I just need sympathy and reassurance

[Purplelooby]

Hello nice people, I just need to hear that I'll get better even though of course no one can know this...

I'm now 26 days post-labour and since delivery I've had to have a blood transfusion, am still anaemic and on iron, have been back in hospital with baby twice (breastfeeding issues which sadly I eventually had to give up on) and my stitches are still infected (E. coli so my first antibiotics weren't the right ones) and even on my second, laboratory-tested, antibiotics I can tell the infection isn't clearing. And there are no more antibiotic options left as the other ones that this strain of E. coli is sensitive to are all penicillin-derivatives which I'm allergic to. And amongst all of this I'm trying to look after my first baby! Oh and I caught a stinking cold, probably because my bodies natural flora is now dead.

So if you have had similar, please reassure me that I'll recover! I feel so ill and I've no energy to deal with the early days of motherhood, where normally I'm a very energetic and bouncy person

awww purple. This sounds horrific, sending huge .

I had similar - infected section wound, throat infection and an infected hair follicle on my arse all within 14 days of her being delivered. I also couldn't breastfeed as she was very prem and expressing just didn't work.

It does get better, DD is now asleep on me, I have gin (possibly the only perk of not breastfeeding) and everything is just lovely.

I recommend lots of nice food and accepting all help offered (even if you, like me, wouldn't normally). Keep talking on here, and have chocolate :)

Congratulations on the birth of your DC

Poor you
Sounds like a really nasty ordeal. I haven't been through the same thing, but felt awful for a good few weeks after my birth and third-degree tear. You will gradually perk up and get your strength back.
Have you got family/friends helping you? Are you taking vitamin supplements and eating well?
Are the doctors monitoring your infection?

Chatting in the office last week we remarked on the fact that however horrid your pregnancy/birth/post-natal experiences, by the time the baby is a year old you will have totally forgotten about it! Otherwise no one would ever have more than one!

Oh how miserable for you.
On a practical level get some decent pro-biotics from the health food shop as your body must be shot to pieces. Want that immune system up and running.
Don't feel a failure over breast feeding. I 'failed' with my first child and I still bring myself down about it but the reality is he's now 7 and healthy. Do start to look at what you enjoy now you a mummy, this list will grow and grow. Put the negatives aside. No point in beating yoursel up about it. Your baby is loved, fed, nurtured etc.

Health wise - just keep on at the medical people, hope there's some really kind supportive ones.

And this will pass. It will. Doesn't feel like it now, but you will recover and feel well again ( knackered but well).

So sorry to hear you are going through this. What sort of support are you geting from friends/family? Have the health visitors/GP's been helpful?

I had something similar - I had an infection, which luckily cleared with antibiotics, but within 2 weeks of the birth I had an ear infection in both ears that was so bad that I could not close my mouth. SO painful and could only take paracetamol as was breastfeeding. Then my baby caught a cold at 3 weeks and I was so exhausted and worried I think I nearly had some sort of breakdown.

Also had a baby that would not sleep unless he was on me , either that or he was on my boob permanently. I also had no help from any friends or family.

But , after finding Mumsnet, I got some great advice on here and it all did get better from then on .

Are you drinking plenty of fluids?

I second what Pancake says about the probiotics - you can get some great ones from Holland and Barrett. Think they are called Acidophilous?

You poor thing. I had a very bad 2nd degree tear & it got infected, it was awful. I was pretty low & had virtually no immunity. DD wouldnt feed, got skinny & had horrific reflux. We mix fed & I sobbed with every bottle.It seemed like it would never end.
It did!! I found a great new support network at baby groups. I went to one pretty much every day. I was a baby group junkie!
DD is 3 & DC2 is due in Jan. I begged MW, HV & DH never to let me have another baby!! We still see our core group of friends a few times a week & we've all helped each other through the DCs trying periods!!
((hugs))!!

You poor thing Bag loads of sympathy winging it's way to you. You must feel like crap

I agree with the probiotic recommendation - get the ones from the fridge in Holland and Barrett. Also lots of fluids. Take it easy and get lots of rest.

It's hard but try to have easy to eat, whole food snacks available to keep your strength up and help to heal you.

Is there anyone who can pop in to give you some support?

It will get better. It just feels never ending right now. In time, this too shall pass.

HUGS! (not normally allowed on MN!!!)

Thank you so so much everyone - I'm definitely going to look into these pro-biotics. I'm supposed to drink 3 L of water a day on these antibiotics but either I'm trying to entertain/feed a very hungry baby, or else he's asleep and I haven't even got the energy to walk to the kitchen (like now, cuddled under a blanket on the sofa).

My support network is wierd - DH is very supportive but is of course at work all day. My parents live very close but they both work too so by the time they could come to offer support, DH is home anyway... (by the way, I have MASSIVE respect for single mums). Only 4 hours sleep in total last night which isn't helping matters and DS has become massively hungry all the time, but I'm worried that because I'm so low in energy, I'm not exploring other options for why he's crying (although he does try to eat my arm/neck/jumper every time I hold him so I'm fairly sure it's hunger...)

Midwife and HV have been pretty good TBH, especially about sorting out GP appointments, medication, etc. My poor midwife can't believe I'm still under her care after nearly a month - she keeps joking that she'll be there at DS's christening. HV is giving me extra support too but it's once a fortnight and I feel like I could do with it once an hour!