are worried about having your wishes honoured try writing them down prior to delivery getting them acknowledged by a notary and keeping it with you in your purse. Have the person who is your advocate know exactly what your wishes are before and during labour.

Good luck and Godbless!

I also encourage you to find a Doula!!! She will stay with you throughout your labour, birth, and post birth time, and will make sure your voice is hear and that nothing happens to you that you do not fully consent to.

Have a look at www.doula.org.uk

You can ask for an appointment to speak to the Supervisor of Midwives at your hospital. She will have experience of working with women who have been sexually abused/assaulted, and can help talk you through scenarios that might trigger problems and work out ways to avoid/deal with them. She will probably write all over your notes in red pen that nobody assisting at the birth will be able to miss. It is also worth looking at an experienced doula to be there at the birth, or getting a one-off session with an independent midwife to talk things through.

It's also worth thinking about feeding. If you want to breastfeed, you might want something in your notes about a preference for using biological nurturing (which is basically lying back, snuggling your baby and letting him find his own way to the breast) and getting express permission before touching your breasts.

Good luck.

Hoop1234 your question seems strange to many I think because they are coming from the assumption that the only reason you seek medical assistance is to be... well ... assisted.

If you are not sure that the people you are seeking help from will at the least do you no deliberate harm I think you really need to have a radical rethink of how you are approaching your birth.

I wouldn't contemplate a hospital environment if I were you unless it were really necessary to save your or your baby's life.

I'd advocate a private mw and a homebirth if at all possible. Also research about the process of birth so that you are prepared as much as possible and try hypnobirthing to manage your fears.

Your experience with the GP and other health professionals sounds really awful but please try to remember it is very very unusual and so would be very very unlikely to happen again.