Homebirth with older DC in the house

[MakeTeaNotWar]

I'm 38 +2 with DC2 and planning a homebirth. Depending on when labour starts, we have a list of friends to call on to look after DD who is 2. But if everything starts up at night, I am hoping she will just sleep through. Has anyone else had a homebirth with other children in the house - did your labour wake them up? Our house is a small bungalow and her bedroom is next to the bathroom but I plan to labour in a pool in the lounge. Would love to hear how it worked out for others!

Ds was 7 he slept through 2 baths midwives coming and going.
I gave birth downstairs.
He was very surprised to wake up a big brother !!

I have had 4 home water births and all have always been at home, but not in room, for birth of siblings.

My body seems to understand waiting till the coast is clear - contractions were twingey rather than painful with DC2 until DC1 was in bed, but produced a baby within 80mins of bedtime! DC3 needed sweeps to get him to shift. DC4 ran it a bit close - DH had to get 3DC to bed quite quickly so eldest wasn't asleep when youngest arrived - in fact he met both DCs3+4 when they were still in the pool :)

I'm sure your DD will be fine and excited to meet the baby

DD1 was almost 2 when DD2 was born - labour was from 9pm until 6am (downstairs from her room) and she slept through the whole thing - I woke her up after I'd had a shower to tell her the new baby was downstairs with grandma, who'd just arrived. I've heard many similar stories of perfect overnight timing so hopefully your experience will be a good one - good luck!

I plan for perfect overnight timing too DS1 is nearly 8 and tends to sleep like a log, so fingers crossed! Either that, or maybe he'll come home from school in the afternoon to discover he's a big brother

i had ds1 at 8:30pm and dd woke up a sister.
ds2 was born at 9:30am after dd was taken to preschool by grandma and ds1 went with her.
In fact ds2 was crowning as mum was walking through the door and i stopped pushing and shouted though don't come in the living room, then carried on!

Yes, had ds3 at home at night in kitchen underneath other boys room. Ds2 terrible sleeper then/still. Slept through the whole thing - pool filling/emptying, midwives, my screams, champagne corks!. Delighted the next morning to meet new baby. Wonderful way to do it. Best of luck.

Am hoping for some of that perfect timing in a week or two myself as am also planning a home waterbirth for DC2 and hoping DD (nearly 2) can wake up to her new sibling :-) Good luck, lets hope it works for us all!

DSs were awake when DD was born. However, I suddenly needed them to be gone now It was such a strong feeling! They left and DD was born 17 minutes later. :)

I think you need to be prepared to have someone take your DS out - I was taken by surprise at how strongly I needed DSs gone.

Oh these are all very encouraging. Had been wondering about waking DS up to get him out of the house if necessary, and fretting about it - he's never stayed a night away from me. Good to hear that some light sleepers slept through too! Will keep watching this with interest, thanks OP!

My then just 2 year old watched her sister be born at home. It was planned like that with my parents on standby if she didn't cope. It was at a convenient time in the morning though.

It was wonderful. She sat on her Dad's lap at the business end and cheered me on yelling 'Push, Mummy, push'. And when the head crowned I heard 'I can see my baby sister!'

She's got such lovely memories of it all even still at aged 9.

I realise this perhaps isn't for everyone!

I have attended lots of homebirths and plenty in the night where the DC have slept through - IME experience I have found it best to have a back-up plan, in case they wake up. I have known mums to stall spectacularly in ther labour out of concern for their exisiting DC.
Some ladies have a friend/family member to come and 'sleep' upstairs to prevent any 'wanderings'

Good luck OP

DD1 (3) slept through 99% of DD2's birth.

I heard her get up just before the last push and remember thinking - Please go to the loo like you always do before coming in.

She did and met her sister aged about 3minutes old.

Took no notice of me delivering the placenta. Sister was far more interesting.

MWs had asked me to arrange child care and I had rung my friend to warn her she might be needed. But by the time things got going DD1 was fast a sleep (she had taken a very long time so I assumed DD2 would too and that I could wake friend in the morning).

In fact DF brought her DDs to meet the baby, which was lovely and would have not been allowed in hospital, then took DD1 for tea so DH, DD2 and I could have some peace.

As for the MWs, I don't know if they'd remembered about DD1, they'd both met her at antenatal appointments. They never mentioned her during labour and seemed totally unfazzed by her sudden appearance.

We had an accidental home-birth with DD2, DD1 spent the (thankfully short) labour pushing board games at me, and at the crescendo of the affair, ran round the business end and squealed "Bleuchy, Mummy".

However, I do genuinely feel it offset any possible bonding problems - DD1 witnessed DD2's birth, and was utterly unperturbed by it (bar the mess I was making, obviously ) and I did feel, despite the low-level drama caused by an unexpected home-birth, it was such an unfussy natural happy way to welcome DD2. We were so lucky, all was well, and the shared experience brought us so much closer both then and now when we reminisce.

All 3 of mine have been born at home and the older ones jsut slept through the baby's birth. Both times they woke just after the baby was born so came down and saw the baby still attached to the cord etc which was lovely. It is wonderful when they get to meet them all properly new :)

I had a list of childcare options too. I had it pinned to the notice board with times the different people could do and who could be phoned for school runs, who could do nights etc just in case I needed to transfer. I figured it was a good idea to have it and if I had been having a hospitla birth I'd have needed childcare anyway.

I'd have loved to have them see it in a way. I think ds1 in particular woul dhave loved to see ds2 born, he had loved going through books and learning about everything. The MW gave him a good detailed look at teh placenta when it was delivered :) My body has good timing though, in each labour contractions have started some time after midnight and baby has arrived 5 or 6am ish.

I should add that our house is sort of open plan, with the stairs directly off the living room.

Loads of talking downstairs and DD2 was born in our bedroom. I walked up and down the stairs several times and went to the upstairs loo. The MWs stuff was in the spare bedroom. I cannot believe that DD1 didn't know that something was going on.

Mind you I slept through my DSIS HB at a very similar age, perhaps there is some instinct that ensures we leave our Mothers to get on with it.

Thanks so much for sharing your experiences! Feeling much more reassured now

Hello: I am currently feeding DS, who was born at home just over 4 weeks ago. I'd planned lots of coverage options for the two weeks either side of my due date and in the end it couldn't have been more perfect; my oldest friend was staying with us with instructions to take DD (2 yrs old) to / from nursery etc as appropriate depending on when I went into labour.

I called the midwife at 7:30 am or so and friend took DD to nursery shortly after so I was able to not think about DD during the rest of labour - DS was born at 12:15 so only a few hours later. Our friend also picked her up from nursery (as well as making soup and putting loads of laundry on! Excellent friend).

I felt quite strongly in advance that I wouldn't have wanted DD around while I was trying to focus on labouring and I'm pretty glad she wasn't around: I'm quite glad it wasn't at night with her sleeping at home either, because the bathroom is right next to her room and I did labour in the bath some of the time, suspect that might have been a bit harder to sleep through though who knows...

Meant to say, very best of luck with it!